Proud to be British

Prim, proper, proud prudes
That's what we English are.
Hard to define, easy to spot
We judge, we mock, we roll our eyes
And try our very hardest to be
Middle class.

Red buses, red telephone boxes
And red peeling faces after
Less than a day in the sun.
The Americans love the accent
But we hate theirs - oh and by the way
It's SCONES.

Cuppa at five, tea at six
And don't forget the evening news
Yellow raincoats, a symbol of pride
And rush hour on the M25
There's the North and the South and the Welsh
And the Scots.

We have the best sense of humour
And some beautiful countryside.
We enjoy our French wine and American TV
And let's not forget Indian takeout,
But here's to Britain: we are truly
Prim, proper, proud prudes.

Reviews

[emmajoy]

We are?! You should have heard me when woken this ayem by a storm on what was decreed a sunny day in Darzetshire! No prudery, nor properly by this Miss Prim!

Sorry, 'should have said first off that your poem is great fun. finely metered, as accurate as can be re, historic influence - and a wonderfully proud attitude to and about everything that is us. Thank you so much for waving the flag in all its present glory. :)

[Tony Jordan]

I think you've inadvertently snubbed 840,000 people on the Island of Ireland who consider themselves even more British than the British themselves. Ulster Protestants !

I would have liked to see you phoneticise the word SCONES to get the obsessiveness across e.g. S-C-Oh-N-E-S or such like.

Loved this
"Red buses, red telephone boxes
And red peeling faces after
Less than a day in the sun..." - class!

[Carol Cashes]

This Ugly American thoroughly enjoyed this, and believed about half - the prim, proper prudes, I'm not buyin', but that you hate our accents - no doubt. Even I hate some of the dialects that can be heard in this country. I'm not sure if you're demonstrating your "best sense of humor" or you really mean it. The accent is throwin' me off....