Chapter 1: The Child with the Broken Soul

A little ruined by darkness and how anyone of use who have known abuse from those who are suppose to love us can become broken.

   The Child with the Broken Soul

 

         The year is 1993; a little girl is born addicted to crack in Detroit, Michigan. She barely makes it out of the womb alive. She has yet to cry and is quickly handed over to the nurses where they lay the limp child down on a table with a blanket underneath her and a heating lamp above her. They use suction to try to clear her air ways but still nothing. In all the commotion of the nurses screaming instructions, the doctor trying to control the bleeding of the mother, and the father screaming at his wife out of anger for making him miss something he felt was more important no one saw hazelnut eyes of a five year old girl with long, curly brown hair peering through the doorway watching the baby struggling for life. One of the nurses turned the baby over smacking her back mumbling at the lifeless body to breath. The little girl in the door way sees the baby limp and blue; she starts to cry uncontrollable as if she is watching an old lover die before her eyes. The father was growing impatient he wanted to leave, he told them to just give up, it wasn’t worth his time. They pretended not to hear this worthless excuse for a human being and continued smacking the baby. With one final strong blow from the nurse a little cough came from the baby’s mouth, before anybody realized what had happened the delivery room was filled with the baby’s screams. The little hazelnut eyed girl smiled, happy tears running down her face and before anyone knew she was there she was gone.

 

         The nurse who had smacked life into the child picked her up to give her to her mother. When the nurse turned around with this little miracle her eyes met an unhappy scene. The mother was shaking, not from giving birth but from withdraw of some street drug she used on a daily bases. The father was screaming his head off, his face was red with senseless rage, and two male nurses where holding him back from trying to get to the doctor; he was clearly high on something. The nurse frowned disapprovingly and quickly walked out of the room, the baby firmly in her arms. She started walking towards the elevator to take the new born to the nursery. Once inside the elevator the nurse looked down at the child who was now very much alive, kicking and looking around with the bluest eyes she had ever seen. The nurse’s hair had fallen out of its bun and chocolate black hairs fell down on the infants’ nose causing a giggle to escape from her little toothless mouth. The nurse smiled and put a finger against the little girl’s belly making the new born giggle even more, then the baby grabbed her finger and she was surprised by how much strength the little one had; she had never felt anything like it before.

 

         “You are a strong one aren’t you?” Said the nurse to the infant who was now staring at her with the most curios eyes. The nurse looked into those eyes and swore that even though this child was only minutes old she could see such age in them, as if she had lived for many years. “You’re going to need it too,” she sighed, “but I have a feeling you’re a warrior little one and you’re going to make it.”

 

         While looking down at the baby she notices a birth mark on her wrist. The nurse took a closer look and saw five brown dots in the shape of the red cross that adorns the hospital; the fifth dot in the center. The doors dinged open making the nurse pull away her eyes from the innocent thing she was carrying. She stepped out and started walking to the nursery, once there she handed the baby over to another nurse who placed her in an empty crib. The nurse started crying; she knew this child was destined for unfortunate things.

        

***

         Social Services were called about the new born, but nobody came to take the baby. Apparently her information was lost in a pile of paper work and the call was forgotten about; another innocent life slipped through the cracks of a very broken system. Since no one came the hospital had no choice but to give the baby to her very unqualified parents. The baby was wrapped lovingly in a very thick blanket to keep her warm in the cold Detroit weather and was handed over to her now detoxed mother. They all watched in agony as the mother walked out in the snowy ground knowing full well that the mother would be getting high tonight. The father was waiting in the car impatiently; he was twitching, scratching, and his eyes were bulging out of his head. The mother, before stepping into the car, lit a cigarette and placed the infant girl behind the front passenger seat. The mother thought this was a good idea since they didn’t have a car seat and decided that this was better than the child rolling off the backseat.

        

         The new family left the hospital with the baby, but the parents had no intention of going home. Instead they headed down a street that was rather dark for it only being midday, with broken down houses and smelled of urine. They found a parking spot outside a house that had four other cars around it. The house was at one time a bright red but had faded over the years, it had a rundown porch with steps leading to it, the front yard was littered with trash, and all the windows were covered in blankets with giant holes in them. The parents forgot about the newest member of their family because they quickly turned the car off and headed to the house leaving her alone sleeping soundly inside the car. They walked up to the front door carefully because they could hear the wood creaking warningly under their feet. They were both itching for a hit they knocked quietly but quickly. The door creaked loudly open and a dark eye with red streaks in the whites of them appeared in the crack.

 

         “Wha’ you want?” Came a male voice from behind the door, it was raspy as if he hadn’t used it in a while.

 

         “We’re here to see Jimmy.” Said the father, he was looking around nervously and scratching his right arm as if he had been bitten by something. The eye in the door looked from the father to the mother. “She’s with me,” explained the father, “we just need to get healthy.”

