"I'll consider it!"

A discussion about love between Milliardo and Angel.

“The world we live in is one where the skies are perpetually gray and there is always a cold and unforgiving wind blowing over the desolate landscape. Think 'nuclear winter' and you've pretty much got the idea. It's just a cold, dark place and there's no light at the end of the tunnel.”
This is the thing known as 'Truth' in this world. It must really be a nice thing to be able not to notice. I think I finally understand what “ignorance is bliss” seriously means.
“God, I hate love stories.” I close the book in front of me and set it to the side. “...Why leave the guy if you're just going to allow yourself to be kidnapped and basically get raped by the guy and somehow still come to the conclusion that you love him. Why?! How?! The guy's a moron for going that far, but the girl's just as stupid for going along with him.”
This rant of mine has been going on for about forty five minutes now. It's the end of the day, work is over and so I now find myself with nothing to do, as usual. Unusual, though, is that today I have an audience.
“I mean...aren't we in a love story, though?” With hair as fluffy as a sheep dog's and a body that could rival that of a supermodel, the Angel has decided to take time out of her busy schedule to pay me a visit.
“No, not really. Maybe for you, yeah, but for me it's like everything just suddenly happened. There was no Stockholm syndrome involved. Love makes fools out of people. Absolute fools.”
“...Milliardo...those books are supposed to be depressing, you know?” Angel says. “Why not read something funny and cheerful for once?”
“I do; I have! I'm just saying....life is depressing like that and these books are -however exaggerated- a more realistic portrayal of that.”
Angel turned her finger on herself. “What about me? Do I make you happy or do I make you sad?”
Looking at it, there's a girl sitting on my bed isn't there? To her, I considered just saying as expected of me, I deeply considered it.
“I don't know about happy, but you do certainly make this sad world a little more tolerable.”
“How would you rate me?”
“...Wait, what? What did you just say?”
“I said, how would you rate me? You know, like how good of a job do I do “making your sad world just a little more tolerable?”
“Oh, uh, I dunno. I don't have standards so...” I shrug my shoulders. “You're doing fine as you are. Don't try any harder, please.”
This seemed to please her as the Angel grinned and leaned back. “What did you think I said?” she asked suddenly.
“Huh? You're asking me that now?”
“Yeah.”
“...No, no, don't worry about it. It's fine, really.” I casually sweep the matter aside and distance myself from that conversation by standing up and putting away some of the books I left laying around.
“Where did you get all these books, Milliardo?” asks a curious Angel.
“Uh, from a book store, Angel. Others were free though and I just picked them up.”
“I was curious because I'm a literature major, but I don't have any clue where any book store is. I just borrow from the library.”
“Well, I'm basically getting paid to walk around so I'm familiar with various locations. Makes shopping a heck of a lot easy.”
“Do you mind if I borrow one from time to time.”
“Sure, why not? Go ahead. I finished reading most of them anyway.”
It's only because I realize that I only said that hoping she would come over to my way of thinking that I feel a little bad. Talking with Angel manages to distract me from my depressing thoughts. It's only a temporary solution, though.
I guess...this is what they also mean when they say, “misery needs to company.” I'm a loser through and through....and knowing is half the battle.
“...I don't get it really. Maybe you can explain it to me.”
“What's the matter, Milliardo? Do you want to fight over our ideals?”
It's the things she says sometimes that sound like she's making fun of me and she has this grin that is everything but laughing at me and yet her eyes and the tone of her voice tell me she's being dead serious.
“I don't have anything as pointless as 'ideals.'” I answer her seriously anyway while staring at a book cover.
Angel stifles a yawn and closes her eyes. “Hmm, why do you care, Milliardo?” she asked. “What do seek to confirm by reading so many love stories, anyway? The reason why they're so the romance genre is so popular is because we all want that thing called 'happiness' even if it is only a small fraction of somebody else's. Now, why are you so unable to accept that?”
“...What's their to accept? There's nothing good to be had from an illusion. People '”fall in love” all the time and come to regret it later. Why regret something so...special? Then there are people who casually fling around or whatever it is people do these days.”
“There are elderly couples who have been together since they were kids and widowers who have refused to marry again because there will be no other spouse for them in life.” argues the Angel. “True love does exist. You have just got to believe.”
“Yeah, but why does it seem so ugly to me? Why is it that you only ever hear about these things?”
“I love you, Milliardo” what do you feel when I say that?”
What is this psychology?
“You're having a serious discussion with the love of your life over his personal...problems over the very concept of love. That doesn't bother you?”
Opening her eyes, Angel doesn't bother mincing words, “ You are the love of my life, Milliardo. You being my boyfriend is a mere formality. Fact is, you could be anywhere in the world, but you're here with me.”
“That's because I live here.”...is what popped into my head. It stayed there too, so as not to ruin the moment. Angel's special on her own so I guess saying such embarrassing things come naturally.
“You're not wrong, Milliardo.” she says sitting up. “I agree with you to a point, Milliardo. Values aren't non-existent in this day and age, they're just twisted a bit is all. If you're looking for a world where everyone has some kind of reasonable sense, then you're out of luck. I've never kissed anyone other than you, Milliardo. If you're sixteen and haven't done it, then it's seen as something abnormal you know. If you haven't had sex at twenty then you're to be poked fun at unless you're a part of some super distinguished family in which case you have a good excuse. It's a matter of values and principles, Milliardo, that's all. You probably think I'm 'normal,' but that's not the case. In this bleak, desolate landscape where the sun doesn't shine and there's always a cold wind blowing, I feel as though you're presence -whether it be real or imagined- brings me warmth.”
She got all serious there for a moment and started saying some real interesting things. Funny, though, I never expected to hear such in depth words from the Angel. At least she's got the right idea. I'm not sure what I wanted to confirm, but I feel a little better.
“...I can rely on you then?”
“As naturally as a heartbeat!” She gives me a thumbs up. “Now come give me a huuuuuuug!”
“I'll consider it!”
“MIL-LI-AR-DO!!”
“W-What's your deal? Don't shout, these walls are thinner than you think!”