I impersonate a relative of mine, who is not with her lover any more. She keeps suspecting him for everything imaginable in this world. The hidden reason being that she expects he is still thinking about her.
I hope I did justice to female emotions and way of expression.
Speak your heart out.
My Review
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Fantastic,
Simple in wording but grasps through a diverse repetition the many ways he was influencing her, whether it be real or imagined. It also left me to ponder if she were still thinking of him and therefore the seasons bore his absence in her life. Either way great piece.
Chris
100/100
A fascinating piece that can go any number of ways mood-wise: witty, bitter, and so on...has a song-like quality to it as well...nicely done.
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
Thank you so much! And yes! I had a music going in my brain when i wrote this. So effect is visible... read moreThank you so much! And yes! I had a music going in my brain when i wrote this. So effect is visible. :)
Wow! I like this one, sounds lyrical also. That's what I usually do, Shivam. When I have nothing to tell about myself for the moment, my muse or my concept is other people's experiences. I put my feet into their shoes and feel their emotions like mine.
Glad you made justice in doing it here. You're so good. Keep it up!
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
That's the sign of a real poet. One should not be selfish enough to express only his own but also in.. read moreThat's the sign of a real poet. One should not be selfish enough to express only his own but also invade others' emotional globe. Thanks a lot great poet :)
Hey Shivam,....
Your "In Your Thoughts",is wonderful,......contains lots of fells and emotions.
Really pleased by your writing piece, i hope you may excell more in this sphere.
A powerful and close impersonation of the female emotions as well as the attitudes...I like how you uses seasonal elements to show the changes about them...
Wonderful...:)
Relationships fail - life goes on - but when something goes wrong it's easier to blame it on the ex - who knows it may be his fault it rained... I'm sure I've blamed it on my ex.
Shivam ... how are you doing? This is a different take on your usual surely ... getting in touch with your feminine side then. I figure its okay for a first time effort ... but you realize that it also shows your male attitude regarding her?
Its a practice of abstract expression when we speak in the mind and words of someone else. The applications are quite enormous ... you may want to probe it further. Nice write.
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
I tried to tone down the male attitude as much as I could. But you know she has been doing this. For.. read moreI tried to tone down the male attitude as much as I could. But you know she has been doing this. For years she has been blaming her lover for silliest of all things. Once it got just too hilarious and I ended up writing this.
And I agree, I would probe it further. Thanks Daryan :)
BTW, I had impersonated once before too. It was in my first romantic poem - I Will Love You. But I had impersonated a male friend of mine, so I guess I was more accurate. Still learning :)
Shivam Murari is a student, currently aspiring to get into a good college. He loves to write poems, loads of them. He usually gets very random ideas, which he thinks are pretty cool, and in the proces.. more..