        

         Without another word the door swung open to allow them entrance, the new parents walked in quickly smiling as if this was the happiest moment of their lives. Midday quickly turned into night fall and the temperature was dropping fast. The little girl, who was still without a name, tiredly blinked opened her eyes and looked around. She didn’t feel the cold in fact she was rather warm as if a fire was burning deep inside her. However she hadn’t eaten since they had left the hospital; the cold she could fight, hunger she could not. She squirmed in her blanket hoping the sound of movement would get her mother’s attention, when no one came to feed her she started to cry just a little. She cried softly for a while and soon it turned into screams of hunger. The infant screamed for food for nearly an hour before her worthless parents came stumbling out of the house holding each other up. They let go of each other and both felt their way to the door handle; clearly dizzy from being high. Both slumped into the front seats and turned on the car. They sat their waiting for it to warm up not even hearing the screams of their new born. All of a sudden it was like they were pulled from their drug influenced fantasies and they grabbed their ears in pain from the screaming.

 

         “SHUT THAT THING UP!!!” He screamed at his wife, whatever happiness he felt was gone and his rage was beginning to build. She wiped her head around the seat looking for her baby on the back seat. When she didn’t see it she started panicking, where was that damn baby? Oh yeah on the floor. She leaned over the seat and picked up the screaming infant. She turned back facing the front holding the baby at arm’s length as if it was dangerous.

 

         “SHUT! IT! UP!” He screamed at her again hitting the horn on each word. She looked at the little noise maker with widen eyes not knowing how to make it stop. She looked back at her husband; he was having a panic attack. He had both his hand in his head pulling his hair and rocking back and forth mumbling words like “b***h” “kill’em both”. The woman became gripped with fear she knew him to well, he was going to snap at any moment and beat her senseless. She had to figure out what was wrong with this thing and quick; she brought it close and started rocking it. Nothing, the screaming continued. She bounced it roughly on her knee, still nothing. She thought about when her brother was a baby, the diaper. She unwrapped her child from the warm blanket and pulled open the diaper, nothing completely dry. But why would it be dry? It’s been hours surely she had gone to the bathroom already, unless…

 

         “She’s hungry!” Exclaimed the mother to the father.

 

         “So?! What the hell I’m I suppose to about it? Go to Burger King?!”

 

         “No you idiot she needs milk!!”

 

         “I know that you b***h! You should have your own product of milk in those things!” He told her pointing at her chest. She looked down, she had forgotten completely about breast feeding the only thing she had on her mind was drugs nothing more. Forgetting she had just smoked crack she undid her dirty shirt and pulled out one of her breast. She quickly pulled the screaming child to it and it latched on hungrily. Silence filled the car and the husband began to calm down, once he was back under control he put the car in drive and headed home. On the drive home the mother looked down at her newborn. She was feeding with her eyes close and the mother frowned she felt no connection to this child what so ever. Even though she did not love it maybe it would be fun to have around like a pet and every pet needs a name.

 

         “Lillian.” Said the mother out loud.

 

         “What?!” He replied irritably.

 

         “I’m going to call her Lillian, remember Lillian we use to get high together when we first met she died a few years ago from injecting herself with pure heroin. I miss her terrible, she was so much fun.”

 

         “Whatever that thing is nothing more than wasteful money. We should just dump in the damn river!”

 

         “No! I can dress her up and play with her hair. It’s going to be so much fun.”

 

         “Whatever as long as it stays quiet and out of my way you can keep the stupid thing.”

 

         The mother smiled down at her now sleeping Lillian, she was finally going to have a pet just for her.

 

               ***

         The year is 1998 and little Lillian is now five years old. She has had a rather hard life so far. Both of her parents were unemployed and hard at work to make sure they were stoned out of their minds on a constant bases. They left Lillian alone most of the time, neither did they feed her, and both were known for being rather ruff with the little girl. The mother mostly just dragged her by the head of her hair when she wasn’t doing what she wanted, but the father was much worse. He would kick, punch, spit, and humiliate her anyway possible; for some unknown reason he hated his child. He loved watching her suffer it made him happier than when he was doing drugs. Once the little girl had befriended a stray cat, he saw how happy she was and wouldn’t stand for it. So he went outside and stepped on the cat’s head. He walked back inside laughing at the girl screams and tears.

        

         Lillian woke up one morning on a warm July day on the floor where she slept. She blinked a couple of times trying to wake herself up. She didn’t know what time it was but she knew she was very hungry. She laid there for awhile still trying to wake up out of her groggy state when her belly growled rather loudly. She grabbed her tummy and sighed, she wondered if there was even food in the apartment for her to eat. She became instantly bitter at the thought of having to go another day without a proper meal; it wasn’t fare she never asked to suffer through this.

