Opening Poem Can You Hear

Can You Hear

 

 

Can you hear the soft whispers of the wind in the trees?

Or the soft stillness of the grass?

 

Can you hear the rustling of the soft rustling of leaves as they move down the street?

Or the stillness of nothing as they lay beneath your feet?

 

Can you hear the soft heart beat as you walk cross the path?

Or the stillness of nothing as you walked that forgotten path?

 

Can you hear the coldness as it surrounds you?

Or taste the fear of death that invites you?

 

Can hear and see the darkness that waits as it creeps long the path?

Or do you wait for it, hoping that it will pass you by?

 

Can you hear the silenced screams in the wind, the silent whispers?

Or is right behind you walking down the path?

 

I can for I am Death and hear you and wait as you turn around 

Nor do I wait for you to listen as I wait for you to scream.

 

 It is not the cold you feel but my fingers around you.

It is my footprints you can not hear as I stand behind you.

 

I hear your heart, it cries out to me not in fear. It bids me welcome.

The whispers are silent as my breath blows the leaves and trees.

I walk the path beside you gladly because you could not hear me.

 

Now can hear me?

Or do you scream...    

Reviews

[...]

I like this precise form and clean style. Words are like symbolic dreams to.make reader more wonder. Ponder. It's gentle and also very energetic and yes I enjoyed that scream on the end.

[Shep]

i am thinking of using this one as the opening of my book coming of the storm not sure yet

[Lina Grey]

I like the imagery and the gentleness of this. I hardly noticed how dark it turned because the change was so subtle, like nightfall. The ending is a powerful punch. Well done.

[Sleepless]

wel the poem is really brilliant i like it !!! :P next xhpter !:)

[M Garcia]

Moving.

[CrimsonBlaze]

I have to say, starting a book with a poem really hooks them up. The poemnwas unique, challenging readers to read on to find the meaning in its words.

[Samuel Dickens]

Not knowing the nature or subject of the story that this poem introduces, I won't try to form an interpretation. Some editing for missing words, extra words, and punctuation is needed, but nothing too serious. Overall, it's good, solid writing.

[Wendy Seames Garner]

This poem started out so sweetly, then turned so evil. Gives me a little shiver, wondering what your book is about.

"Can you hear the silenced screams in the wind, the silent whispers?
Or is right behind you walking down the path?"
Something about this stanza was confusing to me at first, I had to reread it.

Well thought out poem.

[Coyote Poetry]

A very strong opening to this story. Poem started off easy then became direct and honest. I had to read the poem a few times for pleasure. I like the many strong questions. A very good ending to a powerful poem.
Coyote