Max

Another one from a while ago. This one is still in my life.

I sit at the computer, writing my book. I hear you come into the library. I don’t know it is actually you until I hear your voice at the counter. I look at the black screen of the computer next to me. You’re in a suit. You start toward me when you see me out of your peripheral.

            “Pleasure or business?” I ask as you come up behind me. My voice is neutral.

            “Need to know.” You answer as you place your arms around me, bracing yourself on the desk. You breath is in my ear. I try and breathe evenly. I know you know that my heart rate has accelerated. You’ve always been able to notice that change. I lean back as I feel the heat coming from your body. “Come with me.” You say quietly. I click out of everything on the computer. I remove my flash-drive and logout. We walk out of the library and onto the cold streets of downtown. You automatically pull off your jacket and place it around my shoulders. I smile.

            “Always the gentleman.” I say softly. You smile weakly. “What about my car?” I ask as we pass it.

            “I’ll come back and get it later.” You say to me. I figure it’d be better to just shrug it off and listen. I see your car. Once again, I find myself smiling.

            “Same old car.” I laugh. I see you try to hide a smile. I get in your car and sink back into the familiar smell of your car. Suddenly, I feel weird. “I want you back.” I say softly.

            “What do you think I’m doing?” you ask me.

            “You didn’t specify whether this was business or pleasure.” I replied.

            “Pleasure.” You answer. “It’s good you want me back.” You say. I look at you in question. “Because I want you back, too. But we gotta get a few things straight.” You say with a grimace. My face fell.

            “How many times do I have to apologize, Max?” I asked exasperated.

            “I don’t want your apologies anymore. I just want to know if I can trust you.” You answer.

            “You can.” I say, knowing that it’s going to go further than this.

            “How?” you ask, drumming your fingers on the steering wheel. I sigh.

            “That’s something you decide. I can’t decide that for you. I can give you my word,”

            You interrupt me. “What can words do?” you ask.

            “Hitler.” I remind you. “Or I can give you my word that I’ll slice open my veins if you say I do it again.” I answer. “And you know I’ll do it, Max. Remember the night you drove me to the hospital?” I ask.

            Thank God we were sitting at a red light for your head smacked the steering wheel. “Yeah, I do.” You answer weakly. I look down at my wrist and see the scars.

            “That’s why you can trust my word. Cause you know my actions reflect my words.” You look at me.

            “I know.” You say.

            “Then please trust me again, Max.” I plead with you. “I miss you, Max. I want my friend back.” My voice cracks and tears spill over my eyes.

            You turn into your driveway. “I just moved in.” you say. You get out of the car and come around to my side. You open my door and help me out. You hold onto my hand and search for your keys with the other. You unlock the door and let me in.

            I am greeted by a room with boxes. There are only two items other than the boxes: a TV and a couch. You lead me off towards another room. I glimpse an empty kitchen on the way. We come to a stop at the end of the hall. I presume the room behind the door to be a bedroom.

            You open the door.

            “This is the only room truly furnished.” You tell me.

            A large oak bed sits in the middle of the floor. The room is darkened by dark brown curtains over light brown gauzy ones. The bed is neatly made, and the gold sheets peer out from underneath a brown suede comforter.

            “You like brown.” I note. You nod your head. “You aren’t afraid of growth or change.”

            You look at me in surprise. “How’d you know that?”

            “My psychologist.” I answer. You nod your head again. I nod my head aimlessly and yawn. You give me another weak smile. I return it lazily. I walk over to your bed and kick off my shoes. I slip into your comfy looking bed. You give me a grin and a shake of the head. “You tempted me. I am tired. There is a bed. So,” I say smiling up at you. “I’m going to use it for what it’s supposed to be used for.” I say matter of factly.

            “Sex?” you ask me with a smile.

            I stick my tongue out at you. “No. Sleep.” I say. I continue to smile up at you. You close your eyes and tilt your head back as you laugh softly at me. I close me eyes and get comfy. Then I feel the bed shift. I feel your body heat beside me. I smile lazily and snuggle up to you. You wrap your arms around me. I hug you. You return my hug and kiss me on the top of the head. I tilt back my head and place a kiss on your chin. You snort and move your head down so that I can give you an actual kiss. Which I do. I kiss you softly.

            “Sleep.” You say to me. “You need it.” I nod at you and lay my head on your chest. I fall asleep and dream peacefully.