Odds & Ends part 2

Chapter 57-1

Odds & Ends

Part 2

 

Scouting moved quickly after grandma gave me my sash that contained all my merit badges and awards. Brother Nile's kept his word regarding me earning my Eagle. I only lacked seven merit badges and an Eagle service project; which took me three months to complete, after I had earned all my merit badges and couple more for good measure.

I had chosen to build a scout library that contained every merit badge book that was listed and few guides and handbooks for the scout leaders; something that was really lacking in our ward and Stake. You would think that would be easy just to buy a few books and a nice box to put them in. Trust me if that was all I had to do. I could have done it in a heartbeat. Considering I had enough money from doing odd jobs or grandma could have gone with me to the bank and helped me withdraw it from my personal savings.

It was required that I had to raise the funds on my own doing a service project and with the help of my troop, to obtain the goal and put in the time that it required which was a minim of 80 hours. The amount was about 500.00 dollars to purchase everything I would need to make that goal. I had earned my trust with Mom and Dad because I have never tried to run away. Dad didn’t bother about replacing the watch after it was cut off during my last stay in the hospital.

Instead, Dad and Mom took the chance as I walked up down every street known to man in American Fork, Highland and Lehi alone and to be picked up at the designated location at a certain given time or there would be consequences and be considered a runaway and never trusted again. I would spend two hours a day selling anywhere too bake goods too Savanna light bulbs to raise the money. I walked countless miles over three months until I had reached that goal, and I did it mostly by myself until the very end when I had sold ten cases of light bulbs and hand delivered them with the help of my troop.

It was one of the happiest days when the day came to pin that badge on me after years of disappointments and delays because of the lack of care in scouting. Instead of giving a pin to my parents, even though they were invited they didn’t show up for that big day. Mom, Dad, and my Grandmother stood in for them to accept that great honor that I had worked years to receive. I was given several honors, having my picture taken in the local newspaper and a plaque that would hang with the other 12 boys that had achieved theirs in our ward and our stake.

I was also given a special banquet to give a speech in regards to scouting in my life. It took me nearly a week to write it and practice it in front of the mirror and the Rothwell’s until it was perfect. It was also one of the longest speeches I had ever given at the time.

Brother Nile's presented me a totem staff he had hand carved and stained himself to mark me as part of his troop and best friend to immortalize the occasion. I still have it in my room, where I can look at it every day. It and the picture that was taken when it was given and my sash with all my pins and badges is the only thing that I was able to keep that my father didn’t dare burn. I was also the only one in our family that achieved that award. Not even my own father achieved it and far as I know none of my cousins or uncles hadn’t either.

Shawn and his friends had dropped out of scouting long before I had received my award. Shane stayed on as a leader and I helped other boys achieve theirs, which was another sore point when it comes to Shawn, Kelly and their friends. Mom and Dad said it was jealousy at the time, but in the history of the Rothwell’s I was the only foster kid that had achieved it and they were more than proud to wear the pin. I did purchase extra to give to my parents, but to this day they never wore it.

By the time the school year was finished and I completed the 8th grade for the second time. Mom and Dad had made a change regarding if I would attend summer school. My grades were outstanding even though I had taken off school either for punishment or injuries. They had determined that it wasn’t necessary, but Arthur, Kelly, and Shawn, on the other hand, weren’t that lucky. I am not saying I had it easier than them, I was almost twice as busy and had plenty to do to keep me occupied.  Like I had mentioned earlier Dad had loaned Shane and me out as ranch hands, which nearly took most of our time. Kerry was busy with the dating scene and working to help pay for college; which meant Mom had to find me a new piano teacher.

Dad was also working me hard with sports like baseball, wrestling, swimming, and kickboxing as well as gymnastics. Plus other things that kept me out of the kitchen as much as possible. Yet as always the State just refuses to leave me be. With that rotating door of new caseworkers making it number 6 and the summer had just begun. Every time Dad and Mom said no to my caseworker regarding a home visit the more they pushed for them; having to explain over and over to those stupid “Ding Bats” why it not such a good idea. Only to come back stating they had arranged one and would be picking me up to spend a weekend with my parents.

It took every fiber in Dad and Mom to stay calm and keep that monster locked inside as they argued about it. In the end, we lost stating once again my parents had changed and had been working on their anger issues. How many times does it take for those “Ding Bats” to realize that was never going to happen before they ended up killing me?

Mom and Dad trusted me, well let’s say they trusted me more than Kelly not to run away. But they did not trust my parents and no convincing was ever going to change that. The Ding Bat was against children wearing monitoring devices unless they are hardening criminals like Kelly. Which he had a bigger chance of being in prison by the time he was 18. I, on the other hand, I was not.

In fact, I was the one pleading with Dad to put the watch on me and it would be secret that only Mom, Dad, and Grandma would know. Dad heisted making sure that it was what I really wanted. Even though I was shaking inside with complete terror; I needed to know if I could stand up to my parents. Dad agreed to one full day, but I better be returned the very next day in pristine condition no later than 1 pm. Or he would be down there faster than a locomotive with guns a blazing. Even though there were no guns in the house, I knew Dad could inquire one without much trouble.

