The Sleepwalker

I wrote as a homework assignment for English. We had to write a poem linked to why someone would be driven to kill and how they would do it.

 

You wake in blood, you smell unclean,

You remember her cry, her desperate scream,

Your eyes were wild; your anger did grow,

Your childhood friend is dead you know.

 

Sleepwalking soul, you held that knife,

And with it you consumed her life,

Her spirit is gone, her heart you ripped out,

Were you really asleep? You’re drowning in doubt.

 

You told her the truth, your love, you confessed,

You thought she’d respond, you thought you were blessed,

But you argued and fought, it just wasn’t the same,

And now you’re the only one left who’s to blame.

 

Upon entering her room in your sleepwalkers phase,

Your eyes were aglow; your heart was ablaze,

A blackened soul when gone was the light,

Your subconscious was strong, it won out the fight.

 

She heard your steps; she woke with a shriek,

But you were too strong and she was too weak,

The struggle was quick, the struggle was slow,

Whether you meant it you’ll never know.

 

You sit and you rock yourself back and fro,

You’re crying with grief, your mind cries out more!

Were you always this evil? Were you always so vain?

You don’t know it yet but you’re going insane!

 

Young man you are wounded, you did something wrong,

You couldn’t have helped it; your mind is so strong,

Your heart is in rage, you pathetically pine,

You pick up the phone, you dial, nine, nine, nine!

 

I’m no better than thousands of others, you say,

I’ll be sure to pay for my crime today.

I murdered the girl I loved so well,

One day I hope I go to hell!

Author's Note

What do you think??? Is it alright for an English assignment???

Reviews

[Arthur Crow]

This is a gripping read, the pace is fast, helped by your constant rhyme. The elements are dynamic and the expression comes through with conviction. Quite a good poem! :)