a thing of beauty

i was always told
of a delicacy
and a sensitivity
to be found
in the minutest of brush strokes
and the finest of pencil lines.
i wrote,
i like to make things of beauty
a pleasure to my eyes.
but that is not enough
for the man in the blue overalls.
he needs to see
i'm taking a chance.
with charcoal
he smeared over my fine lines,
then with emulsion
he made a dummy mask,
obscured my eyes.
i nearly cried.
you just
need
to be
more
experimental,
eleanor.
i honed the charcoal smears
and kept back tears.
though my face flushed red.
breathed.
i had a water bottle,
and i took a sip.
used water and pencil,
to find my blackened lips.
dug at the emulsion
to find my eyes.
and there it was,
a thing of illustrative beauty.

grey and watery,
just like me.