An Evening in God's Den

I said, 

great,"

looks

"heaven

but...

I wasn’t tooo

hesitant to 

make 

it 

back 

P

u

while we were wake n’ bakin’.

Baby, tell me is it a sin because 

we’re living in God’s den

and all I can think about 

is you and I naked?

Adam and Eve 

made the devil 

easy to believe,

so would you 

be shocked that 

I’m on my knees

ready to please.

Please!

Let us be at ease?

Sometimes I like to play the tease ---

fulfilling all of your fantasies.

It ain’t hard to tell ---

creating paintings with the vacant.

Space can never get in our way;

face -- ecaf

eyes never blinking

creating a for never ending ecstasy

The way you bite my neck has my lip quivering.. ..

;=-0998

They must be mistaken 

to think 

that I 

have made 

a 

mistake.

The angels will have to come and 

rip 

m

 

e 

a

 

w

a

v

/

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

You must of got lost. Not God's den.
"The way you bite my neck has my lip quivering!
They must be mistaken to think that I have made a mistake .
The angels will have to come and rip me away."
Good flow of thoughts led to the very nice ending. Thank you for sharing the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[sinNsincerity]

It is God's den, that's the irony...
Thank you for reading!

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[Jessica Lima]

In truth I was too distracted by the arrangement to focus on the poem. Sometimes less is more. But you always must stand behind your work and realize that's a reflection on you. so idk. keep writing.

[Einstein Noodle]

great poem to open a discussion on Apologetics .. there are some points of contention to be sure .. i am in the dark as to ";=-0998" but that's OK ..it can be your own personal secret brand or some street smarts i am so out of touch with ;) it doesn't take away from the poem for me .. does God have a right to judge us?? according to Jesus' teachings we certainly do not ..not even to judge ourselves ... God (who i believe exists) certainly does .. but i am convinced that it will not be judging as our minds can think of it ..i was instantly attracted by the form you used ... way carried away in closing ..or rather ripped away ... small typo (i think) last line not "V" .. but Y
i really enjoyed all the form play you use ..it took several re-readings to see some of it ... clever and challenging for this old codger ;) there is so much to talk about in your poem ..nice job
E.

[Giulia King]

I loved reading this poem! Amazing work :)

[Donicca Dona L]

Baby, tell me is it a sin because
we’re living in God’s den
and all I can think about
is you and I naked?

I don't why but lately I feel to this related'' all I can think about is you and I naked''
How can love be a sin, if it's ''a sin or mistake'' I will do it thousand of time, because it's on my nature to love you and even God can't change that. Beautiful written. I really enjoyed reading it

[Hebe]

The structure is so artistic ...., and the poem left a smile on my face.... why go anywhere? right here right now is heavenly.... you expression is amazing!

[Mystery Girl1234]

A really good decriptive poem. Remarkably done. Two thumbs up!

[richieb]

Good creative angle, honest and truthful. We are creatures of lust and we live in God's den. We are all guilty. enjoyed your poem.
Peace,
Richie b.

[Alex Ware]

I really enjoyed the language in this, but especially the physical structure. You've done such interesting things there.

[sinNsincerity]

Thank you, I'm really glad that you had enjoyed it.

[Hope Rose]

"I wasn’t tooo
hesitant to"

I like this. Just one small thing is getting to me. "tooo" has one too many "o's". Sorry if it irritates you, me saying that, but it's rather distracting to me. Otherwise, very good. It has amazing imagery, which is definitely a good thing. Great work, my friend :)

[sinNsincerity]

I know that, but I write in 3'some and its multiples. No worries, I appreciate it though. The fact that the third "o" stood out to you means that it did its job.

[Hope Rose]

Ah okay. I see now

[Shannon]

I will say that, while it is a little too conceptual for me, I get a "how can this really be a sin?" message.

[sinNsincerity]

hehe Thank you