Temporary Fix

The last fix is running clear

Straight into my mind

Drowning out my thoughts
leaving me trailing behind

But while I am slowing up

I am also speeding down

Crashing harder and faster

Heading to a place inside

One that I can only find

With the guidance from each fix

Through intoxicated eyes

I can view the world

In a new kind of light

Shed by a drug-induced mind

Where perceptions aren’t the same

And morals have no place

Reality doesn’t show her face

She keeps her pain away

Blocked by my artificial blockade

And while I hide out

In my delusion

I know the world is trying

To break me free of my

Inebriated illusion

And all the while

I can feel

My defense slipping away

Creeping at first

Out of my system

Then streaming at once

To a different place

And reality hits me

Sobers me completely

Smashing my body

Painfully

Taking place of my quick fix

Paying me a permanent visit

She’s here to stay

Becoming twice the weight of the world

I tried to escape

Temporarily

Because I ache for more

Of my sweet iron walls

My liquid refuge

That lived inside my veins

And the hunger won’t let go

And I won’t let go

Because I know

That another moment of safety lies

Just one fix away

And will remain

One fix out of my reach

Because forever I will remain

Outside of blurry walls

My weak foundation

Has been shattered

My addiction to escape

My craving for the darkest light

Is only a temporary

For my long time problem

That my short term progression

Cannot withstand…

The weapon to fight against

This lingering oppression

Is only temporary…

And it only last a little while

And when it comes back

It’s worse

And then I regret my existence

And my cowardice

And my decision

To use the easy way out

To ease my troubled mind

When all I had to do

Was lay it all aside

And believe that I could try

And succeed and defeat

Reality

Without the intoxication

Without a drug induced mind

Without my temporary fix

 

Reviews

[zig]

"Taking place of my quick fix

Paying me a permanent visit

She's here to stay

Becoming twice the weight of the world"

some really great lines in this poem, you express the intensity of adddiction well. are you familliar with the song "close the dorr" by fugazi? this poem kind of reminded me of that. great read. zig