The end

The end

 

Bruised,

Bleeding,

Arms covered in her distress

 

Pain,

It hurts,

Her tears spill down on her tattered dress

 

This isn’t the life she wanted

Hell, she only wanted love

 

Not only that,

Love, affection, wealth, a sense of pride

All of the above.

 

Is this what you want?

She screams to the heavens

 

She sinks to the floor,

Her cries are for that of a

Fellow named Devon.

 

But what does he care if I’m hurting?

She continuously asks

 

Deeper and deeper into her

Depression she basks.

 

The dark room is cold

She should’ve listened to all the things she’s

Been told.

 

She’s worthless,

She’ll never amount to a thing.

 

She only wants to be loved,

Above everything.

 

But it seems she won’t even get that

Ha, no surprise.

 

All there’s left to do now,

Is wait and wait as she slowly dies.

 

Devon is left wondering what he did wrong

Unfortunately for him, he wasn’t smart

He didn’t open his eyes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

This is kind of a compilation of False Affection and Twisted Revenge. I tried to fit those two in here. Like a sequel of some sort or something. Hope you liked it. =]

Reviews

[Gianna Perry]

Another incredible piece you've produced. Sam is right, you have a way of conveying your (or perhaps someone else's?) emotions through poetry. There's a strong message that, again, I agree with Sam on. She's right when she says that there aren't too many people looking out for you out there, which is a terrible thing to think about. Once you find that one person who you know is always going to take care of you, it'll all be better. There's no use in killing yourself over someone who's not meant to be... I'm not disagreeing with the ideas portrayed here at all, just rambling on...

The rhyme scheme is fantastic (I'm running out of adjectives to describe this...) and a very good way to draw in the reader. It's a good hook. Overall, another amazing piece. *APPLAUSE!*

~Gianna (but still Shayna on the inside :)

[Rose Tyler]

This is well written, and shows how badly we all can hurt if someone doesn't open their eyes and see the obvious.

[al25]

This is really good. Very well written.

[Angie Diane♥&hea..]

I think this was a good piece...I love the emotions in the piece as well because it makes me think about things...I can see some of this stuff in myself. I believe in some of the stuff said in this poem as well...like never amounting to anything...that is something that I feel like at this moment. Thanks for sharing.

[Legion]

I see where you are going with this and I like it, but I feel there should be more. It seems incomplete to me.

[heich]

sigh...love it..

[Matthew Kult]

I liked it. I thought it was well thought out, well written, and stands alone well. Great work

[Coyote Poetry]

A very sad poem. Some revenge can be turn on you. No peace in death. Better to torture for many years. The flow and story was very good. A odd ending to a very good poem.
Coyote

[KL]

An emotional piece, yes, but this whole topic of sorrowful, heartbroken, smashed dreams, etc. has really been run into the ground for me. It's not your fault, but the majority of them are exactly the same... I can't find anything to really comment on because I feel like I'm repeating myself. It's not bad at all, just not the most original. Just my pennies, not raining down on your writing it's simply not what I'm looking for.

[JelliFyshKissUs]

An addiction of pain that drips down the page with dark obsession. Her anger, sorrow, and hopelessness are felt throughout.