Are You Done?

The Rhapsody of Iris Kelly continues. Milliardo goes to meet Iris's mother, hoping for the best, but as he is accustomed to by now, nothing ever goes according to plan.

The next day arrived faster than I had hoped for, but it arrived nonetheless. As things turned out, Angel decided that she wanted to come along. Ever the one to think about things before I eventually realize them, she pointed out that it would look better to go as a couple than just a guy with an underage girl and claim that said underage girl has slept overnight there. Iris Kelly said it was “whatever” and so I gave the Angel a brief briefing about the current situation and shortly after nine in the morning we all left together.

            It had stopped raining, but it was still cold, cloudy and windy. The ground was still wet and the aroma of wet foliage permeated the air.

            There wasn’t much to say I guess so the walk was made longer and more awkward by the silence. Hope springs eternal, however, and I tried to stay optimistic that this would all blow over smoothly.

            “You know,” said Iris Kelly as we reached her house, “you don’t have to talk to her, you know…”

            “Yeah,” I said, “but here I am. Here we are so…let’s do this.” Besides, I already called late for work. I knocked on the front door. After a few minutes, I was presented with my first dilemma.

            “Who is it?” called a man’s voice. I hadn’t really thought about how to introduce myself so I hesitated.

            “Is Iris’s mother home?” For me, Angel coolly picked up the slack. I thought she was going to let me do all the talking and play the quiet one today.

            The door soon opened revealing a man. The man I presumed to be the “William” in question that Iris Kelly considered her personal enemy because his head was indeed as shiny as a waxed floor. It was the only thing I managed to get a really good look at, but I wonder what he thought of us: an unimpressed youth with red hair, an uncomfortable young woman with long wavy hair and of course Iris Kelly who turned her whole body in a completely different direction.

            “Dude…c’mon…” I said reflexively. Even in my days as a delivery boy, I’ve never seen had the displeasure of being greeted by a man wearing only his briefs.

            “Back so soon, huh? I knew you were weak.” The man said obviously to Iris Kelly, ignoring us. “C’mon, get inside.”

            “Whoa,” I interjected, “Who are you?”

            “Who am I?” the man repeated. “Who are you?”

            “Is her mother here or not? We’d like to speak to her…or preferably someone with some clothes on.” I mean, really, do you feel nothing from the cold? I don’t know, but there’s just something about this guy that I don’t like.

            “Well…heh she’s even less dressed than me right now…” the man chuckled. “Now, how can I help you?”

            “Where did you come from?” The words just blurted out before I could think to stop them. “Don’t talk about someone’s mother like that!”

            “You tellin’ me what to do pipsqueak? I talk about whoever and whatever I please and there’s nothing you can do about it. You’re not strong enough either.”

            At this point, as we were getting into an argument, the Angel piped up again. “It’s whomever.” she corrected

            “What?” the man asked confused.

            “‘I talk about whomever and whatever’ not ‘whoever.’” Angel explained reminding me that she had indeed become a full-fledged grammar Nazi. Really, Angel, of all things to correct him on, you start with that?

            William turned his attention to Angel now and stared at her. If I wasn’t such a man of character, I would have acted a different way to someone ogling my girlfriend without any sense of trying to hide it. Thing is, though, there was nothing to be jealous about.

            Unfettered, Angel continued speaking, “We can’t let Iris Kelly go to you or anyone who’s not her legal guardian anyway. That’s why we need her mother present…” With cool words, she deescalated the situation and the hostility in the air evaporated.

            Perhaps because he was getting cold or maybe like all guys (not me), easily persuaded by beautiful woman, he backed off. “Hold.” he said as he closed the door part way and retreated back inside. As soon as he did, Angel shared some words with Iris Kelly.

             …I’ll admit that only hearing things from word of mouth, the only thing I was willing to believe completely was that Iris Kelly was upset. Clearly, there were some overt problems here. What a piece of work…

            “Milliardo, we’re not in grade school anymore.” chided Angel. “Well, you were never as expressive then, but don’t let it get to you know. People like that just want to see you get wound up. It’s their only joy in life.”

            “Yeah, yeah…I just can’t stand bullies, though.” A loser I am, but I still some pride left.

            “Neither do I.” Angel agreed.

            A short while later, the door opened once again and this time it was a woman. “Angel Rose” I remembered the full name on the package that I was to deliver so long ago. So this is what she looked like. She had long black hair and which reached her shoulders and blue eyes. She was wearing a bathrobe and slippers, but I don’t think it was enough for this kind of weather…not that it mattered much anyway since it was just as hard to look at her as well with that shiner under her left eye.

            “The hits just keep on coming.” I thought and only thought. I guess that’s why the man answered and not her.

            “I’m Iris’s mother. Is there something wrong?”

            “Actually, there is.” I answered. “My name’s Milliardo and this is Angel, my girlfriend. Iris Kelly came over last night pretty much without any warning so we just wanted to come meet you and let you know.”

            “Oh…um, I’m sorry. I thought she was having a sleepover with some friends…”

            “Right, well, she was. Those friends were us, we just didn’t know that.” I wanted to question her if she just let Iris Kelly run off without talking to anyone of the people she was letting daughter “sleep over” with, but I missed my opportunity to throw that in…actually, I was still hoping for some kind of peaceful resolution to this.

            “Well, she didn’t break anything did she or cause you any trouble?”

            “No, no, she was fine, really…” I said.

            “So….what’s the problem, then?”

            “That man.” Before I could answer, Angel did so before me. Just from that, I could tell she was a little fired up. Whenever Angel gets upset, I noticed, she becomes much more challenging, directing blame to an actual person rather than just referencing the problem. Well, by now, I’m sure she gets the picture.

            “Excuse me?” asked the other Angel.

            “The problem is that man, your boyfriend. Iris came over because she doesn’t feel safe around him.”

            The woman went silent for a long time. It was the same silence the police would get after caught in a lie. The next thing she said I can say shocked everyone.

            “Then…why don’t you keep her?”

            “What?” It’s rare when the Angel is caught off guard.

            “I know what you’re trying to say.” said the woman defensively. “Only God can judge me. If you think you can do a better job, how about you give it a try?” She turned towards Iris Kelly who had covered her face with her palm. “How about it, Iris? These two seem like they can give you the happy family I obviously can’t give you.”

            “Hey, hey, hey! Iris Kelly isn’t some puppy you can give away! You’re her mother, act like it.”

            “Adopted mother.” The woman firmly corrects me. “I’m not her real mother.”

            “Then that’s even worse.” said Angel. Though she appeared calm, she was definitely furious. “Even if you aren’t her real mother, you don’t get a pass. In fact, you have even more responsibility. When you adopt someone, you are promising them that they’ll get a happy life or at the very least a better one. That ‘thing’ you have on your eye is a bully and you are its enabler. I don’t care what you do with your life, it’s yours to ruin if you wish, but when you have bigger responsibilities like children that choice isn’t yours to make anymore.”

            Whoa! Now that’s what you call a sound argument, even I was starting to feel a little bad. I was feeling rather proud too, because I would have just called her an idiot. The other Angel, however, was not as impressed.

            Flatly, she asked, “Are you done?” and the Angel nodded her head not out of resignation, but with a firm resolution. “Good. Now, please leave. Iris, let’s go.” She grabbed Iris and began pulling her inside.

            “Hey.” I began to protest, but Angel, just grabbed my sleeve and pulled on it. Remembering what she had said a few hours ago, I reluctantly kept my mouth shut and the door in front of me slammed shut with the sound of it locking ending the encounter.