Enduring Ever Onward

Today

I am sad.

Tears burn at the edge

And I fight for control.

My loss,

Though it was, perhaps,

Of my own construction

And wrought in the

Hidden corners of my mind

It is still

My loss.

I won’t speak of it

Or inform others how it pains me

Forcing my throat to

Hold back its cries

Of devastation,

Commanding my eyes to

Cling to the unshed tears I

Am afraid to let fall,

And instructing my mind

To forget its pained memories,

Pray my heart to be unshaken from

Such pain and torment, all

While attempting to

Smile, to laugh

And most of all to withhold and suppress

The truths it conceals within

Its folds and crevices.

It hurts,

Inside I am screaming, crying,

In hysterics,

Because it hurts so bad,

This secret of mine.

Let me divulge

It, I beg you

And allow me to unburden

My burdened heart.

But no, you must always refuse

Me this aid, this

Respite from unending aching

For if I should release

My mindful of mystery

I should disrupt all that is

Logical in my life.

I am crazy with desperation, with

Anguish, but always I have borne

It, and always will I endure.

Be strong, my weakening mentality

And someday relief

May present itself.

How I will hope for such

Liberation.