Susie's Music

People are always saying “That isn’t fair.” Well, I’m sure someone always has to tell them “Life isn’t fair, deal with it!”  Sometimes it’s okay to say that, sometimes it’s the wrong time to break that cold reality to them. But the truth is, either way, ‘not fair’ is the true definition of life. And when it comes down to it, you have to realize what you have before you loose it.

 

                I was ten years old when I was introduced to music. At school I never fit in, with my long, stringy red hair, braces already even though I was in sixth grade, and old faded clothes because my parents couldn’t afford the expensive stuff. My school was one that went from kindergarten all the way to eighth grade, so there was really no escape.

 

 My only true friend was my cousin, who was far more beautiful than I was. She was already in the eighth grade, ready to spread her wings to the high school, where chasing whatever dreams you were going after started. She had long, flowing blonde hair, didn’t need braces and while he clothes were as faded and old as mine they looked good on her. She was so excited because that summer they were taking volunteers at the Art Museum, and her dream was to be an artist.

 

It was a realistic dream, she was a fantastic artist. All her paintings looked so real, she could play many different musical interments and made some of her clothes. I still had no idea what I had wanted to be when I grew up, but I thought if I followed her I would figure it out.

 

One day she and I were riding the bus to our separate homes when she brought up something I had never thought of before. Of course she would be more observant than me, but it was something most kids thought about.

 

“Abby, what exactly is your hobby?” Susie asked carefully, sitting in the seat next to me

 

“I don’t know, what’s a hobby?” I asked in response, knowing what it was but wanting to avoid the question

 

“A hobby is, well, you I guess. It’s what you like to do, what you want to spend all your time doing. Sometimes it can even be what you want to be when you grow up. So, what’s your hobby?” Susie explained to me, finishing with the same question

 

“I don’t know.” I answered shortly, already done with the conversation

 

“You don’t know? Well, what do you like to do? Do you read a lot? Play some sports a lot? Spend time on the computer? Come on Abby, what do you do?” she asked again, obviously wanting an answer

 

“Well, I mean, I don’t really do anything. I just kind of, hang around, I guess.” I answered carefully, hoping for an end

 

“Really, come on. You know you do more than that. Don’t you have a passion Abby? Something you couldn’t live with out?” Susie pressed on, not hearing my silent protest

 

                And then it hit. The one thing I couldn’t live without, besides my family, was music. I had spent a year and a half saving up my money so I could buy an I-pod. Every where I went I had it with me, and in school or on the bus it was my life. I could tune out the laughing, name calling, even the fact I had no one to talk to. Music was my life.

 

“I love music Susie.” I stated calmly

 

                That’s how it began. She took me to her house and showed me the violin. I fell in love. Then, for two years after, I played my violin, and I practiced four hours every day, and I learned music that my orchestra class hadn’t been assigned. But the best part of all of it was I would go to Susie’s house every Saturday and we would play together. Sometimes she played the piano, or the guitar, or ever the flute or cello. But usually we played a violin duo.

                When I was in eighth grade and Susie was a sophomore something amazing happened. She came over to my house and brought news that made the horrible day I had fade away and brought new spirit into me.

 

“Guess what Abby?! The high school is having an Orchestra Pop Concert and we can invite orchestra students from other schools! How would you like to be in a real concert? There’s going to be lights flashing, and the choir is going to sing and the dance class will dance! It’s gonna be so awesome, you have to come!” Susie cried, nearly trembling with excitement

 

                Of course I said yes. For three weeks I went to Susie’s house every day to practice, and I got to skip school on some days to rehearse with the high school orchestra. All the time she would say “Play your music Abby. Close your eyes and feel it.”

 

We got to stand up and play and a lot of times I would look over and there would be Susie, smiling face and dancing as she played, looking right at me. Everything was like a dream. Susie could drive because she was sixteen even though she was a sophomore. She had started school in another state. She basically drove me everywhere, and I went where ever she went. But while I was in my dream I forgot reality, until it hit me hard.

 

                Susie didn’t see the van coming down the rode. The man in the van was going seventy when the speed limit was forty. He was drunk. He didn’t see her. She thought we were going home, but in the end only I did. The last thing I saw before the van slammed us was Susie’s pale white face, slowly turning and looking at me, her face bank but her eyes filled with fear. That was the last time I saw Susie alive.

 

                Every day after that was a haze. I made it through life, day by day, still practicing and barely talking. I had stayed at the hospital for a week but I had been fine. I had lived.

 

 Before I knew what was happening the concert came, and I was there, in the middle of it. I was surrounded by dancing and singing insane high schoolers, with no Susie to turn to, no familiar smiling face of reassurance among a crowd of stranger. Tears streamed down my cheeks as I finally came to the reality. She was gone. There was nothing anyone could do but remember her.

 

I wanted to run off stage. I wanted to hide, to sit in a hole and die. But just as I turned I saw her. It wasn’t really her, more like a ghost, a memory. She was in the crowd, smiling right at me, playing a dancing. Every one around me faded away and all I could see was Susie. All sound faded away, and while the dancing memory kept on going, I heard her speak to me.

 

“Don’t you have a passion Abby? Something you couldn’t live with out?” the memory of Susie said so clearly in my mind

 

“I love music Susie.” I heard my voice say

 

“Play your music Abby. Close your eyes and feel it.” Susie said again in my mind

 

                I listened to her and closed my eyes, and for a while I was in Susie’s room, playing with her the songs we both knew by heart. I could hear her laughing, singing, and see her dancing while she tried to get me to do so too. When I opened my eyes, the memory of Susie was gone, but I was still there. Still breathing, and as the music picked up to another song my heart began to pump along with the beat.

 

 

 

Reviews

[Silent Angel]

Thank you so much for reading, and in case you didn't get my message I do give you permission to use this story. :D

[Kasey Jones]

The introduction is very effective. The entire story is very emotional and personal. It's all so perfectly worded.

Would you mind if I used this, giving you full credit of course, for an English project I have? I have to make a portfolio of pieces of literature that represent how music gives people hope. This piece is just perfect for it.