How Bad is Bad?

How Bad is Bad?

She said to let her go in alone.

I replied, "Let’s go in alone together."

Two lonely natives, city lives, and living wild; though, raised to love...

We intermingled with others, while searching for a better name.

Atticus, she's dragging the lake.

She loves the pain, she is beyond dangerous, she’s insane!

She will never make it to the morning because at night she always forgets my name.

She's murder, robbing me of my thoughts and well being.

The echoes of her darkest words ever said bleed through my veins.

Mental tattoos, far from being forgotten.

The pain is refreshed as my heart is rotting.

Soon I’ll be heartless, the question that remains is will she take my soul?

Who is she?

She is me!

Reviews

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Seems more like the inner demon we hold inside us which takes over us only too often...

"Two lonely natives, city lives, and living wild; though, raised to love..."
This line attracted me the most. Also "let's go in alone together" was a good one.
Interesting twist at the end.. I enjoyed reading this.

[sinNsincerity]

Indeed and I have written about my inner demon in other poems as well.
I'm glad you like those lines Yumma!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

You're welcome, sNs! A pleasure reading this :))

[Coyote Poetry]

Powerful words made the reader believe. I enjoyed this poem. I felt the control leading to the proper ending. Thank you my friend for sharing the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[Cherrie]

Great dual twist from two personalities too a surprise ending. Your poem plays out like late night movie. It has attitude formatted in a gentle rhyme.

[Hebe]

Love the description of the creature that lives within, the constant battle we have to keep us going !

[Asya Kardzhaliyska]

I like how the only villain in this piece is yourself, that's a very interesting touch! My only slight criticism is your use of the semi colon:
"and living wild; though, raised to love..."
I feel as though it work better as either a comma or a full stop, but it's only a suggestion!

[Jessica Lima]

A dangerous, unpredictable woman is indeed addicting eh? Calm and collected is the new boring I dare say.

Nice write

[Ana B.]

Everytime i see an RR from you i think i'm in for a treat :) And of course, i'm never disappointed! Love the dance of the subconsciousness going on here, we are forever destined to mingle between two polarities, no matter how clear the mind seems to be. Lovely done dear David.
Your fan, Ana.

[Fanicia E.]

I really like this! It makes me think of how I feel when the self-loathing starts to surface. Very well executed and easy to relate to. I also like the twist at the end where "she" is revealed to be you. Great job!

[MsJewel]

A powerful introspective write - some really great lines, actually too many to pic my favorite. Going in my library. This one is a keeper, Julie

[sinNsincerity]

Thank you so much Julie, I'm really that you had enjoyed it!

[OhSnapShley]

Lets go in alone together.. Love that!

[Poetic License]

I. Get. This. Oh do I get this. I have been two separate people for so long, that it is a daily adventure trying to get them to mingle and play nice. I think you've struck upon what we all experience, especially anyone who has experienced trauma and loss.

"The echoes of her darkest words ever said bleed through my veins."

This really spoke to me. I have experienced this time and again. What the "good girl" perceives to be the darkness creeping in, taking over, flooding her and thinking that nothing good can come of this. Like a slow possession story.

I really enjoyed this and identified with it readily. Well done.