Vampires Crush

Vampires Crush

A Book by ThoughtsofShyann
"

After a beautiful girl named Rosyln falls for a immortal she gets more than what she bargained for. In a tempt to find out more about the Daavole family she. Finds out more about herself. Then forever

"

© 2013 ThoughtsofShyann


Author's Note

ThoughtsofShyann
Might have errors, give me true feed back!

My Review

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Featured Review

True feedback... Okay...
First... goodjob for putting your ideas to paper and sharing them.
Second... These chapters should be broken into paragraphs, especially when ever a new person speaks.
Third... Alot of grammer issues...I would suggest reading it aloud to another person. As many of the issues are in sentence continuity and sentence format... You should be able to catch most of it that way.
Fourth... Don't give up on it... Evolve your characters more, more description would be helpful and because it's vampires... You gotta make your vampire more interesting than everybody elses.

Thanks for sharing your ink!
Aaron - Wolfwind


Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

True feedback... Okay...
First... goodjob for putting your ideas to paper and sharing them.
Second... These chapters should be broken into paragraphs, especially when ever a new person speaks.
Third... Alot of grammer issues...I would suggest reading it aloud to another person. As many of the issues are in sentence continuity and sentence format... You should be able to catch most of it that way.
Fourth... Don't give up on it... Evolve your characters more, more description would be helpful and because it's vampires... You gotta make your vampire more interesting than everybody elses.

Thanks for sharing your ink!
Aaron - Wolfwind


Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on July 27, 2013
Last Updated on September 28, 2013

Author

ThoughtsofShyann
ThoughtsofShyann

CA



About
I just always loved writing so I decided to just write about my dreams and thoughts! My name is Shyann as you can tell. I enjoy fiction mystery and Romance. I will try to do as many books as my mind w.. more..

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