Dad and Mom drove me up there where my parents lived and where the church house was; including the road up Santaquin Canyon. Dad marked the map at each location where my parents had taken me to hide so they could beat the living crap out me for days and weeks without causing suspicion.

Dad called into his buddies on the police force and gave them every location where to look if my signal on my watch was either disconnected or it went to any of those places; basically dropping a net around Santaquin. My new watch had a new feature, that all I had to do was press a button three times within three minutes if I was in danger and a whole swat of police cars would surround me in mater of minutes; terminating my visit until Hell Lake froze over, that and if they find one mark that shouldn’t be there.

Dad did try to get the Ding Bat to authorize a search of my person but said I wasn’t a criminal that required such rough treatment, saying. “Mr. and Mrs. Rothwell it’s not like their going to beat their own child, you are just being overprotected.”   Dad lost it asking him if had read my file and took a good look at the pictures of the injuries that I had sustain under their care.

He quickly said. “Yes, but I consider them mostly fictional, what kind of parent would do that to their own child. I have seen dozens of cases where children had these types of injuries and most of them were self-inflicted. Even the last report stated that Eric had done those himself, which landed him in the hospital. And you and your wife stated that you have witnessed it and numerous occasions that these recent injuries were self-inflicted.”

Dad growled. “Have you seen an outright panic attack where anyone like Eric is totally consumed by a terror that brings on whole new experiences what can happen when they consumed by awaking dream. Have you spoken with his psychologist stating that he is not himself or insane beyond seeing nothing, but a PTSD flashback reliving a real experience that actually happened?”

The Ding Bat looked at the file and placed it back into his briefcase said. “If that was the case, he would be living in mental intuition, not living a normal life in foster care. PTSD is just another excuse that is so new to science and Psychologist producing ridicules findings that it is hard to believe a 14-year old boy would suffering from such grander of a false realism as to gain attention and sympathy from others. I hardly believe that his parents would put him in real danger. Good day and I will pick him on Thursday.”

Dad had to go outside and take a long walk and worked out lifting weights to burn off the anger before he punched his fist through a wall. Realizing I had two days before I came face to face with my biggest fear. Dad decided that a quick workout at the Gym would do us both good. Considering for me, he was my biggest monster of them all; but today he was my Dad and I was his son. We quickly warmed up doing drills before we actually put on the glove and protected gear.

He wanted me to use every trick I had in my arsenal before I came faces to face with my parents. First, we did it fully dressed so if that element came true I would be more than ready. He had someone set the timer to see how fast I could shed my outer skin and escape. We did it over and over until I was standing in my boxers or gym shorts until it was under 10 minutes. If it was more then 15 I was counted as dead and we would begin again. Then we worked on kickboxing and how to take my father out quickly and effectively. He was careful not to bruises me more than necessary making it as real as possible. He would use rope and try to tie me showing me the best ways to escape it before I was incapacitated and unable to move.

He would use his belt so I could predict each movement by body language.  Having it catch and wrap around my arms and waist. Using my body to draw him in closer so I could punch him closing the space between us; l learned two swipe moves and that would take my opponent out and my favorite was to flip him over my shoulder using my momentum and speed to take down a bigger monster that weighs more than I do without injuring myself.

He taught me how to take the breath out of someone using my fist, fingers, and feet. A technique intimate uses when fighting dirty. We did them over and over until I had them down pat. It was after nine before we showered and changed into our street clothes. Dad and I had missed super at home so we stopped and had the biggest unhealthiest hamburger we could find and tons of French Fries and two large chocolate shakes.

It was one the best nights I had with Dad, and more educational then I had learned in a long time. I wanted to make him proud, but I also was hoping it wouldn’t come to that. Dad made me promise that I would never use what I learned to hurt another human being unless my life was in danger. He knew I wouldn’t break it. I had earned his complete trust when came to promises.

For the first time in a long time I didn’t scream in terror as I dreamed I was with my father in the church basement. Instead, I focused on changing the dream using what I had learned over the past few months. Shane held me in his arms as I fought my demons. Earning him a black eye and a split lip until I realized it was Shane and not my father; quickly fell back to sleep without needing to be tranquilized.

I dreamed I was the tiger and I was hunting my parents.  I would roar real loud repeating my new phrase. I am the Tiger with seven stripes; when I roar prepare to fight. My strips are my weapons they are my courage. Hear me roar. ” Shane would answer “Tiger roars for he fears nothing. Who is the Tiger and what color is his stripes?” If I answer no color then I am trouble. If say black I am safe. I would answer “I am Tiger I have seven black strips and a roar because I am Tiger the fearless.”

If I don’t I would be tranquilized until I wake and answer the correct phrase. If I don’t after that I would be tranquilized again so Shane or Dad can strap me down to my bed. Until repeat the correct phrase. It’s complicated for reason, for my mind to understand that. My parents are not in the room and they do not know the proper response. Meaning if that happens I am in trouble. It’s not real, it’s not real is not the correct response. In that case, I needed to fight to escape and kill is my last resort.