Commitment To Sin

      The lines on her wrist drip with new words
      As tongues of true poets caress the wounds.
      She finds herself unable to stop,
      Cutting ever deeper through the flesh of memories.

      A rush of red regret as she hacks into
      A vein of trauma and forgotten screams.

      Her skin white with fear as she remembers the fist

      Blackening and bruising her all too fragile soul.

She snaps back from the nightmares 

Of things that go bump in the night, 

Breaks from her trance to see black blood

Painting the picture of her past 

Onto a cold, callous page. 

She takes hold of the pen, 

Raises her hand above the paper,

And cuts again.

Author's Note

It's finished now (:
As always, constructive criticism is always welcome, even if it's just over something like layout. I want to become a better writer (:
Thanks for reading (: ♥

Reviews

[.shalynn.009.]

An interesting take on a cutting poem. I personally think cutting is a thing people should talk about more, because it's too taboo, and generally means the person doing it is asking for help. The act of cutting is a strange thing, The only way of expressing inner pain, for those who do it, is do create a physical pain for people to see. And the healing of the physical pain sends the message that the emotional pain could heal as well. (Sorry, my brother and best friend used to cut, one of them when I was in elementary school. I learned a bit about the psychology behind it). But I'm glad this kind of digressed from that theme, turning the act of writing into a form of cutting, so that the words are the spilling of the subject's blood, rather than simply taking a knife to the skin. I didn't take this as a cutting of the body, because of the writing in it, but a cutting of the soul.

As for the layout, I was wondering why you formatted it the way you did. The way I saw it (with the line "She snaps back from the nightmares") I thought perhaps it was a tonal shift, from the kind of nightmarish quality of the first two stanzas to the cold reality of wherever the speaker is, staring at the page in front of her. A blank page is like a symbol of a new start, with her snapping back from her memories to the present, yet in the end she went back to what she had been dreaming about.

That's just my interpretation of this poem. Not the literal cutting, but the use of the cutting as a metaphor. I liked this poem a lot, just as I like all of your work. I actually like your poetry more than your songs. The reading it, at least, since I've never heard your songs. Keep writing and thanks for the RR.

[Deactivated_BurningDemo..]

Beautiful twist at the end. I love it. Not like the typical cutter poems. Nice work.

[Ashley]

i have to admit this was difficult to read. i've never physically harmed myself but felt the need to many times. it's a very trying thing to read, but it was written in a way that makes the pain perhaps a bit more understandable for those who don't understand it.

[Jessica Marlow]

very interesting... i was a cutter once it is something i regret way to much i wish i could go back and tell myself what i wasnt thinking back then... back then i didnt see a future but now i do:)

[LoopyLoo]

Whoa. Deep. :-) This is quite a harsh poem. :-) Good Job.

[Sukriti Suki]

Physical pain always hurts people who care...scars should be hidden deep inside, where they can be brought out just to remind...I like your style and the first 2 stanzas but am never fond of this matter.

[Chris Smith Welshpoetcs]

Your poem shows the agony, the need to be understood, the pain is a way of feeling the hurt around.But the realisation is the past can never be cut away because it always comes back to haunt us. Strong poem my friend.

[Calypso]

I feel like I've where you talk of.

[Midnight_Mystery]

Loved it! nicely done :)

[Tasha]

This has two possible meanings... it could be about a cutter trying to cut her emotions out, or about a writer cutting out the words... either way you look at it I loved it! :)

[?]

At first I was thinking it was about cutters, but then I dug deeper and realized it was more than that. About a writer digging deep, cutting deep into the emotions and putting it down on paper. wow,
Well now Hope that Im right about this, if not blame it on the blonde part of me. lol
Great powerful piece.