Late Night Park Walk

I took a walk in the park last night

It was awfully quiet

But as I walked I came to discover

A rather intriguing scene

It was more gruesome than anything

You couldn't match up to it

As I watched her standing there

I froze in place

Upon her lips were pieces of flesh

Still freshly grown off the bones

Of human bones

Of people

So when I asked her what she was doing

She turned to me and simply said

"Drinking the blood of the innocent"

So I ran away

Author's Note

More like gag horror

Reviews

[Frank]

I have read several of your poems. To me you are inventing imaginary scenarios and try to convey a wishy washy kind of dream like quality. The problem is there are so many of these on the internet, most by young people, that's not to say all young people write poorly, some do write quality work.

If you live in Japan, or wherever you live, try to write of what you know. If you live in a ghetto in the Bronx, tell us what it is and about the problems and the delights there, we really wish to know. Why would we be interested in fairy stories, we had so many when children. Maybe you are writing for children, I don't know.

I would like to read a poem from you that is about your experience, something I can write a review on. You asked for my opinion and I gave it.

[Jonas]

This is a little childish and I believe you can do better. Good luck.

[Rivaxorus]

This poem was meant to be childish, it's supposed to be non serious.

[Jonas]

Different isn't always better.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

A most telling piece that leads one astray really, well done, good read.

[Sami Khalil]

A very good one Seimei... The ending was sooo good...:).....................