Chapter 3

Chapter 3- Don't let go.I'm not ready yet.

"Morning Sunshine. It's Tuesday. Your last day of freedom. Tommorow school starts for you. Get up Layla." I heard Seth's voice say in my ear. "Seth, go away. We aren't a couple. I told you to think about it. Let me sleep. Want to be helpful? Go watch the kids and let me sleep." I said annoyed. I rolled over and heard footsteps and the door slam shut. "come on kids. Let's eat breakfast without your mommy this morning." I heard. I was hurt then. Seth did care, and I was just shutting him out. I groaned and got out of bed. "Breakfast isn't breakfast if it's not with you guys Mommy." I said coming up behind the table. Seth flashed a small smile and I sorta grinned back. "MOMMY! YAY!" I heard all three of my kids scream. I told them to lower their voices and sat down at the table. We all ate and talked about cartoons. Blues Clues. They told me all about this soccer episode. It made seth laugh so hard milk came out of his nose. which made me laugh really hard. It was so darn funny.

"Seth." I said when we were doing dishes. "No Layla. Don't. I know." He said back to me. I had no idea what he thought I meant. "Seth. Please. I need to explain." "Layla, you've made it clear. You don't want to be a couple. why are you still tormenting me?" He said with a grim face. I grabbed his wrist and kissed him hard on the mouth. "That's what I was trying to tell you. I do want to be. I need you. I don't know you. But you showed up for a reason. I need you Seth. I really do." I said fast so he couldn't interupt me. He stood there speechless. "So your my girlfriend now?" He said. I laughed, "Now who says lame words. Yes stupid. I'm your girl." He nodded and hugged me close.

The rest of the day went easy and I got a good night's sleep. I woke up the next morning to breakfast in bed. I smiled and saw that the babysitter was watching the kids already. I kissed Seth goodbye and headed off to my doom. School. Oh jesus, what was I doing. "You are showing the world you aren't like every other mother. You aren't a dropout. you can do all of it and pass with flying colors." A voice in my head told me cooly. I stepped inside the building and went to the office immediatly. "Welcome back Miss Reedman." The assiant princpil said to me. "why, thank you."I said in return. I exited the office, and walked out into the halls. Already, I was getting stares. I started wondering why. Is it because my mom and brother died? Is it because I didn't go to school for a few weeks. Is it because I am a teenage mom now? Or is it because im dating Seth? Wait, they don't even know Seth. so scratch that one out.

"Hey Layla." I heard a girl say behind me. I took a deep breath and turned around to face Christina Myah. "Hi Christina. May I help you with something?" I asked. Like I said before, I didn't have any friends. So no-one in this school should be talking to me. If they were cause they pitied me, then they could take a step back and save it. I didn't need nor want the pity. I didn't want to be stared at. I wanted to be challenged, told I couldn't pull it all off, be disacourged. Just so I could show every single person that Layla Reedman can make it. And I would prove it. somehow. I would.

I walked into math. I had a competely different schedule, so it was kinda odd. I sat down at the fimilar mahonoey tinted desk. Normal sketches like "Tina is such a hoe" and "Math is stupid. PointlesS" were carved into the top. And of coure the ocasional, doodle masterpieces, and holes that people drilled straight through the desk. With pencils, pens, or whatever they could. They all didn't want to be here, so they decided to voice it. They use to get suspended for it. It happens so much now, that teachers just stopped caring. They told us last year,"We just won't buy new desks. you are stuck with all of these desks." I never really doodled on them. That is what paper is for. Today is the first day in my life, I don't have my little silver journal with me. I had to pass all my classes. It was a must. A need.

"Good Morning class. We have one of our students back today. Miss Reedman, welcome back." my teacher said smiling at me. I nodded and thanked her. I spent the class taking notes on things that made me bored. But for once, I made myself pay attention. No matter how pointless I thought it was. Math moved to Science, which moved to Lunch. Lunch moved to Art, which moved to English. Then my day was done. I was free. I picked up my bag and went out to find my car. I got behind the wheel. I just sat there for a minute. School wasn't that bad. It was actually okay. I told myself that if everyday was like this, I would be fine. I did have homework to do when I got home. When I got home, another thought clicked in my head. I still needed a job. There was a local grocery store right down the street that I had applyed for. I hadn't heard back from them yet. I was scared. I needed it so bad. It was a 3 hour slot. I would go after school. Work for 3 hours, 8.50 an hour and leave. So I would be home by dinner time. And on weekends I would work 10-6. I told them that would actually work out perfectly and gave them my application. They said they would call me. And they still haven't. Oh well. I will prepare for my rejection.

