Fireflies

Someone walked back into my life...

 

Fireflies

by alice oiseau

*

*

Fireflies tempt you.

Kill the lights you beg of me,

But I never will.

*

You plead helplessly.

Clench my arms with broken fists.

Eyes of fireflies.

*

Drink my cruelty.

Heart I have not and want not,

And yours is of rust.

*

Fireflies haunt you.

Cold, merciless fireflies

Fill your lovesick mind.

*

Now taste my poison

And lick your faded lips dry.

I know sadistic.

*

Watch the flowers wilt.

I'll meet you in our garden

For one last embrace.

*

Fireflies kill you,

Casanova Frankenstein,

Scream yourself to sleep!

*

You'll never have me.

Fireflies aren't porcelain,

So sleep tight darling.

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

The entire poem is composed of haikus.
The sinister side of Alice. Thoughts?

Reviews

[LisetteCanWrite!]

Oh wow... I really like this.. haunted by fireflies? What a metaphor... particularly your choice of wording in the last 2 stanzas.. Casanova Frankenstein.. scream yourself to sleep is brilliant.. you can feel the cold chilly reception to an unwanted love!!! Good work and look forward to reading more about you.. You make me want to read more!

[Eternally Elemental]

Wow. Just wow.

Fireflies, excellent choice. I mean REALLY excellent choice. Fireflies give the warm glow much like love but it is only a chemical reaction. Much like what is happening in the guys' heart.

Loving these lines:
"Drink my cruelty.
Heart I have not and want not,
And yours is of rust."
Drink my cruelty sounds awesome. And I love the idea of a rusty heart, oxidized over time with painful tears.

Casanova Frankenstein hahaha I love that.

You never disappoint Alice, time has no wear on your expressions. Fireflies will always be around. Amazing piece! I wrote about fireflies once but nothing like this.

*Virtual high five*

[Jared Hughes]

Again Alice, your poems fascinate me. I wonder when I will ever learn to write like you. It defintily seems dark, and you give off a sense of, as you said, your sinister side. It also inspired a story in me. Darn you, I don't have the time to write new stories! haha

Jared

[John A Common]

One word,genius.

[Honeypot]

First I LOVE Haiku! I really adore them for some reason. I think the writing looks tight and perfect. "Cassanova Frankenstein"! That was a great line and I'm going to be grinning over that one the rest of the day. All a whole the poem is full of anger and pain. Its a poem about bitterness over a loss which is revealed in particular to me in this stanza:

"Watch the flowers wilt.
I'll meet you in our garden
For one last embrace."

Yeah, I'd say its a bit sinister, but I think its great! Now, I think I may go write some Haiku myself. I feel inspired!

[Wildecat]

Very clever writing, a definite pleasure to read your poetry.

[Patricia]

I love the idea of doing a series of haikus to form one compleate poem. Its dark, but not overly dark. There are so many metaphores. Wow, so much meaning packed in.

[Silvario]

Once again, another brilliant piece. Masterfuly worded. You're an amazing writer.

[Tessa Le Rouge]

haikus!!!

i think they're just lovely. and you, my dear, lived up to my hype for them. as already stated my many reviewers, i too love your wording;
"Drink my cruelty. Heart I have not and want not, And yours is of rust."

just, overall an awesome poem. but that line in particular gets me. "and yours is of rust." i.. great job!
Two thumbs up. WAY up.

[Aimee Mahathy]

Nice choice of form! I'm never one for haiku, I don't know why, but you did it so well!
The poem, as I kept reading, really put me in the place of the one "Alice" was speaking to. The feeling behind it was so strong that I kept thinking "Huh, I'm just gonna go back to the new writing page, this doesn't feel so great." But not in the sense of bad poetry, just that feeling. Ah, it's hard to explain. But it's a good thing!
It reminded me of kind of an elaboration, or a grandiose metaphor for a false relationship. It actually reminded me a lot of a friend of mine. We're friends and all, but as far as relationships go, she's heartless. It's like she almost lures in these wounded hearts (which I gathered from the part with the "Heart I have not and want not, and yours is of rust) just to wound them some more. Spoon-feeding them pretty words, but really just torturing them. And the fireflies made me think of the faint glimmer some hopeful soul might see in the eyes of the person who is only using them. The promise of real love is so appealing, that even when they feel the pain the other person is causing, they cannot leave.
I don't know. I could be completely off the map with this, but that's how I percieved it. And as such, I have to say WOW! To think of such an elaborate metaphor and write it so well, I really admire you!
Amazing job and thank you for sharing! Please, keep it up!

[Markymark]

I caught the Haikus. I must admit though, I get lost in the abstraction. I must be trying too hard. I feel the anger, and betrayal. I feel the mood of the would be returning lover.....but some parts I'm still studying. Are the firefly's the light of love? Is that what he was so afraid of? I am very intrigued by this piece.

More later,
Markymark