 

         She got up from the filthy floor and looked around; her apartment was a total toilet to put it nicely. It was a one room apartment she slept on the floor in the bedroom, even when her parents were home she slept in there they would crash on the couch in the living room. The walls were blackened from years of dirt and smoke, they had cracks in them, some even had holes allowing the outdoor air to rush in. During the summer this was rather nice since they had no air conditioning but during the winter it made the place ice cold. The only things on the walls were a crucifix and a picture of Jesus; which was in every room in the apartment. She looked at the picture in disgust; she hates Christianity. Her parents are Christian fanatics, using it as an excuse to abuse her, praying to Jesus to find a way for them to get high, and going on angry rants about how amazing he is while wasted. The only time they went to church was to ask the pastor for money; which the pastor always gave and he never once cared to ask about Lillian. For some reason he also didn’t like the girl. He told her parents that he sensed the devil insider her and that Jesus had told him that she was a threat. This did not help the beatings that she received.

 

         The windows of the apartment were sealed shut by the former owner because of the massive break-ins. The apartment was not located in the best part of town; it was deep inside the under belly of Detroit. Lillian had put a stained sheet over them in order to block the sun. Her parents never had the lights on so Lillian had grown up with continues darkness. She had grown fond of the darkness and actually disliked the light.

 

         Lillian lifted up her father’s shirt she was wearing, so she wouldn’t trip, and started walking towards the kitchen in search of food. As she was walking she could hear crunchy noises coming from under her bare feet. The carpet of the apartment hadn’t been vacuumed in years; the amount of dirt and rubbish that had gotten into its fibers is unthinkable. She continued anyway ignoring the gross sounds and entered the living room. The blue eyed girl stopped and scanned her eyes across the room searching for her parents. They were nowhere to be seen, they must have passed out where ever they had ‘scored’ last night. The living room was actually worse than the bedroom, mostly because Lillian actually attempted to keep it clean. The couch was an ugly muddy brown with green and red strips, it had holes in the cushions which had stuffing popping out of them, it had a number of colorful stains on it. The floor was just as filthy as the rest of the house. There was a sliding glass door at the end of the living room which led outside; it was covered in dirty finger prints and had dried urine on it as well. The sun light was pouring in giving light into the apartment exposing empty beer bottles, dirty needles, melted candles, and used cigarettes scattered across the room. The little girl just shrugged and skipped into the kitchen. The kitchen was very small no bigger than medium size walk in closet. Just like the rest of the apartment it was a mess. Dirty dishes were piled up and over flowing in the sink. There was rotting food on the floor and on the counters, which were stained brown and black from coffee and other products. Lillian walked into the kitchen, her feet sticking to the kitchen floor, and headed to one of the pantries. She opened it and found one cereal box left. She picked up the box and shook it. The sound of sugary cereal bouncing around in the box hit her ears. Lillian looked at the expiration date; two days old. She thought about putting it back then her belly rumbled louder than before. She moaned, it was either go hungry another day or swallow stale old cereal. ‘grrrrraaawwww.’ Cereal.

 

         Lillian put the box on the counter and opened the door to the refrigerator.

 

         “Yeckkkk!” She yelled slamming the door shut as soon as she opened it. Forget looking for milk she could barely handle the smell that had came rushing out of the refrigerator. Whatever was causing that smell had gone really bad; so she decided it was best to just eat the cereal dry. She grabbed the box and started munching on the food as she headed back to the bedroom.

 

         Once back in the bedroom Lillian sat down on the floor and ate her breakfast in silence. She looked around the room mindlessly thinking about what she wanted to do today. She was not going to be staying here waiting around for her wasted, or worse sober, parents. It was a nice day out so there would be lots to do but she wanted to go somewhere where people wouldn’t bother her; something with nature. The zoo! It was perfect people were too interested in the animals and their surroundings to notice a little girl all alone. Money wasn’t a problem either; she knew how to get in. All she had to do was wait until a family with kids walked up to pay and she would just walk right in with them, no one ever notice her; which was a gift some days and a curse on others. However in order to be convincing she had to look somewhat decent; the kids that went into the Detroit Zoo were wealthy, well wealthier then her. So Lillian decided to see what she looked liked. She picked up a hand mirror that was lying next to where she slept. The mirror was nothing really; it was made of plain wood, the paint long gone, and the mirror was cracked. But Lillian did not complain, she stole it from a garbage can about a month ago and was happy with whatever she got.

 

         She aimed the mirror towards her face to see what she looked like. Lillian moaned when she saw her face, she was absolutely filthy. She had smudges of dirt on her cheeks and chin; her long blonde hair looked like she had not brushed or washed in weeks. She stared at herself, bright blue eyes staring deeply back at her, if anyone was in the room they would have saw all the sadness in the world in those eyes. The little girl looked away from the mirror, grabbed some dirty clothes that were on the floor, and headed back to the kitchen.

