My Neighbors are Vampires

The new nieghbors have moved in today
and the situation is quite dire.
But no one seems to care
that our neighbors are vampires!

I watched from my bedroom window
as they moved their furniture in
There were bats, coffins, forggy things,
and furry animals with fins.

My mother must have gone crazy
when she invited them over for dinner.
For what she doesn't realize
is that we're going to be their supper.

Both of my parents are running around
attempting to put everything in it's place.
But our doom is drawing near
and there is no time to waste.

So I have taken it upon myself
to prepare for this disaster
by nailing crosses to the walls
and stringing garlic from the rafters.

I know right away when they have arrived
once I hear the doorbell ring,
letting loose the screeching tone
of my mother's singing.

The vampire family is properly welcomed
as soon as they have been invited,
with their black hair and swishy capes
billowing behind them.

My mother beckons them to sit
around our family table
while my father flicks on the lights
and turns off the cable.

My parents fill all the drinking glasses
as our nieghbors sit as a group.
And while no one is watching
I slip holy water into their soup.

But I was soon devistated
for this fact you see,
that never once did they touch
their soup in front of me.

Not a bite did they eat
nor of beverage did they drink.
Time was quickly running out
so I needed to hurry and think.

Each plan that I formed
and put into action
was quickly extinguished
in under a fraction.

Soon it came time
for the vampires to leave.
But all was not lost
for I had one last plan up my sleeve.

My parents sent me to my bed
a few minutes later.
Then I snuck out of my room
by use of a ladder.

I tiptoed through the darkened lawn
dressed head to toe in black.
If I was seen I do not know
for I did not dare look back.

Many creatures lurk about
in the dark of night,
such as ghouls, ghosts, and zombies
that would give anyone a fright.

Witches, too, are known to fly
across the lighted moon,
with bats beside them circling
around the enchanted brooms.

Carefully consealed from tree to bush,
hiding as best I could,
I finally arrived at my destination
where the vampires house stood.

I peeked into the windows,
I looked under the door,
but all that I could see was emptiness,
no more.

Where had all the coffins gone?
What happened to all the bats?
What happened to all the furry things?
Where was everything at?

Once I made my way inside
with the window securly closed,
I quickly shut my flash light off;
I did not want to become exposed.

Around the couch and under the chairs
I made my way through the house.
I almost screamed aloud when I saw
a shoe turn into a mouse.

From there on in the strangest things
kept poping up out of nowhere.
There were even tap dancing roaches
and purple frogs wearing underwear.

My mind could not think
and my eyes could barely believe
all the weirdness and the slime
that was happening around me.

There were green and orange penguins
stirring a foaming cauldron
while enormous rats played tag
just like a group of children.

Through the kitchen and down the stairs
leading to the cellar,
grayish-white fog quickly rose
with the speed of ten propellers.

The thick fog surrounded me;
I could not see a thing.
Then as quickly as it came
it pushed away like a swing.

The atmosphere was much darker
for I could barely see.
But in the room were the coffins;
in total there were three.

Beside the coffins were three objects
laying on a coffin-side table.
I quietly pocketed my findings
and ran with all I was able.

I huffed and puffed up to my room.
I closed and locked my door.
I drew my curtains and emptied
my treasure onto the floor.

The vampires' teeth lay before me,
their weapons at my feet.
I no longer had to be afraid
that we would be our neighbors' feast.

Reviews

[Alz Alz]

GREAT poem! I loved it because it really traps the reader. I mean that it makes the reader want to keep reading! Great job sucking me in! FANTASTIC! :)

[Autumn Alvira]

i like this i think you might win the funny contest

[Seracies]

Your poem made me smile all the way through, I enjoyed reading it with all the well thought out humour. Very clever.

[L.G. Knight]

There are a couple places where the rhyme and rhytrhm get off just a tad but the story is so very CUTE that it makes up for it. Very cute entry into my "With a Moral 2" contest. Just one question... What was the moral of the story?

[Kortni]

This was/is funny and briliant :]

[Anastasia Starlena]

This was so funny and probly the most wittiest pieces I have read in awhile.

[Hayame]

I loved this poem, it was creative and funny. The only suggestion that I have is that you proof read for spelling errors. :) Keep up the good work!