She

 

 

Who is she

This tramp that you love, this w***e that should know better

Who am I

your subservient wife, keeping my mouth shut while dying inside

Who are you

The man  that I love who now makes me question

my life, my love is it really worth this

Who is she

This woman that drives my anger and fuels my hatred

This obsession of mine, turning my soul black and my life weary

Is she worth this

this destruction and termoil, this home torn in two

What is your choice

your mind is made up, where do I fit

you want the best of both worlds but my world is destroyed

Who is she

I hope she's smart enough to hide when I find out

Reviews

[Micheal Teal]

Beautifully and brutally honest. I honour your strength and courage. Art should be truth magnified, sanctified, celebrated and embraced by our creative spirit. Well done.

Thank you for sharing this.

[Aussie]

Fantastic work! I actually flinched at that last line,believe it or not. XD
I liked how this was short and sweet,yet still very heartfelt. It really just drove everything home. I also enjoy the format.
And normally poetry that doesn't rhyme seems very bland to me and I myself can not write non-rhyming poems well; yet this was wonderful and refreshing. Surely one of my favorites I've read on here so far(:

[PaperHearts]

Wow. This was such a compelling write. I could really feel your emotion through these words, and thought that they were expressed in such a way that everyone reading this could relate to it in some way. The format of your poem was really creative, and I think that the repitition of the first line really emphasised the point that you were trying to make. The ending was both heartbreaking and intriguing. :D
Nice write,
~PaperHearts

[H]

Powerful, angry, vividly described.

It is not too wordy. It's not perfect either, but it isn't too verbose.

[Not A Writer]

18 yrs or older thing would help for the 2nd line. too wordy also.

[KatieDaray]

I really liked this poem, its a interesting way to format it, good work