 

         Lillian started to empty out the dirty dishes in the sink so she could wash her clothes and herself. She put her clothes in the now empty sink and pulled up the faucet handle. Nothing. She put the handle back down then up again; still nothing. She grew angry, her parent did not pay the water bill and it was shut off. In her anger she started lifting the handle up in down repeatedly with all her strength.

 

         “Ahhhhhh!” She screamed at the faucet in her frustration.

 

         Damn, no water now what was she going to do? She had to get clean otherwise she might as well just stay inside. An idea popped in her head, there was a house not far from the apartment complex and the owners always left the basement door unlocked. Depending on what time of the day it was no one should be home. She peered into the living room to see where the sun was at. According to the sun it was probable around 10:30am; perfect no one would be home. Living without a clock, any technology really, has taught her to use other resources.

 

         Lillian quickly grabbed her clothes and headed for the door. She was still wearing her father’s t-shirt, but it was long enough to cover her legs. It didn’t really matter no one would notice her, especially in this neighborhood. The only time people looked at her were physicians and nurses while walking down the street. Lillian’s figure is rather unique. To most people she is just a fat little girl, which is why she no longer ask people for food because they do not believe she is going hungry, however in fact she the opposite. Her body is extremely toned for someone so young; she is bigger and wider than most little girl but can lift almost twice her own body weight. She was extremely strong and her body showed that. 

 

         Once outside she headed up the hill towards the houses. She shielded her eyes from the harsh sunlight, but loved the feeling of grass on her feet. For it only being 10:30 in the morning it was rather hot outside. About ten minutes had gone by before Lillian was at the fence of the house with beads of sweat on her little forehead; she easily climbed over it. She sneaked up to the house quietly and peered through the window just to double check no one was home. The house was perfectly empty; the house wasn’t much it was broken down and dirty but Lillian envied the people in it. There walls did not have holes, or pictures of Jesus, and had both heat and air conditioning. Lillian crinkled her nose at the thought and headed to basement door. She climbed down the few steps that leaded to the door. Before opening she looked around to make sure she was alone; once satisfied she turned the knob and entered.

 

         Cold air hit her face; she closed her eyes welcoming the feeling swim over her body. She took one step on the concrete basement floor. She yelped and stepped back quickly, it was freezing. She stepped again but this time she waited for her little dirty feet to get use to the cold. Once they were she started up the stairs to the main part of the house. She knew her way around the place she had sneaked in several times before looking for anything she could, but Lillian only took what she needed to survive nothing more. Stealing made her feel like a snake in the grass, a pathetic creature just like her parents. She went into the laundry room once in the main part of the house. The little girl quickly undressed and threw all of her clothes in the washer; she then poured some detergent in and pulled the knob to start it. Well since that was taken care of she now had time to take a hot shower. Even though she didn’t like showers, now wasn’t the time to have personal feelings and wants, she needed to put them aside in order to complete her task.

 

         After a quick shower she went back to the washing machine and took out her clothes and put them in a very old drier. She returned to the bathroom and brushed the rather large knots in her hair. After the painful chore of brushing her hair she went back to the drier to see if it was done. Her clothes still had awhile; so while she was waiting she decided to make herself a sandwich and turn on the television set. After making herself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and pouring herself a cold glass of milk she sat down comfortably on the owner’s of the house couch then clicked on the television with a large black remote. Lillian began to flip through the channels mindlessly passing many things most children would stop and watch. However despite the fact little Lillian was only five years old she had always felt much older than she actually was. After channel surfing something caught her eye so she stopped. It was CNN news channel and they were talking about how the Unabomber was dealing with life in prison. They brought up what he did and why he did it which made them quickly change the subject to the World Trade Center bombings. Lillian snorted and rolled her eyes. She hated people; humanity was cruel, dark, mean, and downright stupid. Everybody was out for themselves and they all thought that they are right and everyone else is wrong. The entire human race had lost whatever goodness it once possessed; if it had any in the first place.

 

         “This brings us to our next news of the day.” Said the anchorman, causing Lillian to come out of her darkened thoughts. “Today in Rome 120 countries voted to create a permanent International Criminal Court to prosecute individuals for genocide, crimes against humanity, war crimes, and the crime of aggression.” Lillian had been taking of drink of the milk when she heard this. She laughed and sprayed milk on herself and the floor. She found this absolutely hysterical. ‘Yeah right!’ she thought. Nobody was really going to stop these crimes unless it benefited them in some way, and Lillian was pretty sure that most if not all of these countries had committed at least one of these crimes. People are selfish, that was that. Hearing the buzzer from the drier, signaling her clothes were nice and dry, she got up and put her dishes in the sink. After getting her clothes on she returned to the sink. She cleaned and returned the dishes to their rightful places; no need to get anyone suspicious that someone was creeping around their household. Before leaving she turned off the TV it was time to go to the Zoo.

