Walk Away

I often find myself in the space that I’m in right now. I feel like my chest muscles are clenched. I can physically feel my heart breaking again. I can feel him distancing himself from me. It’s like he’s lost but would rather run away alone then take me along with him. I ask him what’s wrong and he always replies the same way, “nothing.” Then I make him pinky promise just hopefully to see him smile just an inch but I see nothing. I see the anger and the attitude on his face. I see that he’s going through something that once again I’m never going to know about. I feel him moving farther and farther away from me until I look over and he’s no longer beside me. He just disappears. He walks away from me when he’s hurting. But guess what, I’m hurting too. I need him and he’s just not there for me. I know he loves me and I know that he would do anything for me, but emotionally he’s not there for me. I will never feel comfortable telling him about every detail of my life because he doesn’t feel comfortable telling me about his life. I’m constantly in pain, my chest feels heavy like theirs a person standing on top of me. I constantly feel like bursting out in tears, every time I think about my life and my struggle I just want to run to my room and cry, like I use to do when I was a teenager. I just feel so alone all the time. Like all the time. Any time I want to talk about something serious I feel like it’s just too much for him to hear, yet he’s always telling me I can talk to him. I see the look on his face when I’m talking about something that he doesn’t care about. I see that he’s zoning out and just responding at the right time. There’s times when he’ll even start a conversation with someone else in the middle of my sentence. It make me feel so unimportant. I feel alone. I don’t like to feel alone. I don’t like to feel like I have no one in this world to talk to. How can I talk to someone who won’t talk to me? Why won’t he talk to me?! Why does he always choose to shut me out? What did I do so bad to deserve this? What did I do?

Reviews

[p]

Well... that was very sad. Very well written as well. I really hope this is fiction by the way.