We Tread Our Thoughts

We tread our thoughts

upon the pages

in hazy summer days

gazes

along the shore.

 

We tread our thoughts

upon the pages

amongst autumn's

scarlet leaves

embraces

amidst the shimmering

sunlit glances.

 

We tread our thoughts

upon the pages

in winter's frozen

rampages

amidst the bare branched

trees.

 

We tread our thoughts

upon the pages

in spring's eager growth

as new buds come

along

the birds chirp and

hum along.

 

We tread our thoughts.

 

We tread our thoughts

upon the pages

throughout our

mighty

four seasons

with the passing of

each year.

 

 

Reviews

[Raja]

Another Nice writing. It seems that we are always thinking of the person we love, day in and day out, and that obviously passes through these four seasons. Good arrangement of words and flow of season, one by one - summer, autumn, winter, spring, and finally on pages at last.

Thank you for sharing such a magnificent work of yours.

Regards

Raja

[Edward Carr]

Good descriptive sense imagery in this poem. There are some very strong lines. I would eliminate the last stanza altogether and end with "we tread our thoughts." I would also use "on" instead of "upon" in the second line of your stanzas. Upon sounds too poetic and yeah one can sound too poetic in poetry :) I would also remove the stand alone "along" in the second to last stanza. Other than that, pretty tight writing, nearly publishable in my opinion. Needs a little revision.

[Captain Blackheart (The..]

You have a wonderful abillity to capture the imagination. Again a very well written and crafted piece. I enjoyed the going through the year as we tread our thoughts! Wonderful!

[Lalli]

the poem is fun to read, the reoccuring theme of treading thoughts upon the pages takes the reader along is timely sequence of each season, to come full circle. Good write, well done.
Great message.

i enjoyed the read

much love n respect

-Lalli

[Michael]

Hi S-

Thank you for pointing this one out to me. I like it very much. You have a nice way of guiding the reader. I do have a suggestion for you, in the first three you have constructed a one word line in the middle. It works extremely well. Think about changing the last two full stanza to match. As an example for the last:

We tread our thoughts
upon the pages
throughout the seasons
mightily
with the passing of
each year.

I might not capture the same feeling you want and make no claim to providence anyway, just wanted to give you an idea of what I was going for.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Why do we put...the seasons underfoot...inside of treasure chests...the seasons we loved best? Why not give them room... to grow or even consume... our lives in yesteryears...despite the pain and tears...focus on the daffodils asnd spring...and all the new life that each season brings.

[Blue Sky]

Flowing with great imagery
and you've penned another beautiful treading piece
that will walk upon the fields of my heart!
Beautiful images come alive with each season
like herbs to the bland menu!
Wonderful writing!!

[Carole]

Another catchy title! "We Tread Our Thoughts!" Autumn is not as pretty here in the desert though there are a few favorite spots that time of year. A beautiful poem.

One typo which I am sure you have already noticed. Second stanza-take the "n" out of autumn. Amazing write as always, my friend.

Blessings, Carole

[Justin Tobey]

I like the fluidity of the piece in the seasonal cycle. The whole piece created an ethereal, dream-like state of mind for me that I really enjoyed. As always, good job. :)

[Legion]

Tread on. I really like this. Great imagery. The idea of the constant continuation with this is very captivating. Kind of like the old addage "the show must go on" in a way. Great write.