11.The message

3 years after I gave my statement Jess finally comes forward.

Life carried on in a state of panic, I'd have days where things were alright but then I'd have days where such efforts had to be made just to make it through the day.

One afternoon I received a message on my Facebook account, it was from Jessica, the girl I was living with when I'd been abused, my step sister. She had messaged me to tell me she had reported Steve to the police for rape and that he was going to stand trial. I was pleased she had come forward but couldn't help but think back to when I had reported it 3 years previously. With me they had interviewed Jess in the same house as Steve they didn't take her out to the station to be interviewed. I told them it was happening to her but she lied, I understand she couldn't say anything, I was the same when the police were called round the house when I was 13. I was too scared of what Steve might do, so she must have been terrified. To me that could of been detrimental to my case because if she'd spoken up then, we could have got justice sooner, I could have got justice, he would have been punished for what he did to me. Instead all we got was a police constable ringing us up explaining what a nice chap Steve was and how respected he was in the community. Cheers thanks for that, way to make me feel even more worthless. I felt guilty for thinking about myself when I should have been there for Jess but she was going to get Justice, he would be punished for what he had done to her.

A few months later myself and my mother went up to Sheffield and faced him in court, I sat there and listened to what he had done. I wasn't allowed to give evidence and was told my case had been closed. I thought it would help in some way but it did little to help control my fears.

Steve was sentenced to 17 and a half years in Jail. Justice for Jessica. I know I should of been happy for her but I felt angry and rejected all over again. Angry he was never punished for what he had done to me, my story rejected by the people who should have listened properly and done their job properly.