 

         It only took Lillian twenty minutes to get to the Detroit Zoo and another fifteen to wait for the perfect family to sneak in with. They were a rather large family; a mother, a father, an infant in the stroller, and four other kids ranging from probable five through twelve years old. The guy in the ticket booth never saw the baby in the stroller so when he saw Lillian walk right in behind the rest of the lot he merely counted five children. Once in she grew very excited. No one would bother her and she loved animals more than anything. Animals didn’t judge her, they weren’t mean to her, and they certainly never purposely harmed her. Not to mention whenever she stared at the animals she felt such a connection to them and most would walk right up to her as if they were close friends.

 

         She looked around deciding where she wanted to go to first. Perhaps the penguins? Adorable little things, they always made her laugh plus it would be nice in cool in there. ‘To many people.’ She thought to herself, she wasn’t stupid it was a hot day that’s where most people would end up flocking to. In the end she merely shrugged and decided she would just walk around until she got bored then head back to the apartment.

 

         She visited the monkeys first they might not be the penguins but they still made her laugh. After that she just went down the line lemurs, pandas, reptiles, and so on. When she got to the tigers she stopped to spend some time with them. She loved the tigers, they were her favorite. The tigers were kept in a pit so you had to look down in order to see them. The tigers were lying in the shade sleeping and many people were trying to get their attention but with no luck. Lillian smirked then whistled, the tigers open their eyes immediately. They got up lazily and stretched before walking over to the wall. Lillian whistled again so they knew where she was. The tigers looked up at her and began to lick and rub up against the wall showing how happy they were to see her again. She grinned showing her little teeth at them and mouthed ‘hi’. One of the cubs came up to the wall and tried climbing it when he failed he just gave a little cute roar in disappointment. Everyone giggled and awed at the cub; no one knew why the tigers were suddenly active but they were enjoying it.

 

         After about a half hour of talking and watching the tigers she waved good bye and sat under a nearby tree. She sat down and heard moans of disappointment coming from the crowd around the tiger pit. Lillian figured this was because the tigers went to lay back down in the shade. A very rude thirteen year old boy did not like this.

 

         “Hey you stupid cats come back, I wanna see you!” He bellowed.

 

         Lillian rolled her eyes. The animals were going to do whatever they wanted and they sure were not going to listen to him.

 

         “Hey!” He screamed. “HEY!” he yelled louder showing his anger. When the tigers did do what he wanted he picked up a rock and threw it in the pit. Lillian’s eyes widen, at first she was shocked but that quickly turned into anger. How dare he throw a rock at those innocent animals! The boy picked up another rock and threw it hard this time clearly aiming for something. A growl came from the pit. Lillian felt her face get hot, it was probable turning a bright red; she was furious. An evil snarl came across the boys face; if he couldn’t get them to come over to him he was going to at least have some sort of fun. He bent down and picked up a bigger rock this time. He leaned down against the wall of the pit so he could get a better aim and then he threw with all his strength. A little cry came from the pit. He had hit the baby cub and it was in pain. Lillian flew up on to her feet. ‘Oh no he didn’t!’ she thought while her hands balled into fist. Her blood was boiling she could feel a fire burning hot inside her. She was going to push that little brat right over the wall and let the tigers take their revenge on him. He deserved it hurting something smaller than him! Wait if she goes over and pushes him she WILL get noticed then. She looked around trying to figure out how she could get him into that pit without anyone knowing it was her. The thirteen year old was laughing hard leaning down into the pit pointing at the cub who was curled into a ball in pain. Lillian looked down and saw a good size rock; if she hit him just right on the head he’d topple right over. She picked it up and looked at the boy. She smiled she was going to get justice for these animals. Lillian aimed then wounded up her arm and…

  “Hey!” came a girl’s voice with a British accent from behind her. Someone grabbed Lillian’s arm that had the rock in it. “What do you think you are doing?”

         Lillian wiped around she hated being touched. She opened her mouth to tell this girl off when she did her blue eyes met hazelnut brown ones. For some reason the moment she looked into those eyes no words could come out so she just closed her mouth. The girl was older then she was, she was taller than Lillian, and she had long curly brown hair. She was clearly wealthy because she had on the nicest white button up shirt which was tucked into a very nice knee length blue plaid skirt Lillian had ever seen. The little girl also had on gold bracelets and a necklace which had a ‘S’ on it.

 

         “Let go of me!” Lillian shouted at the strange girl. The girl let go of Lillian’s arm at once, but looked down sternly at her. Lillian still had a hold of the rock and was staring back just as stern. After about a minute of silence Lillian spoke. 

 

         “What?” She spat rudely, she was not use to people paying her any bit of attention let alone just staring at her.

 

         “I know what you were about to do.” She said matter-of-factually with her thick British accent.

 

         “Oh reallyyyyy? And exactly how do you know what I was about to do?” replied Lillian rolling her eyes, she was one smart mouth brat.

