Home Is No Longer There

Innocence is lost and with it, innocence's shelter.

There's something about this place; so nostalgic. 

Is it the dustballs that float in the air like light snow on the eve of winter and the dense feeling it creates?  It compliments my hollow body nicely, filling the empty space as I breathe in. 

Or is it the old things, antiques and little wonders we collected as children?  They remind me of all the things I lost, all the memories I don't have, and the happiness I can't seem to grasp for long.

Maybe it's the absense of everything neccessary, like food and a bed... It's unconstricting; a relief; liberation from the norm of home.

The shadows play with my face, morphing it into something unrecognizable and creates a new me.  If only it was that easy. 

Maybe it's the darkness that lures me to this place.  Without light I'm not exposed, I'm hidden behind shadows, changed; not the same.  I'm free to be who I want to without anyone seeing the metamorphasis. 

Or is it the light that has faded from here?  Your face is now absent, the radiance gone; it leaves a strange echo that plays an eerie tune in my ears.  I can't seem to get enough of the music it orchestrates just for me.

These walls scream of abandonment, just like my eyes, and of what could have become of it.  This place could have been a shelter, a warm welcoming home, but instead we've left its confinement; we turned it into an artifact of our past innocence.

That's why I return, I guess.  I want to go back to that time when innocence had yet to be lost, when happiness was easily tangible and accessible.  Times have changed though, deteriating our playground into something unrecognizable, just like ourselves as our innocence faded slowly away.

If I were to lean on these walls that once held us up and above all those who dared to taint us, will they hold steady?  Or shall the only support I have left, crumble to the ground into rubble, just like everything else?

If I were to fall asleep here, trusting it to be my shelter once again and hide me from the world, would it hold its promise?  Would this place keep me safe from harm or would it betray me?  Just like so many others before...

Can I lean on you?  You've drawn me here, back to the beginning of our lives; the lives we so easily threw away just as we did this place, our home. 

Everything about this place is nostalgic but is it worth missing now that it's gone?

 

Reviews

[Greg Skura]

This is an awesome poem!! This is a very creative and profound anology! Full of imagery and a sincere sense of longing for a time when things were not so complicated! Innocence lost and recognised is a painful lesson although neccessary to be able to return to the child within! Thank you for sharing!