I got home and Seth was making dinner. I had never been around guys this much before, so I didn't even know guys could cook. Well, would cook. The kids heard the door shut cause they got up from painting and screamed,"LAYLA!" "Hey kiddos. Do you like the babysitter?" I said just in time to notice she wasn't there. Seth must of let her go early and watched the kids. "Yeah. She's cool! she took us to the park. And then took us to get ice. Ice cream!" Clara said with a wide smile. Peter said she was cool. And chris said she was cool. Cool for a babysitter. I laughed and gave them all a big hug. "so how was school?" Seth asked sounding like a fatherly figure, rather than my boyfriend. "It was actually okay. I don't mind going so much." I said telling the complete truth.

"The court called today." Seth told me after I had put the kids to bed that night. I took a deep breath and exhaled. "And what did they say? I hate courts. And I hate my so called father." I said trying to hold my voice steady. He looked at me for a second and said,"They are pushing the date closer. Instead of March 24th at eleven, it's on february 17th at 10:30." I sighed and just closed my eyes for a second. That was less than a month away. That was too soon. I hated that man. I hated that man so much. I took yet another deep breath. "Oh gosh. That is way to soon. But I will do whatever I have to for these kids. That is on a Saturday. okay. And did they say If I should bring the kids or not?" I asked already knowing the answer.

"Yes. You have to bring them." He said seeing my reaction. He felt that I was upset. I let a tear drop and turned away from Seth. I walked to my bathroom and locked myself in there for 2 hours. Smart thing to do, eh? Seth knocked at least every 5 minutes. But I wouldn't let him in. I was to upset. I finally unlocked the door, and he was still standing on the other side. I pulled him closly and just hugged him. He didn't say anything. And I was glad. It was January 30th. And That means a little over 2 weeks. These could be my last two weeks with my kids. What if I did lose them? what would happen to me? What would happen to them? I was lost and confused. I thought I had almost found who I really was, and now I was back to square one. I let go of Seth and lied down on my bed. Next thing I knew, I had Seth's arms around me. He pulled me close and I slowly drifted off to sleep. I was awoken what felt like hours later. "Laylabell, get up." I heard Seth's voice say. since when did he call me Laylabell? I got up, wondering why I was getting up so early. I turned over to look at the clock and it read 6:15. I groaned and then it hit me fast. School. I was going to school. And that is when I remembered the previous night. Being in a bathroom for 2 hours, crying, having Seth hold me tight.

I pulled up to school and prepared for another day of staring. I walked straight to my locker and dismissed my books from my bag to the inside shelves. I felt a tap on the back of my shoulders and groaned. I stood up and turned around with, "What the hell do you want from me?" Mckenzie Glarty was facing me with an odd look. "Well, what do you want?" I asked again feeling annoyed. "I just wanted to say hi. I know what happened and I wanted to say I am sorry." she said. I don't even know why I let her finish. I guess this time, I felt bad. "Thanks. It means, er, alot to me." I said trying to sound decent. "Well, we have the same math class now. so I can walk you." Mckenzie said her face cheering up. I smiled, and I felt it as a real genuine smile. "Thank you. I'd love to." I said to my new friend. I thought to myself. This is amazing. I have a new friend. That's not Seth. I have an actual girl friend.

 

We walked to class and we talked about normal stuff. She asked about my love life, and we talked about Seth. I felt my cheeks burn in happiness. Mckenzie smiled and said,"I'm glad you have something so real. Something to lean back on. I have been single my whole life. I hate it." I shrugged. "Well, so have I. Till now, that is. Don't change yourself. You are really pretty. You will be taken soon I bet. Just wait." I said trying to give her hope. She smiled and we took our seats. I listened to my teacher drown on in academics. But I did pay attention. Turns out, you do actually learn something in school. If you pay attention that is. Dilgentely, I made me way through the day. Mckenzie was only in my math class and in my lunch so I didn't get to talk to her much. I found in my heart, I liked having her around. I liked her vibe and her company. She was a good person. I walked to the office and asked to use the phone. I didn't have a cell phone yet, so I had to use their phone.

