Baring the Timid Heart

I tried something a little different; each line has five syllables. I'm not entirely sure why I decided on five, but it ended up working perfectly for the last line. (In memory of Tony; 17 June, 2014)

It is quiet here;

You lie motionless.

I have come to give

My final farewell.

My heart is pounding;

I long to caress

Your face and curl up

Beside your still form.

Instead, I lean down

And whisper to you.

My heart cries fiercely,

"It is me, belov'd."

In comparison,

The words poured from my

Lips seem woefully

Inadequate; cheap.

As I gaze upon you,

Studying ev'ry

Infinite detail,

I finally gain

Courage to tell you

What my heart has felt.

Again, I lean down;

Drawing ever near.

I move, unhurried,

Until my face rests

Inches from your own.

With one more deep breath,

I close the small gap.

My lips touch your cheek;

Gently and with all

Form of tenderness.

You do not respond.

Yet I feel, somehow,

That you are aware.

After such time of

Tortuous ages,

I am finally

Able to bare my

Timid heart to you.

I tell you, for both

The first and last time,

"I love you so much."

Author's Note

Image by Cristel on DeviantArt

Reviews

[Edward Lancheister]

well written with good rhyme i like the flow between words into the end of poem, easily enjoyable by reader

thanks for share Elina :)

[Elina]

Thank you.

[Edward Lancheister]

your welcome

[Tate Morgan]

I am definitely in favor of the meter .As a rhyme and meter poet i recognized right away .Well done

[Elina]

Thank you.

[Tate Morgan]

My pleasure

[Johanna]

Oh this was very very sad and beautiful Elina.. a poem like this grows to mean a lot to many people, and I can tell it already means a lot to you. It is beautiful, I´m happy you wrote it

[Elina]

Thank you, very much.

[Glen Yumang Manese]

Endearment to the end of this verse...again...
those pieces that are a dedication always ring true in the finale...
and these words no matter --- if 5 syllables or many...
the idea was its for a certain someone...
but I do give you extra for the effort...

[Elina]

Thank you!

[Glen Yumang Manese]

You're welcome...remind me in an email when Chapter 10 is posted...I do check my subscriptions...but lots on my plate...

[Elina]

Of course. I totally understand. It's probably going to be a little while before I get chapter ten finished...life has been a bit chaotic, as of late.

[Glen Yumang Manese]

take your time...I know you like to put a well scripted narrative each time...hope for better days...for you...God bless...

[zainul]

Yes,it is too beautiful.
The world would miss a lot had you not shared it.
I adore your wonderful way of presenting tribute.

[Elina]

Thank you, Zainul.

[Josh Dollar]

Extreamly sad and beautiful. Tony would love it.

[Elina]

Thank you so much.

[Chris Micha]

So this was great! You have a great way with imagery here and I could see this all happening. Although sad, it rang of beautiful love. Bravo! :)

[Elina]

Thank you for the review!

[Eddie Davis]

Wow, that was beautiful and probably the saddest thing I have read here. I'm certain Tony would have loved this tribute. It is quite powerful and very unforgettable.

This is among your very best work, Elina. It is both amazing and yet sad how sometimes pain and loss can inspire the greatest works.

[Elina]

Thank you, Eddie. I'm really very happy with how it turned out. At first I wasn't sure about posting it, as it was a very personal moment, and part of me wanted to keep it to myself...my own special memory. But I thought it was too beautiful not to share.

[Eddie Davis]

You were right, it needs to be shared, and I'm glad you did.