Waving/Drowning

Still running from future

hiding from past

scared of whatever

looking for lost

still breathing in fire

skating on ice

walking the edge by the moon

scar - faced, impatient

wanting all now

not sure of the answer

only the night

demanding amusement

stimulate me free

shackles of body

a fitting embrace

still speaking of silence

dreaming of moves 

fighting through nowness

in bars some call home

Life tastes the same

bottle or glass

learning the blues

is the question...

past masters smile

novices cry

which one are you

and which one am I

Reviews

[Eilis]

I like your use of 'nowness.' Somehow that makes the poem for me.

Maybe because I like the way it pings off of that ending where you seem to be asking which one of us is the phony. I don't know if that's a question that all of us ask, but I know it's a question that I ask myself.

What the hell am I doing with any of this. Not sure an answer exists. Maybe someday when it doesn't matter as much the answer comes.

I like the title and how it reaches out to others who have asked these same questions. The duel between the grounded body and the ambiguous drowning. Too far from shore to warrant action. Good stuff.

[gram linski]

Hey Eilis, haven't been on this site in a while, for obvious reasons, lol, the axis between teacher/student, lover/fool changes constantly, from one tragedy/comedy to the next, sometimes we have to wonder should we laugh/, cry, waving/ drowning,

[barleygirl]

At first, I thought this sounded like uncertainty, but as I read on, I saw the way you were grouping ideas in terms of contrasting responses/feelings. Sometimes it's THIS, sometimes it's THAT. This pattern, over & over, gave your poem a sort of a jazzing pacing, along with a celebratory tone. Life is full of contrasts, we are always being hit by a variety of happenings, humans are always contradictory & hypocritical . . . so your overall message turns into a sassy tongue-in-cheek making fun of our human foibles. The last four lines pump up the sassy tone & jazzy pace, until the ending question really crowns your message well (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[gram linski]

Hey Margie, gram here, smokey jazzy wasn't exactly the vibe I was going for but it works, once again you see something I don't, thanks for yer great review, sorry about time delay

[John Alexander McFadyen]

A twisting flowing piece full of uncertainty and lack of certainty and confidence yet defiant. Not knowing who we are is a common state of mind for the many, Me included, who have never felt they knew where the journey even started. Interesting and thought provoking.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

PS is the title a reference to Stevie Smith?

[Shazbatt969]

Thanks again, No. 1 fan you got the essence exactly, and yes it was a wink and a nod to the fine, fine Stevie,