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This poem attempts to taunt the people who impose forced discipline and on those who believe in hollow fame and fake brotherhood!

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Sun revolves around the Earth,

Isn’t that a curious phenomenon?

There are rules and laws since I’ve taken birth

You have to follow, you can’t run.

 

Within my mother’s womb, as a foetus

I floated from one wall to another.

Now the entwining rules eat us

The prodigious list only grows longer.

 

For the brotherhood is neither meringue

Nor the notes of a mezzo

Where has the love gone, I rue,

Locate it, I’ll find the boat to row.

 

There can be no discipline, no love,

Until the conscience strikes

It would neither come from twitter followers,

Nor from facebook likes!

 

Author's Note

This poem co-relates the forced discipline, which loosens as soon as the forcing agent goes absent, and the absence of true love, which is also in forced form! I think both the love and discipline are co-related in this manner that they have to imbibe in us and not just adsorb!

Reviews

[Saumya]

This was a completely different poem from what i had read before..:)
i was firstly excited to see the topic, and reading it proved it to be a really wonderful opportunity...
like the distinctive subject, the poem also is great...:) i completely agree with all your thoughts displayed here...
the beginning was great, i completely enjoyed reading the entire piece:)
well done:)

[Shivam Murari]

Thank you so much Saumya :)

[Prritiy]

rightly said

There can be no discipline, no love,
Until the conscience strikes

nice thoughtful composition.

best wishes

[Femi Adejuwon]

LOL I like this. Straight to the point. Good light reading.

[Shivam Murari]

Thank you Femi :)

[SHEEMA HUQ]

An excellent rhyme scheme and a very interesting piece to read, very well done!

[Shivam Murari]

Thanks a lot Sheema :)

[Gaurav Walia]

Within my mother’s womb, as a foetus
I floated from one wall to another.
Now the entwining rules eat us
The prodigious list only grows longer.

My favorite part. Very-well written piece i must say.. KUDOS!, man

[Shivam Murari]

Thank you so much Gaurav :)

[Vikrantsingh]

Well I hardly like anyones comment or pictures on FB. I hardly visit Twitter, I mostly visit WC and my work..
However, the message here which you share its very serious. Infact, if you like or follow their tweets or comments on facebook or Twitter respectively they will like and follow back. Else they will ignore your post " Isne mere post like nahi kiya why should I like his/her's?"
this shows mean and selfishness.. If you like something and that is really meaningful it must/should appreciated at that instant.
But.. But we are human - We like people if they praise us. Else ignore him/her.
Lol and we call that socal follow-up.
Eg: Aaj maine tere 3 post pe like kiya - Tu bhi mere 3 post pe like kar? this is what they ask me to do.
I moved out of all this FALSE Relationship.
Wonderfully narrated my friend loved it single word of it was worth to read and understand here.
Thanks for the invite :)
-Singh :)

[Shivam Murari]

Thank you so much Vikrant, for that detailed reflection and expression. I totally agree with what you speak. I-liked-you-post-so-that-you-like-mine is such a disgusting thinking among people! That is why i maintain a distance from FB!
Thanks a lot! :)

[Vikrantsingh]

Same here :)

[carol burgess romance]

hummmm very interesting write....I detest like buttons...but I like your poem

[Shivam Murari]

Thank you so much carol :)

[Muse]

ha ha, this was cute. I'm starting to believe that we want to be stalked by our own paparazzi?

[Shivam Murari]

That is so ture :D haha! Thank you :)

[Dakshta]

that's a really nice write with really awesome message... keep up the good work Shivam :)

[Shivam Murari]

Thank you so much Dakshta! :)

[Rajat Chandra]

Awesomely composed! Quite witty with a nice message :)

[Shivam Murari]

Thanks a lot Rajat ^_^