pitiful seeds: licking wounds with blame on our hands

Inspired by Sami Khalil's "Wounded Generations" Thank you for the motivation Sam.

would it be the transgression

of a sovereign POET

the great PROVIDER of night and day

who conjured up sea brought forth the wild beast

with sun moon and his sister stars

unprecedented symmetry fashion and make

when human images created to remain

in the first garden Eden chose to forsake

assigning animals on land sailing the skies

first man first woman perfect sexes

was it not they and their declining progression

(stop paradise ya'll...for they've opted for gratuitous decay)

 

that we live only to die

we ungrateful... offspring write the demons

against the infinite author of scripture and passage

sewn from communities to nations to masses

erected technology to detriment and gain

while greed overcomes us at expense

of destitute souls

giving no concern to the tired and weak

for exorbitance of mint paper that barters like gold

march to their death coming of age youth to expire as men

in wars we have no reasonable explanations for

earth and nature's betrayal is poetic justice

rains on us acid as we corrupt surplus

food and sustenance we incinerate while

the hole in hunger and ozone is neglected gaping

aimed armed and ready to destroy fellow man

with rampant hate

licking our wounds never accepting

as culprits

unworthy prodigy we are to negate blame

Reviews

[Lloyd Frieson-Small]

I love the extensive vocabulary in this one. The raw expression of your observations are marvelous. Though, your punctuation and flow of this work needs, not training, but discipline. A very good read and hope to see more, but there is room for progression.

[Shirlena]

Thank you so much but I've been writing a long time and my muse decides my flow which is not meant to be a cookie cutter's version of flowing and, not saying that I don't learn something new everyday but my writing has continued to progress...it is my nature. I do thank you for reading and the attempt at constructive criticism.

[Claire in VA]

HOW TRUE.
You expressed your thoughts on this extremely well.
Great job!

[Shirlena]

Thank you Claire, look forward to reading something of yours. Please be patient cause I will get there.

[Angela L Garratt]

This is a brilliant write and one I enjoyed very much. There is a lot of truth in this poem. The next time I see children, no older than thirteen/fourteen standing on a street corner smoking cigarettes and shouting obscenities at the elderly or in turn, watching how an elderly person throws her sweet wrappers on the ground without bothering to find a bin. The next t time I hear something on the TV about the war in the middle east, I will remember this poem and tell others how right you are. Thank you for penning such a powerful write, and maybe we, as human beings can learn from poems such as this.

[Shirlena]

Thank you Angela, I am so much looking forward to reading something of yours. I am sorry for the belated response, hopefully I will get around to reading your work sooner than this.

[m.s.early]

You have articulated the demise of the human experience. Blindly we exploit and extort what paradise we were granted. We ransom our blessings without realizing what was ransomed for us. Great read.

[Shirlena]

Thank you so much Xavier. I honestly had no idea this poem would get the attention it got so your words are really appreciated and I'm itching to read your brand of artistry.

[m.s.early]

Itch no longer dear poet :)

[Shirlena]

HA...that was cute.

[Praveeta]

Beautiful portrayal of truth. The activities of mankind and its negative impacts on the ecosystem.

[Shirlena]

Thank you so much Praveeta. I hope to be reading something of yours soon.

[Praveeta]

You are welcome.

[Daniel Dawes]

Cool, Really enjoyed the whole piece and wouldn't change a thing....... Well done good write :)

[Shirlena]

Appreciate the kindness Daniel. I intend to return the favor.

[cycy]

"earth and nature's betrayal is poetic justice
rains on us acid as we corrupt surplus"
well written dear shows that you really thought this one through and it speaks truth hey. lovely poem indeed, well done :)

[Shirlena]

I always try to be honest cycy...it's not welcomed always but I do anyway. I'm happy that you found some good in this poem. Thank you.

[Brittany Zedalis]

This is a truly brilliant piece. Great job.

[Shirlena]

Thanks a lot for reading Brittany.

[Linda alexander]

food and sustenance we incinerate while
the hole in hunger and ozone is neglected gaping
aimed armed and ready to destroy fellow man
with rampant hate
Really great write, proud of the poet for touching multiple areas which is extremely important, some areas if we are smart, can make a plethora of positive changes, wars, food waste some times can be even looked up as universal wastage, as if you are stealing some one's food by wasting it, I try most of the time not to waste food, I know few people way keener than me, turning of electricity when not needed, considering any one's property as your own especially at work place, so many areas, really enjoyed

[Shirlena]

Hey now, you could make this lovely commentary a poem Linda...I enjoyed and relish in your words. Thank you I'll be dropping by your spot soon.

[Linda alexander]

World is in downward spiral for sure, ironically it held me strong me like an monster octopus towards it, when I see the most talented thinkers in cafe, I am holding my last brain cell for the world, hey, something better than nothing , so we all can or should contribute, you seemed like a keen and astute thinker

[Shirlena]

Me thinks too much often times :). Thank you.

[Linda alexander]

You most welcome, take care, smile always if you can

[Leigh]

A very good Earth rant, you cover a multitude of relevant issues, if only we could solve but one

[Shirlena]

Thank you so much Leigh for reading this piece and for the generous words...if only indeed :).

[Shirlena]

I try Leigh thank you but my thanks also goes to Sam who is one of my greatest inspirations here.

[Leigh]

You are very welcome