 

         The British girl gave a little smirk at this comment. “You’d be surprised how much I know.” She said sweetly to the five year old.

 

         Lillian’s face contorted in a confused look. “What?” She asked the girl in a hotly tone.

 

         The British girl chuckled at her tone of voice and cupped Lillian’s face with her left hand.“You have always been this way.” She said beaming at the little girl.

 

         Usually Lillian would have pulled away. She couldn’t stand being touched; every physical touch she had ever received was a negative one. Her father only put his hands on her when he wanted to hurt her and as for her mother; she only touched Lillian kindly when she was petting her like a dog. However this felt different; her face began to feel warm where the British girl’s hand was at and her belly filled with butterflies. This felt good; natural even. Lillian closed her eyes and leaned into the touch. When she heard the ten year old giggle at this she snapped back to her old self and pulled away; her face reddening with embarrassment. The girl looked hurt by this action but she ignored it.

 

         “Look you shouldn’t be throwing rocks and trying to hurt people. That’s not right.” She said to Lillian in a sweet but stern tone.

 

         “You’re not my mother and even if you were I still wouldn’t listen to you. How much older than me are you anyway? Like two years?”

 

         The British girl snickered and shook her head at this question. It seems she found Lillian to be very entertaining.

 

         “Actually I’m five years old than you little one.”

 

         “I’m going to ignore that last part. Whatever my point is you’re not an adult, so why should I listen to you?”

 

         Lillian stared at the smiling ten year old daring her to reply. But she didn’t she merely stood there staring back at Lillian, her lips forming a smile. Clearly she found Lillian very funny. When she didn’t reply to her question Lillian found herself oddly intrigued by her. First, no one ever notices her and yet this girl did. Second, despite being only ten she seemed so much older; she could see it in the girl’s eyes.

 

         “What’s your name?” Asked Lillian a little less hotly this time.

 

         She bent down and came face to face with Lillian.

 

         “I go by many names, little one.” She whispered to her. They stared into each other’s eyes for a little while. The ten year old girl slowly lifted up her hand to touch Lillian’s face, but her touch was interrupted by someone calling out.

 

         “Emily?” Said the voice; it was a woman also with a thick British accent and it sounded slightly flustered as if scared. The ten year old put down her hand and turned her head towards the sound of the voice.

 

         “So your name’s Emily?” Lillian asked after seeing the girl’s reaction to the name.

 

         “One of them,” she answered turning back to face Lillian, “listen I have to go but before I do drop the rock.”

 

         Lillian obeyed blindly and dropped the rock. It wasn’t until she heard the ‘thunk’ sound of it hitting the ground did she realize what she just did. ‘What the?’ She thought becoming very confused. She had never listened to anyone before let alone so quickly and easily. Her confusion must have been showing on her face because Emily smiled and giggled silently.

 

         “Listen to me,” she said grabbing a hold of Lillian’s face with both hands. Lillian’s eyes, which had fixated on the rock she had dropped, snapped up to meet Emily’s. Emily smile had faded and her eyes started to fill with tears. “You need to be brave, okay?” Before Lillian could say anything to this Emily pulled Lillian’s head towards hers and kissed her forehead. Lillian’s eyes fluttered shut and she leaned into the kiss. She felt warm all over and those butterflies in her tummy started flapping around again. Emily pulled away and smiled at her. Lillian’s face grew red at the smile and looked down. Emily smiled weakly at her; tears quietly falling down her face.

 

         “Now go.” She commanded nicely.

 

         Lillian looked at her feeling awkward after the kiss. Lillian muttered “weirdo” as she turned and slowly started walking away.

 

         “And stay out of trouble.” Emily called to her. Lillian, only a couple of steps away, turned and gave her a weird look. As Lillian continued to walk away Emily turned away from her; tears still streaming down her face. She heard her name being called again by her mother. Emily wiped the tears away, trying to compose herself, and then walked towards the sound of her mother’s voice.

 

         As Lillian got further away from Emily the awkward feeling began to slip away. The thirteen year old boy that had been tormenting the tigers had grown bored and started running to another exhibit. He was heading Lillian’s way and was running with some speed. Right before he was about to pass her Lillian stuck out her foot causing the boy to trip. He land face first on the rock built path, causing a tooth to be knocked out. Lillian skipped away happily as the boy lay unconscious on the ground, a pool of blood forming around his head and mouth. Lillian skipped out of the Detroit Zoo unnoticed; forgetting about the British ten year old girl named Emily.

 

***

         It’s February 12, 1999 and it’s almost been a year since Lillian saw that ten year old British girl in the Detroit Zoo; but to Lillian it had been a lifetime ago. Her world had found a way to get darker. Her parents had run out of money; they had lost their disability, welfare, and their unemployment had run out as well. First thing to go was the water again, this was always the first thing to go since they never had electricity is was pretty much the only thing they had left. Second thing to go was their car; not that big of a deal they could walk to get the poison they needed. The third thing was the apartment; they had until the end of the month to clear out. The last and finale thing to go was of course the drugs and without their bad habit to keep them occupied their concentrated turned on the only thing they had left; Lillian.

