The first thing, which comes to my mind when I read this piece is..how much each word carry a strong emphasis, how much sadness it radiates. Each word here is so expressive and even screaming for itself. We are in this reality, but somehow we are not. As if you are painter, who is writing and in the same time painting the words. I love how the beginning sounds, the way you create the broken image, the feeling in it, your own emotions...is just great. The person, close and far in the same time, is like resolving in a black and white picture, a shade. I like most:
Your mind is ill
Your body
An aching shell
Insisting on
Keeping
The remains of a man
Alive
A man who once was
Living
Thank you for all your lovely reviews. They are each thorough and feeling. It means a lot to me, you.. read moreThank you for all your lovely reviews. They are each thorough and feeling. It means a lot to me, you take your time here :)
10 Years Ago
Thank you too, dear Selma! I`m not so good and I review rarely, but I like your poems much!
10 Years Ago
It makes me appreciate it even more, knowing you rarely write a review. I favor yours over many, bec.. read moreIt makes me appreciate it even more, knowing you rarely write a review. I favor yours over many, because you are detailed and feel me well. I like your writing too, and shall come by for more reads! :)
I often wonder if it is even a natural process...or just another byproduct of this world..and the tampering we have done to her. You are not alone in this, Michelle. A mind may forget, but a soul, a heart..ever remembers.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thank you, Vince. Your words are a comfort :) and I do not believe that dementia only is a natural i.. read moreThank you, Vince. Your words are a comfort :) and I do not believe that dementia only is a natural incidence occurring by old age. Certain chemicals from the outside can have that affect on man.
The first thing, which comes to my mind when I read this piece is..how much each word carry a strong emphasis, how much sadness it radiates. Each word here is so expressive and even screaming for itself. We are in this reality, but somehow we are not. As if you are painter, who is writing and in the same time painting the words. I love how the beginning sounds, the way you create the broken image, the feeling in it, your own emotions...is just great. The person, close and far in the same time, is like resolving in a black and white picture, a shade. I like most:
Your mind is ill
Your body
An aching shell
Insisting on
Keeping
The remains of a man
Alive
A man who once was
Living
Thank you for all your lovely reviews. They are each thorough and feeling. It means a lot to me, you.. read moreThank you for all your lovely reviews. They are each thorough and feeling. It means a lot to me, you take your time here :)
10 Years Ago
Thank you too, dear Selma! I`m not so good and I review rarely, but I like your poems much!
10 Years Ago
It makes me appreciate it even more, knowing you rarely write a review. I favor yours over many, bec.. read moreIt makes me appreciate it even more, knowing you rarely write a review. I favor yours over many, because you are detailed and feel me well. I like your writing too, and shall come by for more reads! :)
This is a great poem Selma :) The word choice and the rhythm makes it flow beautifully and it describes such a specific situation with a slight level of ambiguity which lets the reader interpret the poem in a way that fits directly with their own experiences. Well done! I truly mean it :)
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
I appreciate your opinion of this write. It is so kind. Thank you deeply, Aaron. :)
This is so beautiful, hurting and the same time, feeling one with the one you write this for... A still life portrayed here, for he, knows, and feels, but can't maybe remember, but that "Energy" you spread, through your life energy too the death, and actions, is always felt, in what state of concious or mind it will be picked up, and I feel this poem, to the gut, of where I once was...... ;-) you are so beautiful my fellow writer.
You have no idea, how great this poem is, also was. remains, and will be forever. And he'll knows also feel your beautiful energy.... thank you for sharing this masterwork. I do treasure this one, for I can only admire, pain through beauty.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Zaviera, I appreciate you for taking the time to read this one and for giving me such a beautiful re.. read moreZaviera, I appreciate you for taking the time to read this one and for giving me such a beautiful review! This particular piece was not easy to write. You see right through the words and into me.. Thank you :)
10 Years Ago
You are most welcome, I feel your heart, and it's on the right place. Thank you for sharing your wor.. read moreYou are most welcome, I feel your heart, and it's on the right place. Thank you for sharing your work of art. - ZZ
What a beautifully saddening poem. Love every line but what really broke my heart was the end;
"And my hands are getting weary, you are weary and it feels wrong"
I sighed to let it all sink in once i was done reading it.
Great job :)
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thanks, Spacecadet :) I'm real glad it had such an effect on someone.
This is probably one of the more beautiful poems around here. I could relate really well to it, because if this poem means what I think it means, then I want to tell you that those people never go away. This probably sounds odd, but I've experienced it myself, and those dreams you dream about them can be so real that you can't differentiate them from reality. They're forever with you, you just need to let go. Let go, and they'll come back to you, float back into your mind, into your dreams. Thank you for sharing such a lovely piece! :)
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
It doesn't seem odd to me at all. I do agree with your saying, the ones who leave us, never truly do.. read moreIt doesn't seem odd to me at all. I do agree with your saying, the ones who leave us, never truly do. Sometimes, however, feelings overwhelm. Thank you for taking the time to read and review this poem. I will definitely remember your fine words. I'm grateful, Devesh :)
10 Years Ago
Feelings are where most of our poems stem from , that's very true. You needn't be grateful, we're al.. read moreFeelings are where most of our poems stem from , that's very true. You needn't be grateful, we're all here to help each other grow! :D
Sometimes sadness is best captured in words, I think you've done a beautiful job in expressing what it means to be in love and those struggles. Captivating, bold and true, I give you two thumbs up!
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thank you for that. I'm grateful x
Those, who don't see us anymore, we carry in our hearts, and there opens a new world, were touch, and love, and reunion is born again... invisible in this world, not in the other one... those dreams, are nearer than you think sweet Michelle... you just have to close your eyes... they are always with us.
This is beautiful poetry, I have goosebumps all over, and need to save it, for it touches me, to read more than the 5 times I did read it already. Thank you dear one.
- Elisa
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
I'm so honored by you, grateful for every word you've given me. I won't forget. I thank you from my .. read moreI'm so honored by you, grateful for every word you've given me. I won't forget. I thank you from my heart x
10 Years Ago
You are very welcome sweetheart. This poem, is in my core from now on... and I will come back to rea.. read moreYou are very welcome sweetheart. This poem, is in my core from now on... and I will come back to read it again, and feel it.... xxx
I'm Michelle. To strangers I may seem reluctant, but I'm really quite open towards those that are patient and genuinely interested in getting to know me. I think a lot. I'm hardly ever bored. I've.. more..