Controlling emotions.

Nothing makes me feel the chaos and the silence at the same time.
Not the way you do.
The chaos is all the bad you make me fiend for. The things that make me feel so alive.
But quieting my brain enough that I can form a clear thought. And when I did, all I thought about was you.
You'd probably say that's a lie.
And I'm so slightly indecisive with my words because I can't handle the commotion.
Its the feelings hitting us like cars, knowing we have to feel them.
All I wanted was to feel nothing. But now you've turned this into something. Something I can't handle.
Then you shut it down by a desire to feel alone. Tell everyone you don't need it.
Everyone just wants to be alone because when you're alone you have at least a little control.
I'll justify the way I am with invalid excuses and feelings I put away years ago and still haven't taken them back out. There just sitting somewhere on a shelf. I've managed to lose them along with my heart. This is a deep sorrow I've carried for so long, being unwanted for so long.
Truth be told, no one wants to feel unwanted. But sometimes its better to feel nothing, its the only thing you can control.

Reviews

[Writer at last! Sky ~]

The best way to control the emotions is to be "senseless" like your last lines says, But sometimes its better to feel nothing, its the only thing you can control.
It's really hard but it happens with time and real life experiences.