 

         At first it wasn’t too bad, it appeared that they forgotten they even had a child. They turned on each other screaming, hitting, throwing things day in and day out. Lillian would just hide in her room until they either left or fell asleep then she would sneak out to look for food and water. Once she had gone two days without food and water, her parents had gone so long without drugs withdraw was making them stay awake for days just screaming at each other. Lillian couldn’t take it anymore, she needed food and water. She tried her best to sneak out without being scene. Usually she was very good at this but because of lack of nourishment she was very dizzy. Right before she was about to reach the door she lost her balance and fell hard on the floor. Her parents stopped arguing with each other and turned to see what had made the noise. They found their young child Lillian on the flooring looking up at them petrified from fear. Once they realized she was still around is when they started on her. They still went at each other like rabid cats and dogs, but once they were done on each other it was Lillian’s turn.

 

         Her mother would mostly yell at her and call her names. However, when she got really angry, usually after her husband beat her mercilessly, she would drag the girl by the head of her hair and smack her around. Lillian’s father was, as usual, much harsher. After beating his wife he would turn on the girl; apparently beating a woman wasn’t satisfying enough he had to do it to a little girl just to feel a bit better. What’s worse is that it was working; he had found a new drug. Hitting his wife was fun but nothing compared to the scream of his little girl. He literally beat her so bad once that, because of the bruises and swelling, she could not move a muscle the very next day. Any other child would have died but she didn’t; even though she begged for it.

 

         The day of February 12 had gotten as worse as it could get. Lillian’s father had scrounged enough money to get one hit. However it wasn’t enough to buy his usual dose of crack, instead he bought a new drug in the area known as crystal meth. The high was intense; her father had felt nothing like this before. He was unaware of who he was or where he was. His eyes grew red and big; something had changed. He was always an evil man but this drug broke something inside of him. He began to scream at his wife, barely forming whole words.

 

         “W***E! W***E!.....JESUS…KILL..W***E! YES JESUS!....KILL W***E!” He screamed at her, pacing back in forth in the living room. His wife was frozen on the couch; she had never seen him like this before. He had gotten almost as bad this before, but something was different she could feel it. As she stared wide eyed at her crazed husband, she knew this was her last and final day.

 

         Back in her room Lillian sat up against the wall, her knees against her chest and her hands covering her ears. She couldn’t take the yelling much longer. Little Lillian was frighten, she knew it was only a matter of time before it would be her turn and whatever undeserved punishment that her mother received would nothing compared to what she would get. Her mind filled with images of what her father was going to do to her when all of sudden something happened.

 

         “AHH!” Lillian cried out in pain, grabbing her chest. She could feel her fear but also her mothers. She knew it was her mother’s, she didn’t know how she knew but she did. Her mother was so frighten it started intensifying her own fears. Then another jab of pain to heart came, it was so strong that it made her fling herself to the floor. Her hand kept her up but it was shacking; her stomach was rolling as if at any moment she would be sick all over the floor. She could now feel everyone’s fear in Detroit. Oh how frighten they are, scared about almost everything imaginable. Then Lillian began to feel their pain, their sorrow, their hate. She felt all of it, and those feelings connected to hers’. Lillian began to cry uncontrollable they were hurting and now she was also hurting of the same emotions. Her whole body shook, she tried to scream out but nothing. Her mouth just opened over and over again attempting to make noise. She opened her mouth once more to scream the pain of her and thousands of people.

 

         “Ahhhhhhhh!” She closed her mouth and forced her head up looking at the closed door. That was not her that was her mother’s screaming. Before she had time to comprehend why her mother was screaming she felt physical pain all over her body. It was as if someone invisible was beating her. Her father had started beating her mother and she could feel ever hit. His fist felt like stones against her little body. Lillian attempted to protect herself but she could not block what she could not see. With ever hit her body was being thrashed around; banging against the wall, smashed into the ground, and even at times lifted into the air. Then it stopped. Lillian’s body was black and blue, blood was seeping from her nose, and her left eye was swollen shut. Lillian forced herself back up against the wall, every part of her shaking. She could still feel the pain of an unknown number of people and those numbers were growing with every passing second. Her mother’s was the strongest though. The woman was in so much physical pain and her fear was unbearable. Lillian started crying again, the weight of her own emotions plus those of other began to crush the life out the little girl; she was dying.  A jolt went through her, her mother’s fear and panic had suddenly grown. Lillian’s heart started beating against her chest so fast and hard that she thought for sure it was going to burst.

