That Vile Claw

That Vile Claw

My actions and words have soiled the divine,

And injected venom into pure veins.

In thought, God’s voice sounded so much like mine,

And, yet, how could God inflict so much pain?

The hand of this villain bore no nail scars;

That vile claw, soaked thick with blackest sin,

That vile claw now scratches at prison bars,

The same wicked limb that snapped in life’s winds,

And fell like the Angel of Morning Light

Onto the man’s face that shared your warm bed.

That wicked claw that set flame to the night,

Struck out like an asp, and filled you with dread.

Let that claw hang with the fruits of cursed Spring,

When, my wretched corpse, from the gallows swings.

Author's Note

sorry. I'm anything but a purist. :)

Reviews

[Kerry O'Connor]

There are more than enough purists in the world already, RG. What the world needs is innovators. And that you are, by taking a traditional form, shaking it up a little but throwing in the full rhyme scheme for good measure.
That rhyming couplet rocks!

[Kenneth The Poet]

Just blasphemous enough to make me smile. Excellent.

[Tommy]

I find that the puritans usually tie the knot for their own noose. A prison of self, I have victimized myself for a long, long time.

“Let that claw hang with the fruits of cursed Spring,
When, my wretched corpse, from the gallows swings.”

This gives a sense of a rebirth at the end of destruction. I love the feel of this, honest in its dark tone...

Great Write!
RLG,
Tommy

[.......]

Hmm, talking abouts actions here, This is amazing.

[What happened to simple..]

There's something really calm about this one.. I didn't quite expect it to be so. Hmm.

[Tim Lion]

I like this.

[Sukriti Suki]

I liked this...very deep...My actions have soiled the divine...you had my attention from the start.

[Jūdan FyreHeart]

Very nice =D Conviction behind hard truths told in poetic manner.

[Amy Bumpas]

Love this injected vile claw...hehe! Religious theme this one has,
with some dark, twisted jive twisted in....and so life wastes on...lol

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

words are meant to be reinvented~ form is meant to be malleable~ and from your mind and in your hands tales are birthed anew in newer forms to complement the evolution of human cognition~
metaphor heaven in raw iron pulse above~

[emona]

beautiful peice