Its kinda like a journal entry i guess you could say lol it is about a real guy that I've liked for a long time I was talking to him today and i realized i couldn't stop smiling at everything he said and i had a fuzzy feeling it was kinda nice oops I've said too much
My Review
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hate to say, but feels kinda bland. but I guess that's just the style. but it's more so about the meaning right? plus it's suppose to be real-life related, kinda hard to make things tasteful that are a part of the everyday norm.
some things you can add: give metaphorical meaning a try, really ups the anty to poetry, in fact that's what most are all about, saying things without saying them flat out. also, for really getting into poetry, try writing on meters, really helps develop a flow. if you wish, i can edit this a bit to make it flow for you (not gunna write on a meter though, so we'll just keep it free-verse):
Heart beats fast
Face turns red
I start to blush
I love him dearly
I love him so much
So much, he doesn't realize
hes so beautiful
so beautiful with those blue eyes
tranced by his blonde hair
engulfed by his eyes
but, so it goes, he doesn't like me back
wonder I do, but know he probably never will
so to say it kills
"its time to move on"
as said by my friends
but they'd never understand
and they never will
these feelings I have
these feelings that I have
whenever i'm with him
just to think of him
he seems to shine
through all the pain
and sorrow in this life
he always makes me smile
even when i'm down
maybe i'm just being stupid
but to move on is a line I'm not willing to walk now
As for the relationship itself, guys are always easy to get if you know how to lure them lol being a guy myself I can vouch tht most of our kind has a lil bit of a lust side to us than a romantic. But really, just give making moves a try, telling 'em how you feel, and if that doesn't work, it's just not meant to be. Don't get caught up in features, that's not what love is about but most people mistaken it as so. if you known this guy for awhile, and you two are good friends, just tell 'em you're wanting to give being in a relationship a try. Things left said and out on the table are better than things kept in secrecy left to poison your mind with blame for never trying the thing.
I say go for him. If you like him, try to be with him. If it doesn't work, then it doesn't work. The first gf I had I thought I had no chance in hell. Then we dated for three weeks and then she cheated on me.... Wait that isnt something helpful... Anyway, follow your heart!
Who cares what your friends think. If you like him then you can like him, you can't change your feelings for him just because they tell you to get over him. This is great poem, and I wish you all the luck in the world.
I can't say much
I only live for my friends
I love Bring Me The Horizon
Anything else?
Just ask me...
I'm not that interesting
I honestly want to die more..