All Alone
A Poem by
Shadowkai
Working it into a song... I hope i can make it one someday
Here in the dark
I can't take
Remembering days
That have passed away
Out on my own
Fading away
That'd be the most
That my heart could take
Why did you leave
Me behind
Thinking of you
As I watch the sky
I can't move on
Not now
Memories of us
Tearing me down
© 2015 Shadowkai
Author's Note
Work in progress... Let me know what you think :)
Reviews
Your rhyming is nicely done, it's not forced nor overdone. It captures the impact our own memories can have on us. I must say though, it could have been a bit longer and more descriptive. Overall, very nice. Good job.
Posted 7 Years Ago
We might have bad memories in our lives but we can't erase those memories. Those memories are important to us as we decided to take another path that alter our fate. It's an interesting poem. Thanks for sharing this poem full of values. Keep it up in the future !
Posted 8 Years Ago
We might have bad memories in our lives but we can't erase those memories. Those memories are important to us as we decided to take another path that alter our fate. It's an interesting poem. Thanks for sharing this poem full of values. Keep it up in the future !
really most precious gift called 'memory',is never fetched ..nice work
Posted 8 Years Ago
really most precious gift called 'memory',is never fetched ..nice work
NICE WORK AS WELL AS NICE BIO OF YOURS,,, GOOD COMPOSITION OF THE POEM , ALL ALONE, SIMILAR TO THE ONE ''I AM ALONE'' WHICH IS WRITTEN BY ME..
KEEP ON WRITING AND READING TOO..
Posted 8 Years Ago
NICE WORK AS WELL AS NICE BIO OF YOURS,,, GOOD COMPOSITION OF THE POEM , ALL ALONE, SIMILAR TO THE ONE ''I AM ALONE'' WHICH IS WRITTEN BY ME..
KEEP ON WRITING AND READING TOO..
Oh wow! I think this would be perfect for a song!
Keep up the amazing work!
Posted 8 Years Ago
Oh wow! I think this would be perfect for a song!
Keep up the amazing work!
i think you should keep it up this is a vary good start to a song hope to hear the finished product i bet it will be awesome
Posted 9 Years Ago
i think you should keep it up this is a vary good start to a song hope to hear the finished product i bet it will be awesome
This poem has some intense feelings portrayed in it. This is good work! Keep it up :)
Posted 9 Years Ago
This poem has some intense feelings portrayed in it. This is good work! Keep it up :)
Very nice. Like the flow of it. But I can't help but feel like it's...missing something. I don't know what, but I kind of had a "cliff hanger" moment.
But that's just my opinion hey.
Great job buddy
Aphy
Posted 9 Years Ago
Very nice. Like the flow of it. But I can't help but feel like it's...missing something. I don't know what, but I kind of had a "cliff hanger" moment.
But that's just my opinion hey.
Great job buddy
Aphy
Here in the dark
I can't take
Remembering days
That have passed away
Out on my own
Fading away
That'd be the most
That my heart could take
Why did you leave
Me behind
Thinking of you
As I watch the sky
I can't move on
Not now
Memories of us
Tearing me down
"Now the dark clouds are holding on.
Your face tattoos on my memories
and I'm swimming in dark dreams and wishing for lost places."
I like the poem. I could feel the song. I added a few words. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote
Posted 9 Years Ago
Here in the dark
I can't take
Remembering days
That have passed away
Out on my own
Fading away
That'd be the most
That my heart could take
Why did you leave
Me behind
Thinking of you
As I watch the sky
I can't move on
Not now
Memories of us
Tearing me down
"Now the dark clouds are holding on.
Your face tattoos on my memories
and I'm swimming in dark dreams and wishing for lost places."
I like the poem. I could feel the song. I added a few words. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote
Love this...nice one..shadowkai
Posted 9 Years Ago
Love this...nice one..shadowkai
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17 Reviews
Added on October 28, 2015
Last Updated on October 28, 2015
Author
Shadowkai Rochester, NY
About
I am a 16 year old writer, i will be posting one to two poems each day. On every Monday i will post additions to "The End of Humanity" and every Wednesday i will add to "Bane of The Darkness". Fridays..
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