Fallen in Autumn

Sultry Mrs. Vixen;

My lustrous Vampiress Princess.

Lost sight of the lie,

Then exiled from

Your Eden heart.

Thine Oedipus eyes

Seduced the Exodus plight.

Never denying,

Providing the bottom line

Above your eyes.

No tears for my Icarus cries.

Magik and the Divine.

Your grace

Has summoned my mind

With your taste.

A drip of blood is all

That remained on your fangs.

Your pendulum waist

Unwinds my mental waste.

Desires and our fire contained

Within the rock portal;

Speaking with only cups and a string

-Aeneas and Dido

Unmortals

Unhonest

Untestimonious

My hell swells, swells, and swells;

Dwelling in your fornever

Ending wishing well

I upheld with dying stars.

Touch me too!

Author's Note

Voila

Reviews

[SleeplessVolcano]

Ahhh....those autumn (or fall) stumbles....do they quite compare to the ones in summer?

Delightful read, as always.

The upside is, as one star dies, it's black hole is beginning of a new one, right? (I am a poet, if I say so, it is true....lol)

[sinNsincerity]

Summer can be quite cold.
It's all a Russian Doll.

[DanielaMorris]

I love the imagery that your use of words shoots out (: good job

[Allie]

I liked it very much. It was mysterious and creepy in which i like to read. Keep up the good work!!!

[Tashida]

Every time I read one of your poems, i'm always at a lost for words at the end of them. I don't know how you do it but I LOVED it ;) I loved the imagery, just basically every last word in it. They all fit so perfectly. As usual, it has been a pleasure to read your work and my mark has been left. I can go now. Until next time ;)

[Kittenincake]

"Your pendulum waist
Unwinds my mental waste."

I love the visualization here. This not only gives life to the verse, but a feminine and picturesque illustration in just one line. The follow up is perfect.

[EcstaticEuphoria]

I love the vampire essence and the sense of illusion in this work...
"Unmortals
Unhonest
Untestimonious"
What a feeling most have felt in love, but it still draws us in like a vampire to the taste of blood. Keep it up!

[Lady_Wicca]

Sorry I don't believe in the Judaeo-Christian God. All your stuff is copyrighted by writerscafe.org. But you keep on writing. I use various sites to publish my writings. http://storyenet.com, and http:.//storywrite.com

[Hebe]

Wonderful! very fiery and has an exotic note to it! great write enjoyed reading it !

[Asya Kardzhaliyska]

I quite like this piece, it has a nice rhythm and flow to it; however, the things that didn't work for me personally were the first and last lines, I thought they didn't quite fit in well enough with the rest of the story. But I'm sure with a quick rewrite that won't be the case, and this is all advice anyway, so if you feel it aids your poetry then you don't have to listen to me!

[Poetic License]

Loving on this big time!

I could eat up those words like candy! Your references in classical myth - perfection.

Unmortals
Unhonest
Untestimonious

Simply fabulous. I returned to read this twice. Hats off. This was fun and intoxicating.

[KTizzle]

I liked the juxtaposition of the references. Really illustrates a kind of bad-for-me-but-feels-good vibe. Kinda thought the last part was a little random, but everything else was pretty cool.

I really liked these lines: "Thine Oedipus eyes. Seduced the Exodus plight." I loved the use of Oedipus as something forbidden, but then there's a kind of freedom to it with reference to the "Exodus plight." I'm not sure how to understand that part.

-Jazz