Rebirth

I challenged myself to write a tanka. A short for of poetry with five lines with a syllable balance of (5,7,5,7,7) in each line.

New dawns bloom each year,

Filling spaces in ourselves,

Luminating dreams,

Releasing the sap inside,

Giving birth to a new us.

Reviews

[Lisasview]

Good morning,
First read of yours and I did so enjoy it.
I went through your post to find a poem and came across this one.
I am so involved in writing poems with certain syllable counts and Iambics, but i have never tried a Tanka yet.
Many of the poems I write are quite challenging. Recently posted AWAKEN..a ballad..
not easy... but I always enjoy a challenge.
I really feel you did so well this.
Your message was loud and clear.
"Filling spaces in ourselves,
Luminating dreams," love these thoughts!
You should do more....
Lisa, now in Spain

[Scott Andrews]

Thank you very much for your kind words.

I don't often write poetry anymore despite the fact that as a teenager i had notebooks full of poems. Weirdly it proved useful when I lived in Poland and worked as a lyricist for a while.

The Tanka came up on the Daily Prompt app and I liked the idea of being challenged to not waste a word. It took me about two days to finish and I really enjoyed so if you have any recommendations for any other difficult styles I would love to learn about them.

I will check out Awaken and look forward to taking a look through some of your work.

[Lisasview]

Hello again,
I will check our Tanka.
So far I have explored several styles..
Couplets,
Quatrains
French Quatren not easy
Ballad
and, using iambics in many poems that I write...
I am now writing a poem in Free Verse.
If you look back at my poems you will see at the top, authors notes, I explain in what form poem was written.
Lisa

[Scott Andrews]

Brilliant, I will do. I must admit I did write a sonnet one Christmas for my partner as she is a massive lover of Shakespeare. That was a challenge, not only to be accurate with my choice of words, but to find the right way to convey my feelings for her.

[Lisasview]

Sounds wonderful...You should post it.
Did you do 3verses, 4 lines each and a final verse with two lines and 10 sylables per line and use iambics?
Lisa

[Scott Andrews]

I did indeed, in the true Shakespearian tradition. Although lets say my use of iambics was well-intentioned but perhaps not a masterpiece. I will discus sharing it with the boss but she may want to keep it for herself.

[Pete]

well done and very telling. spring isn't just a time of renewal for nature, it's for us too -

Filling spaces in ourselves,
.
Releasing the sap inside,

indeed, let it flow like sugary maple syrup for a sweet life ... :)

[Scott Andrews]

Thank you for your kind words :)

It's funny how life works in cycles, and you never quite know what the next spring will bring.

[willweb]

That was a really nicely done Tanka and not just a collection of lines with the proper syllable count, but an extremely creative thought on top of it. Very well expressed.

[Scott Andrews]

Thank you. It isn't something I often turn my hand to but it was an intriguing challenge.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I enjoyed reading this. And kudos on adhering to the form. Sometimes I feel like all my sap has dried up inside though. We get dry and brittle as cut firewood in our old age. (smile) Well done!

[Scott Andrews]

Thank you very much. Age is indeed a cruel mistress and we have long since fallen out.