A Eulogy For Me, By Me

A Eulogy For Me, By Me

I often wonder what people will say about me at my funeral. Not because I anticipate it to be anytime soon but because I wonder about my legacy, about what I am leaving behind and how I will be remembered.

Will they talk about what I did for a living? How I earned a monthly paycheck? Will they talk about my social status, whether I succeeded or failed to conform to societal demands? Had I swam upstream or flowed passively along with those around me? Will they mention my failures, the times I fell? Will I be remembered for my academic achievements? By my car? My house?

I am not in control of the perception of others. However, I am in control of my actions, my capacity to influence others and how I choose to live my life and if I choose to live as a model and an example for those around me.

If it were me writing my own eulogy, I’d write not about what I did but how I did it. Did I do it lovingly? Was I compassionate? Did I invest wholly into all I did and all the relationships around me? Did I tell my family just how much I loved them? Did I connect with strangers, treat everyone fairly and kindly? Did I extend myself for the needs of another? Did I do so with grace? Did I show empathy and remorse?

I want to be remembered in a way that people feel inspired by my life, where people vow to be more, to try more, because of me. I want to leave a group of people behind who commit to leading more connected, wholesome lives in tribute of how I lived mine. I want to be remembered not for my failings or the times I stumbled, but for the times I picked myself up afterward. I want someone to do an act of kindness and say, “this is something she would have done.” I want to be a benchmark, an aspiration, not because I need glory or recognition, but rather because then their actions would act as testimony for the meaningful life I lead. I pray for strength and courage to be able to lead a life worth aspiring toward, a life that will affect those around me.

So instead of wondering about my funeral and spending time guessing what my eulogy would be like, I’d rather invest time into working on myself, building myself, on giving, sharing and loving. After all, legacies don’t just happen. Legacies are created.