Churbo the Chipmunk

It’s a cat’s world.

My human name is Turbo. I’m a cat. The human Serge maintains my house up here at the top of Dirt Mountain.

He is a pretty good servant overall. Like all humans, too slow to respond to the various cat needs. But humans are the best species we’ve ever found to be servants. They’ll have to do.

If you want to know why humans call me Turbo, you’ll have to ask the idiot Serge. Don’t ask me to explain human behavior. I’ve decided they really don’t know what they are doing most of the time.

Humans wouldn’t be able to pronounce my real name. They make weird noises all day and pretend like it is language. We cats just laugh at them. Of course, humans laugh so funny they can’t even recognize cat laughter.

Serge has failed to provide me with adequate entertainment, so I must come up with my own. In fact, I’ve adopted one of the chipmunks that live in the back yard. He is my pet. I’ve named him Churbo. Just to show Serge he’s not the only one that can come up with stupid pet names.

Churbo and I play games all day long. Sometimes I sit by his hole in the ground and wait for him to come out. Sometimes I’ll chase him around the yard. Usually I don’t catch him. That’s not as fun as just chasing him.

When I get bored with chasing Churbo, I’ll catch him, very carefully, and carry him to the back porch. I’ll let him go, then climb up to my cat perch. From there, I can sit and watch as he runs around trying to find his way out. That is a lot of fun.

The porch has two doors, covered with weighted nylon screens. People and cats are big enough to push the screens out of the way and can come and go as they please. Chipmunks and birds don’t seem to be able to figure it out by themselves.

So while Serge tries to impress girls on the internet, I watch Churbo run around and try to get off the porch. Eventually Serge will figure out what is going on and intervene on Churbo’s behalf.

He will get the net he uses to clean out the ponds and try to catch Churbo. That is the best part of the whole show. Humans are way smarter than chipmunks. But chipmunks are way faster than humans. That makes it almost an even match.

Eventually Serge will win but Churbo will get out of the net many times before he gets out the door. This last time, the rodent actually jumped out of the net, and Serge caught him again in mid-air. Serge is getting old be he’s still got it.

Most humans don’t appreciate how much we cats do for them. Serge is mad whenever he has to catch and release Churbo, but it gives him good exercise. His doctor is always telling him he needs more of that. So I do what I can to help.

Well, I’m bored with Churbo. Where are Birdbo and Rabbitbo?