GONE

                                                             

                          

             

       reality filters through the heavily draped window

  light finds a way in to chase a phantom's glow

luminosity dances and dodges free to play

begging and urging the spark to stay

gloom takes a turn unable to smother the rays

illumination diverts the dark fabric as a seamstress at sew

creating long strings of floating light in tow

controlling rogue leashes anchored to the floor

obscurity claims the airy bright collar for jaws that devour

sitting vacant, seeking, craving, display wants something to show

a chair is just a chair or the end of a row

the ease next to me now leans empty of your grace

a place lost in time's erase

 the pictures are put away

words never spoken hide with the stray

beyond the phantoms movement I find

a point I often sharpen to curse time

for destroying what was mine

one word dares and stays despite

flies an defies divine 

a single syllable left benign

GONE

Terry D’Arcy-Ryan

Author's Note

This piece is a turning point in grief for me. After a time you are ready to put away her things, yesterday was too soon. Every detail surrounding me is on sensory overload. I look for her everywhere, coming around the corner or flying through the front door, but she is gone.The phantom's only I see them, hope to see, she still talks to me and she is everything I miss. There is nothing really there but my ghost of a daughter.
If your still reading thank you and God Bless.

Reviews

[Joel Crow]

The image this conjures is certainly exceptional, though I must admit that much of the meaning remains cryptic to me, but perhaps that is the intention. Overall I get the message that darkness must give way to inevitable light, even though the pain remains of something, or likely someone, who is gone. If cryptic is your intention, it can be very effective, but if you wish for greater clarity I would suggest possibly punctuating sentences where they are complete.
Also slight possible type-o's. Line 2: Phantom's
Line 13: time's erase ?
Line 16 phantom's movement ?
Or is the missing possessive apostrophe intentional throughout the poem, as in keeping with the loss of belonging?

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

This piece is a turning point in grief for me. After a time you are ready to put away her things yesterday was too soon. Every detail of the place is on sensory overload. I look for her everywhere, coming around the corner of flying through the front door, but she is gone. That is the tone of this piece. I would sometimes stare at the light play for hours just waiting for it to be a bad dream. However she is never coming home. She is Gone.
I knew I may have a couple type o's I have been waiting for someone to assist me in punctuation.
The phantom's are something only I see, hope to see, she still talks to me and she is everything I miss. There is nothing there but my ghost of a daughter. What an Amazing review. Thank you for reading and reviewing my work.

Sheer Terror

[Violet.Vixen]

This is so beautiful! The imagery you've created is just stunning! I hope to develop the skills you so clearly have one day! Thanks for the inspiration.

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Violet Vixen, I appreciate your stellar review. Thank you for taking the time.

Sheer Terror

[Carol Cashes]

"A chair is just a chair or the end of a row
the ease next to me now leans empty of your grace"

Perfectly executed. Another good read.

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Carol, this piece is attached to me it is about my grace and my making peace with the things I cannot control. Thank you for reading and reviewing. God Bless

Sheer Terror

[Carol Cashes]

I did get that, just some lines stand out to me as excellent examples of how to combine words to create images. The chair reference was immediate and swift to this neophyte.

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Thank you so much

[apennylate]

Holy, man... This... I... You write how I wish I could... The overlay of gray emotion, monotone, almost... But brimming with vivacity... Your metaphors are stunning... I strive to reach from the abstract in the elegant way you do... Friggin' bravo'... Obscurity does not seem to create vacancy of thought here... Masterfully penned... (Seriously)...

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Silente, this piece represents a significant moment of despair and during that significant moment I realized every ordinary thing was still ordinary. The world around me unaware of my despair. I was angry that the sun still shined in my window. When I wrote this I wasn't going to post as with a lot of my writing I lack confidence. I am proud that I did now. the reviews are good, your review is spectacular I have special attachment to this and all my writing. I sometimes lose my perspective so it is good to have others tell you its good. I do think you are very generous. Thank you so much for reading and feeding of my ego Sir

Sheer Terror

[apennylate]

Thank you for sharing, both the astounding poetry, and the personal story... I, also, lack quite a bit of confidence in what I write, and only post about one percent of things, heh... This is absolutely worthy of being viewed, and is spectacularly breathed... Aye, perspective tends to get lost as we battle ourselves... A gentle word from outside forces can often tip the scales... You are most welcome, and maybe a little generous... Hah

[heartspeaks]

This was SHEER TERROR to other writers....Inspiration for.creative writing... And poetically beautifully... All in all a soulful write... well done

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Thank you so much I enjoy the encouraging words.

[Mr.Writer]

Woah! The feelings and emotions in this poem were really clear and the rhyming enhanced the poem and made it really engaging! Very dark and deep poem
Keep it up

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Mr. Writer I am thrilled that you enjoyed this thank you very much for the review.

[Re-Pete]

a deep, difficult void. you are a master of imagery. always a powerful, captivating experience.

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Pete, this was hard to get through thank you for the review.

[Re-Pete]

i could feel the angst seeping through your emotionally charged words and imagery.

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Thank you !

[Re-Pete]

trust my Sheer, i get it. this is no walk in the park stuff.

[wordman]

wow,some great imagery in this dark write

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Wordman I look forward to your words. Thank you

[wordman]

well i am the wordman