Before the Fall

Before the Fall

 

I

 

They are knocking overfull tankards in an underground heaven,

And flying in war formations along the worn edges of an old tribal circle.

I understand the crackled calls of broken down street philosophers

Weeping strained blood over ten million apocalyptic bar napkin ditties.

 

I’ve felt them all.

 

 

II

 

The breathless hot wind carries visions in its trash-speckled clarity;

Long-dead victims of evils I'll never know dredged from the bottoms

Of bloody inkwells and the salt cured tear ducts of waning saints.

Night has crashed on my noonday laughter shattering every bone.

 

I never learned to crawl.

 

 

III

 

Wish I’d known this city was haunted.

I would have packed my khaki cynicism with the well-starched pleats.

Now, I’m near naked; drowning in a casual blue jean love song.

Later, they’ll find my remains and wonder what I might have been . . .

 

Before the long fall.

Reviews

[MuSe Ampoule]

The cynicism in this should tear open every known fiber of society to show it how broken it is...but society is the ocean...no matter how big a rip you make along the surface, the depths do all but laugh at you for your futility. If only people could see, the light in this might actually be effective...my thoughts on society are all stagnant like a long dried up sea. This is good work, shows us how unspectacular we are against the crush of mindless masses. At least that's my understanding.

"I never learned to crawl" But you walk just fine. Guess it's good to say that if you're smart enough, it's ok to skip a few steps.

[Amy Bumpas]

I wish I had known this writing was haunted LOL!
This piece reminds me of a war of some kind, death
promised.

[Hayley]

All of your work is a source of inspiration for me. This is very well done, I enjoyed reading it. Your words are perfectly chosen and the images you conjure up are just absolutely incredible. I love it!!

[Kerry O'Connor]

This is the most poetic of your prose pieces that I have read so far... you are really making this style your own in no uncertain terms...

As for the words, I love them all, and the emotions, I felt them all.

Lovely stuff!

[Deactivated_BurningDemo..]

I honestly have very few words to describe this. It's beautiful and twisted. Cynical and dark. I honestly think this is amazing. Just... wow.

[Jūdan FyreHeart]

Nothing quite like the facades people love to paint right over the reality of things. The rich broken tapestry of society right around us yet pretty smiles and layers of make-up solve everything right? But then, how can a single person possibly make a difference so why even bother trying..?
Awesome piece as always. Your great sense of harsh honesty and brutal cynicism shines through a fantastically written piece.

[Skoo.]

This is truly amazing, I'm lost for words... A brilliant write (:

[Robin]

I’ve felt them all.