Paths Crossed

Paths Crossed

A Poem by Siddartha Beth Pierce

When upon the summer breeze

you dropped me to my knees

as you came to me in vision

clad in black leather

we danced amidst the heather

as my heart did leap

skip a beat

for this One that I did meet.

 

Whether together or apart you see

we are United as One

in our love for life,

learning, teaching,

discerning

the Truth from that

which escapes most.

 

Best of luck dear in

your travels

may you go a million miles

into the Universal bliss

of Understanding.

 

As I sit here

and ponder once again

upon these pages

about how it is most

fortunate

that our paths once crossed.

 

 

© 2008 Siddartha Beth Pierce


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Featured Review

As I sit here

ponder once again

upon this page

how fortunate

that our paths once crossed.

hey here is a small opinion that i think is not too brutal. as you see i rewrote the last stanza and fell it has too many words that need not be there if you look at the rest of the poem you can see there is quitwe a few that could be taken out and your poem would be given a deeper meaning. just some advice. but i like how and where it is going well done!





Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I'm doing this in parts:

The opening was great and I was bouncing around on the rhythms. But it withered as I got here:

as my heart did leap
skip a beat
for this One that I did meet.

It takes a different road from thee on, and although the sentiment is a wonderful things in itself, I think you could study your opening and either dilute it to reduce the abrupt transition in beat, or you could work on the rest and really give us a show. Otherwise, Beth (Sorry, I love that name and just wanted to write it), it is not the best I have read from you, but has energy behind it willing people goodness...and that is always a pleasure to feel as a reader.

My favorite were the first two opening lines:

When upon the summer breeze

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

How sweet � to enjoy the happy memories instead of wining about loneliness.

This poem reflects true love and not a drop of egoism � because you wish him all the best, even if he is not at your side�

A.M.


Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AMEN! Fortunate is a fine way to describe those that have "crossed our paths", left an impression, and journied onward. What a fabulous poem!! Thanks for sharing it with the Cafe!!
Sallie Bear

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Beautifully done. I really like the feelings of love and a sort of ethereal bliss that you've created. This one's going in my favorites. Thanks for sharing!

Blessed Be!
Justin

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

"Whether together or apart you see

we are United as One"

Wonderfully said! I like the poem, its breaking into stanzas like a flowing water without even letting us think that we are reading. It seems like a tune waltzed through my next door, such familiarity it has!!

Regards

Raja


Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

As I sit here

ponder once again

upon this page

how fortunate

that our paths once crossed.

hey here is a small opinion that i think is not too brutal. as you see i rewrote the last stanza and fell it has too many words that need not be there if you look at the rest of the poem you can see there is quitwe a few that could be taken out and your poem would be given a deeper meaning. just some advice. but i like how and where it is going well done!





Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

I totally agree with Antonio's comment.

The person that you are writing about in this delightful poem sounds like quite something else.

The following lines I find particularly vivid in the imagery that they evoke: "may you go a million miles
into the Universal bliss of Understanding."

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

You're beautiful you know that?

Rich

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.


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Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on June 15, 2008

Author

Siddartha Beth Pierce
Siddartha Beth Pierce

Richmond, VA



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Artist, Poet, Educator, African and Contemporary Art Historian more..

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