Stupidity

A short story about a hungry fox and a narcissistic wolf.

Oh, rabbit, rabbit, you cannot escape my jaws!

Thought the fox, as he slunk through the underbrush, eyeing the plump rabbit whom was sitting a few feet away.

The wind is in my favor. Soon you will be m-

Suddenly, a shadowy form leaped from the bushes opposite and pounced upon the rabbit, tearing through its throat. The mysterious figure (it was obvious now that it was a wolf) began to eat the rabbit.

"Ho, you!" Cried the angry fox, jumping out from his hiding place. "That was MY rabbit! I saw it first!!!" 

"Hmph, now my beautiful muzzle is stained with blood! It will take days to wash it out of my lovely silver fur." Remarked the wolf, ignoring the fox.

The wolf kicked aside the remainder to the rabbit's corpse and then sat, licking his chops. This made the fox angrier and more frustrated. However, the fox kept his head.

"Why did you steal the prey that was rightfully mine?" Asked the fox.

The wolf did not reply, simply stared into a nearby puddle at his reflection, gazing, love-stricken, at his own handsome face.

"Why are you staring at your reflection as if it is your lover?"

The wolf did not reply.

"Why do you ignore me?"

Still, the wolf did not reply.

"Are you well?"

Silence.

"Hello? Earth to wolfy?"

The fox walked up to the wolf and waved a paw in front of the wolf's eyes. The wolf swatted away the fox's paw with his own and continued to stare at his reflection. Thinking of a way to snag the wolf's attention, the fox sneered and began to strut away, nose high.

"Stupidity, utter and complete stupidity! To think YOUR dull fur could match my shining locks?!? It's outrageous!" Scoffed the fox.

The wolf's head snapped up and he let out a cry of anger.

"WHAT!?!? MY HANDSOMENESS FAR SURPASSES YOUR OWN!" The wolf screeched, as he turned to face the fox.

"Finally, I have your attention. Now will you please-"

"I CHALLENGE YOU TO A BEAUTY PAGEANT!" raved the wolf.

"A what?!?"

"A beauty pageant! Now, for some judges."

The wolf disappeared into the bushes and returned with a live shrew clenched in his jaws and a depressed-looking bobcat following him.

"*SIGH*..." Sighed the bobcat.

"There will be ONE round." Stated the wolf.

"But isn't there usually MORE than one?" Asked the fox.

"Well, I'm so flawless, it'll only take one round."

"That makes no sense..."

The wolf pulled out a rose out of nowhere and positioned it behind his right ear.

"Let's do dis!"

AFTER HALF AN HOUR OF THE WOLF STRIKING POSES...

"And the winner is... the wolf, winning with an astounding 2-undecided." Squeaked the shrew.

"*Sigh* I didn't really care who won." Said the bobcat.

"HA! I told you that I am far su.. su.. perior..." The wolf's voice trailed off as he stared into another puddle at his reflection.

"That's it, I'm outta here." Said all the other creatures all at once (except for the rabbit carcass, of course)

The other animals all took off in different directions, leaving the rotting carcass and the wolf behind.

And yet, the carcass and the wolf weren't al that different from each other at the moment.

THE END

Author's Note

I want some constructive criticism on my writing, but please, no mean reviews, I'm just getting started.

Reviews

[Epipsychologist]

You've got a cool premise. The woodland creature setting is interestingly twisted with the mortality and morbidity (but I think that's cool) and this somehow makes the personifications of the animals more interesting (e.g. the narcissism of the wolf, depression of the bobcat, and moral indignation of the fox all seem kind of shallow under the lens of life and death that the rabbit carcass, repeatedly alluded to, makes salient).
This is definitely a good write. One thing I think you neglect is the comic potential in describing the pageant. At any rate I liked it.

[Silent_Wolf]

Thanks for your review! Lately I've been having the most terrible case of writer's block, but I think joining this writing site is what I needed. A little constructive criticism. After looking up a few of the words in your review to see what they meant (heh), I've got to tell you... I didn't know how to describe the pageant, that's why I skipped over it! But I think I know what to do now. I'll add it in later.

[Epipsychologist]

Cool. Good luck