Chapter 4

What is it about text messages and the internet that make it seem ok to send nastiness through the cyber waves? It's so easy to type out words and phrases you would never say in person and hit send before a second thought. I'm live on Periscope and people ask to see my b***s and say all other sorts of strange and mildly perverted stuff. I ask nicely for it to stop, I don't want to have to block people. But really how many of those people sending messages would say what they typed into the chat to me in person? Would they look me dead in the eye and ask to see my b***s and tell me what they want to do to my body parts? I seriously doubt it. Then as I was about to send a nasty text of my own to someone who broke an agreement, I felt how easy it is to get caught up in the etherspace of texting, messaging and the online world. Then I remembered my own teaching, my own path and took time to reflect before responding. Pause before sending anything when you're in a flooded emotional state. Press pause just long enough to consider that there are real people that you're communicating with, whether it's here on IG, on Periscope, on a text thread or in person. 

If you get drawn into drama, pause long enough to take ten deep breaths before entering the battle. See if a few seeds of understanding make their way to your heart. Remember to W.A.I.T and ask yourself "why am I talking?" Pause long enough to remember why you're engaging. Pause long enough to remember that you are not your emotions, that you are more powerful than any feeling that might be arising. Pause long enough to tune in to a place of imperturbable peace within yourself. Pause long enough to remember that all that matters if the love you share. Only love is real. Everything else fades away, but the love you share lasts forever. Imagine if we spent a whole day sharing only love. No drama, no negatively, no meanness, no belittling comments. Just peace, love, healing, tolerance and compassion. The world would be a better place.

Insecurity. It sucks. It comes at you like an undertow. I woke up this morning feeling tired, stiff, weak, sore, fat and old. I barely want to practice. But I am getting on my mat. We are not perfect, but we are perfectly imperfect. In fact our fallibility is maybe the only thing we can count on as humans. We all have bad days where our doubt gets the better hand. The antidote to insecurity is love. Love yourself and all your faults and weakness and tiredness. Love your whole world, it's all you've got. You're good enough as you are, you're all you've got. You don't get to trade yourself in for another model, you have to make peace with yourself as you are. Love yourself, love your world. Be real, build no pedestals, worship no false idols, share what scars you. The higher the pedestal, the farther down to fall.

Be brave and share some aspect of yourself that is hard for you to accept. It only has power over you when it's the dirty secret in the room that no one wants to talk about.

Take nothing for granted. Tell the people that you love that you love them. Don't assume it's known. Share your heart. Risk it all. Don't wait for someone to figure it out because most likely scenario is that they won't. What we think is clear is often murky. State your feelings honestly and clearly and don't play any games. I had an ex-boyfriend who never liked to say "I love you" because he thought it meant less the more you say it. While I understood his point, I'm exactly the opposite. You never know when the moment may be your last together, so share your love. Scream it out from the rooftops, let it be known. I feel something is strange if I don't tell my husband that I love him at least a few times a day and if the three words of "I love you" aren't the last thing I say to him at night. 

Don't let the sun go down today without saying those three magic words to at least one person, I love you. If some negativity is blocking your expression of love, the best way to get over your anger is to talk about it, open an earnest dialogue and clear the air. Holding it all inside your heart may just eat you up from the inside out. Appreciate every moment of kindness, generosity and love. Speak with a compassionate, truthful heart. Be brave enough to share you innermost thoughts. Be brave enough to be exactly who you are. Communicate, share, express. Find your voice. 

I hit the snooze three times this morning. When I did manage to drag myself out of bed I was more interested in online shopping that doing my practice. I procrastinated for nearly three hours but I finally made it on my mat. I don't know if it's the rainy day, the jet lag, general malaise or what but I barely made it to my mat. I'm glad I did though. Practice doesn't have to be perfect. And it doesn't have to be the full-on ninety minute sweat fest that many people think. It doesn't have to be super deep or super strong or super at all. It just needs to happen every day. Like brushing your teeth, the practice is a daily ritual of self-care without which you start to get a little unclean

Establish a practice ritual that incorporates practice into your daily routine. If you practice at around the same time, in the same place every day there is a momentum that draws you forward. You won't have to question whether or not you're going to practice. You just do it because it's so much a part of who you are. It doesn't matter if you're tired, sick, sleepy, grumpy, happy, sad, lazy, whatever. You just get on your mat and practice. There is a humility that comes from just getting on your mat every day. The positive inertia driving you forward in your daily practice will only assure you of making steady progress in you practice. But most importantly it will assure that you are living a more peaceful life. 

So are you getting on your mat today? 

There is a quiet voice of wisdom sitting in the infinite space of the heart center. This deep stillness is waiting for you to learn how to listen. It is infinitely patient, loving, forgiving, never judging. Once you truly hear this eternal voice you will know that it has been guiding every moment in your life. The practice of yoga teaches you how to quiet the stream of inner commentary so that you can tune into this ancient voice. You could all it intuition, you could call it the higher mind, you could call it Grace. In Sanskrit it is sometimes called the Buddhi. How many times have you ignored this voice only to find out your hunch was right? If something doesn't feel right it probably isn't. It's the ego that says go ahead, eh, it will be fine. Decipher between your intuition and your ego with the power of yoga. Let the spirit guide your every move. Surrender your will into Divine will and find freedom in your heart. Stillness speaks. Yoga teaches you how to listen.