"Seth. Hey! I'm going to go by the library and get some books. Yeah, and do some homework. you can start dinner. Whatever is good. Thank you. Tell the kids I said hey." I said into the phone then let it drop with a bang onto the reciever. Everyone looked at me and I apologed and walked back out of the office as fast as I possibly could. I spent an hour or two at the library and then made my way home. Dinner was ready and on the table when I got home. once again, the babysitter wasn't there. But it was late, so I knew that was the reason. I then heard Seth's musical voice. "Oh layla. You have a voicemail message." I laughed and went and pressed the button to hear them. "Hi Layla Reedman. We are glad to say you got the job. You start tommorow after school. Then you work the weekend. We are saying your hours are the same we talked about. See you then!" Click. I screamed and jumped up and down so loud that Clara ran into the room. "Whats wrong Mommy?" "Clara called me Mommy, Seth. Only Peter did that once. And none of them have every done that before. Besides Peter that one time." I said ingorning clara's question. "oh, clara. go and wash up for dinner. Nothing's wrong." she nodded and ran to the bathroom. I heard a crash then a giggle and smiled to myself. "Maybe they are getting better. The death of Heather and Scott aren't as bad to them probably. you know them better than I do, so you would know for sure." Seth said mentioning my mother's real name.

I cringed at the thought of her name. And sat down at the table. Peter was seated, Chris was standing looking at the food, and clara was laughing her way to the table. I had a hyper little 2 year old. Wonderful. she got to the table and looked at me. "What's so funny clarabeara." I asked her. "Well, spongebob fell out his house's window. Because Patrick dropped his clam out the window." she told me through her giggles. "Uh,Clarabeara. you have a little too much energy." I said smiling at her. She calmed down her giggles and we said a prayer. Seth had made tacos so we all started eating. "Seth, this is really good." chris said in the midst of the silence. "Thanks Chris." Seth said obviouslely not knowing what else to say to him. I don't think he's ever had to cook for a family before. Well, he cooks on his on. He loves to cook. How cool is that?

I helped Seth do the dishes. And then took a shower. After I got out of the shower and dressed, my kids ran to me. "Mommy! Tuck us in!" Peter and Clara were saying up to me. I inhaled the word Mommy again and smiled at them. I walked them in and tucked them in. I told Chris to stop playing video games and get in bed. And that is just what he did. I thanked him and closed their door. I went back to my room and grabbed Seth by the wrist. I let our door quietly close and I pulled him close. "Hey there beautiful." he said smiling. "Hey there, smoothtalker." I said back giggling. I was in an odd mood. I kissed him on the mouth. We twirled our hands in each others as we kissed. We fell to the bed gently and I kissed him back. I pulled away for the tiniest second. "We need to be careful. The kids." I said, not being able to think of any other words. He nodded and kissed me again. I let out a 'Mmm" and he smiled. He kissed me some more and put his hands under my shirt. He started moving up and I reach and pushed his hands down. I wrapped them around my waist. And he tried a second time. I pulled away and he pulled me in and kissed me. "Don't Let go Layla. It's okay. Come on." "Seth, no. I'm not ready yet. I'm only 16. No. Not now, not soon." I said trying to stand my ground. He kissed me again, thinking that would fool me. I pushed him away. "Seth, let's call it a night. I have school then work tommorow." He kissed me again and the doorbell rang. I got up to get it and he pushed me down. There was another ring.Then a knock. Then I heard nothing. I tried to get up, but was pushed down again by Seth. He pressed his lips hard to mine. I tried to stop him but he lifted my shirt off me. Too much was going on. He was out of control. "Seth!" I screamed. He kissed down my neck and I took a deep breath. Then I kicked him off me. And I kicked him hard. He got up and scowled at me. He came up to me and grabbed me. It made my arms hurt. He kissed me once more, not shuttered by my kick. He kissed me softly that time, and I relaxed a bit and kissed him back. That was my biggest mistake of my life, for when that happened, the door opened. "Layla Reedman. How can you let your kids be in a house with this stuff? And ingore the door, and let them answer it, to have sex with your boyfriend?" the voice said. I stared in dismay and grabbed a towel.

When I finally found words, I took Peter back to bed. I walked back into the living room and sat down with my vistor. "Dad. I'm sorry." I said still wondering why he was here. "Layla. No. You should've thought about that. Good luck in court. You will defiently need it now." he said facing me. I started to cry and just walked back to my room. "Seth, you should be more responisble. What are you doing with a hag like that?" I heard my dad say to me. I ran back out in anger. "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE NOW. IF YOUR NOT OUT BY THE TIME I GET TO 5, I AM CALLING THE POLICE. GET OUT NOW." I screamed at him. Seth ran to the kids room to calm them down. I slammed the door shut as I screamed,"DO NOT COME BACK HERE." I was livid. I was crying. I walked back to my room and sat on the bed. When Seth came back I wouldn't talk. "Say something Layla." "you want me to say something? I think I may have just lost my kids."

Reviews

[Wingless Fallen Angel]

You're a really good writer. Keep it up!