Just One Moment

The night before we had to put my grandfather in a live-in program. We tried everything else. This was the beginning of the end.

We went to dinner,

as usual.

We were driving home,

nothing out of the ordinary.

Send in the Clowns was playing.

The three of us had tears in our eyes,

you didn't know.

It was your last night of life.

It was your last night of freedom,

your last night of dignity.

You didn't yet know that it was all over.

My heart was breaking for you.

You sang the words,

able to remember each one,

even though you remembered so much less of everything else.

Your mind had been taken from you,

you were no longer that man,

the one that you had once been.

I wanted you back,

I wanted one more moment of sanity,

not just for you, but for me.  

And all these years later, all I still ask for,

is that one moment of sanity.

Send in the clowns.