When your love was not for mine

love when seems fasle from other side,this world turns into hell.

Those winds turned all wild,
when your love was not for mine,
and darkness prevailed,
where even shadows denied to acompany,
and all i could see was my tears,
because there was no one,
to wipe,
to console...

Walking down those miles,
to reach the lane where we met,
i never got tired to wait,
for summer till winter,
from bloomy trees to sheded leaves,
all displayed a hopefull stay,
which finally got all apart,
when your love was not for mine....

My love was not an epic,
to be given a place in sheets,
but rather it was,
gift of several preconceptions,
certain manupulations,
which had no ends,
which had no life,
and once did my nerve erupt,
when you love was not for mine...

Author's Note

Wrote this one after a gap of one month.do give your views.

Reviews

[Leigh]

I like the opening line the best as it tells me how you were feeling straight away. I got a great atmosphere and feeling from this poem, you have described a time, 'When' a place 'Those miles' and in the possesive a person 'Mine' and thats what brings this one home in a very powerful and direct way. I can feel your personal sadness, expressed as part of an every day occurence by millions of people, unfortunately..

[Jack Isaac]

I've felt that kind of storm when love turned the wrong way, what else could I do but hope for another day? This is a very good and inspiring poem; effective imagery of Autumn and perhaps a lead-in to the cold of Winter. Nicely written, nicely said. Thanks.

[Talismanic]

Indescribably beautiful. This is like everything that runs through the mind (and sends it mad) when its seems like no one understands - i'd never get tired to wait either :)) Please do not change the title, it has its own distinctive meaning and accent. The broken rhthym that comes out of free verse - a stream of emotions weaved through images - conveys so much sadness and depth. Rare purity.

[Cathy Wattam]

A nice emotive poem here but quite a few errors. Check your work carefully before publishing to avoid mistakes. Otherwise, a very good poem, I enjoyed it thanks. Great title too :-)

[Ink Angel]

Wonderful! lovely flow, nice imagery, will email you :)

[CHRIS ANDES]

I guess what you mean in the last line is 'when your love'.
=]
this is a great piece of love

[Tai Ryens]

The opening is cleverly written and the rest of the poem is well thought out. I spotted quite a few grammatical errors, especially around the second stanza, and you should proofread it and correct them. There is also a typo on the last line. You have much potential for being a writer, but you also could hone your skills with grammar. Well done, if I may say so myself. Good job.

[Queen Empress]

a very Beautiful poem! i really love the lines " i never got tired to wait".:)) a really heart breaking poem keep it up :))

[Pritesh]

Amazing poem!excellently done!keep writing writing more poems like this!

[reflectingus]

Definitely an honest description of heartbreak and unrequited love. Dark emotions tend to come out and replace the pleasant ones, and I must say, your descriptions are strong and vivid, perfectly portrayed an epitome of sadness and despondency. However, I do think there are minor grammatical errors. I'm not all that good with grammar myself, but for me, "when your love was not for mine" didn't sound quite right, I think it should be "when your love was not mine", because I can see you need the "mine" there for the rhyme, so the line should also make sense. Other than that, flawless beauty, enjoyed reading.