The kernel

the kernel has cracked open. 

the hollow sea shell 

blown back into life.

the woman, resolute and wan

in a crying heap 

on the floor. 

layer upon layer of protection

finally unravelled. 

he says i'm not ruined

and i'm starting to believe him. 

because this heart does still feel. 

all the times 

i stopped it from singing.

and if you could hear it 

from where you are 

it would say:
i have wanted you 

since i learned what it was to know you. 

now, i tell you, 

i have been betrayed.

all those days

of restraint.

when you left

i kept you to myself 

hoarded you like a treasured jewel 

to bring out from my pocket
when nobody was looking
and admire in the darkness that surrounded me. 

we never said

(we didn't have to say)

and i am ruined, in a way

for other men

who could never compare

i would give anything for you

to kiss my hair 

and rock me like a lost child.

but i will have to go on wanting.

Reviews

[W.k.kortas]

You! Of all people. Your work hasn't lost a step.

[Dreadblocks]

Pretty moving. It felt like something between the longing of something lost and the want of something that will never be had, or had again. There's tragedy there, and the sense of that came through, as well as the reluctance of having to move forward, even when you're basically forced to by circumstance and inevitability. I hope that you continue to write, because it's clear that you can convey.