Drowning

I poem I made while listening to some music. It's about losing in life.

Drowning in my day dreams I listen to the beat

In spite of the inability to come up with any feats

I’m trying to come up with poetry that will make critics dance in their seats

Even though the rhythms weak and I’m filled with defeat

I keep on living

Giving everything I have

Listening to the voice inside my head like smooth jazz

Even if my existence has no pizazz

I can at least act like it does

Get in the ring

Put on the gloves

Fight till the finish

Clean up with gauze

Even if I get booed rather than applause

My body feels raw

Every little thing hurts

I’m not a little squirt

But I thought I would l learn how to deal with pain

Everything I ever saw as important

Everything that mattered

Is now is tatters

Making me start over again

Drowning in selfish hopelessness I listen to the beat

I’d really like to meet with someone that cares

I have so much to share

But I’ll leave it inside cause I’d rather live a lie

Every day I die a little more inside

Keeping the door to my heart wide open leaves scars

 My soul is fried and marred by being pushed too far by others

I’m behind bars that turn out to be the lines of my own poems

I don’t owe em’ anything

But many sing the song that I do

You know it’s true

I suffocate on the hate while I write about fate

I’m not satan

But people keep on hatin’

And now I’m waiting for the end

Knowing my suicidal self it’s right around the bend

I send my regards to the people still hurting, I know it’s hard

But there’s nothing I can do to help you, I’m also scarred

I like to pretend I’m strong, but I’m wrong

And when the disguise of strength is gone

What do I have to hold onto to but my conviction?

I’m fixing my life as fast as I can

But I pick up the pieces slower than they fall

It makes me feel small

Walking down cold brick halls alone

My love turned to stone

Now it’s too hard to deal with

Still feel s**t but I’m numb

Not dumb enough to stop

I’ve still got things to do and pimples to pop

Gotta look good before I’m cremated

Fated to be hated and negated, a life of wanting never sated

I feel like I’ve mated and dated my own life, and now we’ve broke up

 I’ve been baited into this new reason to cut my wrists, like I’m not enough

I can’t take a piss without being reminded of how easily this could have all been avoided

But this feeling is old and reality is cold

It beats you up and leaves you for dead

I wish it just put a bullet in my head

But life had to drag things on and make it difficult

Making me feel like it’s my fault

Still, I know I could have avoided a slow defeat

Didn’t have to stand on my two feet when I was ordered to sit down

Could have just stayed in my seat and not said anything then

But would that make me any better than them?

The gap between me and others isn’t thin

I’d try to weld my soul back into the social norm

But I’m busy fighting with a coastal storm

I feel like it's me against everything, me against the world

My patience is growing thin

It’s a challenge I can never win

I wish I could go back to the past and begin again

This has gone on for so long I’ve forgotten who I used to be

I wish other people could see me for me

Not the hate that seems to be the key to my coffin

Coughing up my pride and spit from my lungs to save my hide

It makes me sick to my stomach

Here goes last week’s dinner

Oh he’s such a winner

He’s getting thinner because he’s eating up his words, delicious

But these poems are nutritious

They give me the energy to keep living

If I believed in sinners everyone would be one, giving everyone the right to realize they were wrong

Might as well take a hit from the bong of truth, tastes like s**t though

I watch the children grow

I wonder how their lives will go

How high or low society will throw these suckers

Riding life makes you realize she’s a bucker

Try not to get your skull crushed under the hoofs of things you lose

Like your innocence, your trust, or your happiness

Capture this; it’s a moment that you might look back on

Even if I’m wrong, it won’t be long before you realize not to take your time alive for granted

Don’t let every little bump hurt

Or you’ll be branded a loser and won’t get any dessert

But I’d rather be burnt than have to deal the same tactics that that branded me first

Dealing with haters, liars and hypocrites is the worst

Sorry to burst your bubble, I’m being subtle, but don’t pick on the others, you have just as many sisters and brothers as me

I feel free when I’m

Drowning in my sorrows as I listen to the beat

I want you to meet the meat of my life

I’ll never have a wife, but my mom and dad are pretty nice

My sisters kind of annoying, but I love her alright

My life is a kite; don’t know where the wind will take me

But I’ll take in the sights

Don’t pick fights with someone with their head in the clouds

It wasn’t that way in the past shouldn’t be that way now

So how do you do?

You read this far too

So thank you

For listening to me shout about losing while I pretend I can win

I’m building up a tent to keep the bad thoughts out, want to come in?

Too cold out to swim, too hot out to breath, too much medication, I’d rather be on weed

If you hear what I’ve been listening to, I’m sorry I’m off key

Drowning in a day dream while I listen to the beat

Author's Note

I very seldom reply to reviews, but I promise I read EVERY single one. I look forward to my next review, because it helps me learn. Even if it's just one word, I promise, I will be ecstatic to have the chance to hear what you have to say. Whenever you write something about my poems, or the themes of my poems, or criticize me it is not in vain. I will listen, learn and be thankful.

Reviews

[Bear]

You have some very creative rhyme schemes and the musical theme is just as inventive. Nicely done my friend Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!

[wordman]

we are many things,like music flowing through our minds,drown in love,that`s better than no love