 

         “N- AHHH!” Her mother screamed suddenly from the living room. At that exact moment Lillian grabbed her face in pain. It felt like someone had stuck something sharp directly under her right eye. She collapsed on the floor once more as the pain grew worse. She could even hear the sound of the sharp object cutting against her skin. Lillian was kicking at the air and started clawing at her face hoping to stop whatever it was from causing her any more pain. She could feel hot gooey blood dripping down the side of her face from the wound. Her mother’s pain was making it worse. Even after the cut had stopped forming she could still feel that her mother was as not as lucky. Lillian felt three hot sharp jabs to her torso and she felt her mother breath for the last time.

 

         Lillian stayed were she was; her body was throbbing from pain. She was dying not from the wounds but from what she was feeling on the inside. The apartment had grown silent and Lillian had hoped it was now all over. It wasn’t until she heard the creaks coming from the hallway did she realize that her father had not forgotten about his only child, like always, it was her turn. Lillian looked up at the door, the room was spinning and everything was blurry but she knew at any moment he would walk through that door and take her life. All of a sudden it was as if a fire had erupted inside of her. She hated him. The fire began to burn stronger and she could feel her skin growing warm. The hate inside her grew along with hate of millions of people. She could feel their anger and all her physical pain went away. Before long hate was all she could feel. Lillian sat herself up against the wall one last time and put her knees to her chest resting her forehead on them. She heard the door open with a squeak. She didn’t look up; she didn’t want to look at him. Her father was covered in blood staring wildly at his daughter. He had a long kitchen knife, which was also covered in blood, in his left hand and in his right he was clutching to something that appeared to be flesh like and deep red.

 

         “Little w***e.” He whispered darkly as his lips curled into an evil, wicked smile.

 

         When Lillian heard those words the fire inside grew as big as it could in her. Her body was smoldering; steam coming off her skin. All her and the worlds rage was boiling inside and she looked up at her father. Her father’s smile disappeared as soon as he saw his child’s eyes. Lillian’s eyes had fire coming out of them licking the side of her face. There was no trace of her blue eyes there was only fire. Her father grew frighten even in his condition he knew this was not right. Lillian looked at him begging him to do something. He took the hint and came at her; the knife up above his head in striking position. As he came towards her she took in all the pain, sadness, fear, and hate of the world, along with her own, and screamed it at him. As she screamed a bright light burst out from her chest blinding her. Before her vision could return, Lillian fell unconscious.

 

         After several hours of unconsciousness Lillian opened her eyes. She laid there for a while wondering what had happened. She tried to piece things together but before she did she realized something had changed. She could no longer feel the emotions of the world, or hers’ for that matter. She sat up quickly and winced. She might not be able to feel emotions but she still could feel physical pain. After slowly readjusting herself to an upright position she looked around the room; it was burnt. The walls had blackened, the picture of Jesus and the crucifix laid in a pile of ash below where they once hanged, and the carpet was singed from a fire. Lillian’s eyes met a black mass curled on the floor not far from where she was sitting. She got up to take a closer look. When she got closer she realized it was the burnt body of her father. He was lying in a fetal position; his hands formed into fist with the melted blade in the left one, and his skin was dry, black and cracked which was oozing blood. As Lillian looked down at her deceased father she felt nothing. Absolutely nothing, not even emptiness or a coldness it was truly nothing. She cocked her had at her father wondering how this could have happened then walked out towards the living room. Lillian stepped into the living room and found her mother’s dead body covered in blood. She saw that her mother’s face had been partly cut off. Lillian saw a long deep arrow pointed cut directly underneath her right eye. Lillian touched the right side of her face and felt the same mark. Somehow while emotionally connected to her mother she received some of her mother’s wounds. Just like her father she felt nothing while staring at her mother’s body. The only thing that Lillian was thinking about was what to do next. No one in this apartment complex was going to call the police, it would get them a one way ticket to jail and no one was going to take that chance. So Lillian had to do something she couldn’t just stay here with dead bodies until the end of the month when the landlord would come to kick them out, no she had to find a phone and call 911. Lillian remembered the house she used to sneak into. She had no idea what time it was, because the sun was hidden under winter grey clouds, but perhaps someone would be home.

 

         She walked to the house but no one answered the door. Lillian went to house to house until an old man finally answered at one. He looked down at the bloody, beaten girl and grew instantly annoyed.

 

         “What do you want?”

 

         “May I use your phone please.” Replied Lillian in a monotone, emotionless voice. The old man rolled his eyes and moved out of the way to let her in. She walked through the door and into his living room. He walked into his kitchen mumbling about how people with problems always end up on his front door. He came back in with a cheap cordless phone and handed it to Lillian; she quietly dialed 911. Lillian explained to the operator what had happened and where her apartment was located. She hung up and handed the phone back to the old man thanking him before showing herself out. Once back inside her apartment she sat on the sofa and waited for the police. The Child with the Broken Soul was born.

Author's Note

may have grammar problems