Whispers of the Muse

Moonlight spills through the sable world,

an ephemeral portrait of ethereal mystique

upon a canvas of consuming shadows.

Millions of dazzling points of radiance,

swirling on the mist, dancing to an unheard melody.

Waiting, tremulous, in anticipation of my next move...

A shifting realm of layers, sealed and left to dry.

By morning, the monsters laying in wait will have given up, 

long-since returned to their burrows and caverns.

Frozen in ink, graphite, acrylic and oil.

But what would've been missed in the meantime?

This night survived, but at what cost?

Of course dragons and faeries and elves do not exist

for one who's afraid to see what can't be explained...

Spectral fog curls across the surface of a tepid pool,

tendrils of frost caressing tingling flesh,

as I shiver, ankle-deep, in the icy water.

Two small spheres of light dangle in the distance,

piercing the veil of mist encasing me.

Suffocating the breath from my ever-tightening chest.

At their heart, a dash of black,

like a streak from an artist's undisciplined hand.

But where there is beauty, it's lost beneath the terror

of realizing what I'm staring at... is staring back.

"At last," a predatory voice cuts through the air,

her satisfaction palpable despite the nebulous fog.

"I have been waiting a long time for this.

You haven't been an easy one to track down."

Limbs once made of flesh become as stone,

refusing to budge as my mind screams to run.

The glowing eyes grow larger, closer,

crashing, chaotic slosh of water pounding on my naked ears.

Two clawed hands tear through the air before me,

snaring my shoulders as I summoned the will to move.

Blood runs hot down damp, chilled skin,

as a shapely, yet obscured silhouette floods my gaze.

"Don't kill me!" Wailed through a tightly-clenched throat.

My only answer a wall of deafening silence.

"Kill you?"  She asks finally, a hint of amusement to her voice.

"That's awfully dramatic, even for you, don't you think?"

"Then... what?"  The words fall limply from parted lips,

equal parts terror and inquiry in the hanging tone.

"Why, what else?"  She says, stepping closer,

revealing herself from behind the cloudy curtain of white.

And, though I stared for a breathlessly-long moment,

the details escaped my mind the minute I let them go.

All I recall, as I lift my head from its odd place on my desk,

are the final words seared into my weary soul.

"I'm here to show you," she said softly,

a soothing resonance to her otherworldly facade,

"all the things your searching mind can believe,

and all the desires of your wanting heart."

"After that, show them the true beauty of this world.

Teach them to believe in the magic that first brought you to me.

I shall paint you the scene, I shall teach you the melody,

then you must bring life anew to the wonders you behold tonight."

"Upon you I bestow the key to our immortality.

Share this gift with those who cannot yet see.

Once you have, find your way back to me.

By then, I will have a brand new world to show you..."

The whispers of the muse cause a certain type of madness,

one that is unknown but to those bound by its spell.

To know is to be cursed, to be free is to be tragically lost.

For there is naught more pure and vibrant a soul 

than one that dares to sing with its truest voice.

Author's Note

This is something I wrote a year ago, freshly revived as a pet project of mine. I always really loved this piece in heart, but I couldn't bring myself to reread it as I simply... well, sucked when I wrote the original. Maybe it still does, but at least it can see the light of day once again.

I DID rewrite this with the original style in mind, which is a lot different than how I write today. I'm not sure I've posted much from the early time of my dabbling, so if nothing else this is something of a window into where I began.

Reviews

[Davidgeo]

That was a lot of fluff... so many things don't need to be in there.

Word economy holmes, word economy.

Word economy.

It read like straight exposition and screenplay dialogue at times. Half of that wasn't really poetry.

[Sazaku]

While I really do appreciate the feedback, I'd be better served if you offered more specific examples. I'm open to hearing precisely what you're referring to, as I would've fixed what I saw myself.

Also, and I'm not saying this to sound thin-skinned, but this is MORE than a year old, from long before I took my efforts in poetry seriously. Your points are valid, but I said I left it in it's original form on purpose. This is to serve as a stark contrast to where I am now, not as a benchmark of my current abilities.

I can't help but feel you stumbled upon me through one of my worst pieces to date. Thank you nonetheless for taking the time to read and review my work. Hopefully this doesn't deter you from viewing my other pieces in the future.

[Davidgeo]

Jesus f*****g Christ.... can someone not pretend to be unoffended for a change? Yeah, you're convoluted d bag response does deter me from reviewing you in the future. You want specific examples? THE WHOLE THING.... just type it out word for word with normal punctuation and it is no different from some disjointed teen aged diary entry. It's okay if your thin skinned, just tell me to f**k off. Don't be a whiner cloaked in faux politeness. I'm not here to judge your overall abilities, I could care less about them. This one thing is all I am commenting on. And it will be the last thing of yours I comment on.... you're kind of a d********g.

[Sazaku]

Okay, if you want to be angry, then so be it. I don't think it's unfair to ask for specific advice when all you say is WORD ECONOMY three times and ask like you answered the question of life. All I wanted was to know places you thought were the worst so I could understand your angle. Instead you flame me like a child. Bravo, you're quite the edgy one I see.

The only one offended here is you, I hope you realize.

"This is something I wrote a year ago..."
"I DID rewrite this with the original style in mind, which is a lot different than how I write today."
"... so if nothing else this is something of a window into where I began." ~ All straight from the Author's Note. I don't see how I'm being a whiner in my comment when I LITERALLY ALREADY SAID ALL THESE THINGS.

Nothing about my post is whining OR fake, but go ahead and take your pretentiousness elsewhere. I'm actually surprised it's taken this long to bump into someone this closeminded. Poetry: "writing that formulates a concentrated imaginative awareness of experience in language chosen and arranged to create a specific emotional response through meaning, sound, and rhythm." I know you write in a different style, focused on saying a lot in few words. I read a few of your pieces, and I actually really liked Atlas the Immutable. But am I forced to write in that same style?

God forbid anything not jive with your definition of poetry, right? I'm not saying it's good, but you don't get to say what poetry IS and IS NOT. But honestly, I know you didn't ACTUALLY read a single word I wrote, poem or note, or simply asking a question wouldn't have provoked such a negative response. Please move along.

[Davidgeo]

Ha.... you really haven't seen me angry. I'm quite pleasant at the moment. Maybe you wanna come at me a different way. (you're embarrassing yourself) I'm not what you think I am, my intent is not what you think it is. But whatever dude, take it all as the biggest f****n insult... that's up to you.

[Davidgeo]

(please tell me you at least got the Hulk reference?)

[Sazaku]

Again you completely subvert anything I actually say to try and come off as... what, exactly? Helpful?

What IS your intent? What AM I supposed to think you are?

Cause all you're coming off as is a troll at this point.

I'm always open to hearing critique. God and every other conceivable divinity know I'm not perfect. People have crushed my writing before. All I ask is that they do it in specific ways, not with sweeping, ambiguous phrases. That'd be like telling someone to "fix it" when their car breaks down. Is it such a big deal to want to know what PART you think might be busted?

Oh, and by the by, calling someone's work "some disjointed teen aged diary entry" IS actually an insult.

[Davidgeo]

I'm not "subverting" anything. You're just looking for things that aren't there. And you claim to NOT be 'thin skinned'? Well, you sure are transparent. (stop crying)

[Davidgeo]

I guess the words "word, economy" get you all riled up regardless. Are those your "trigger" words? You're cute.

[Sazaku]

Okay, that's three times you STILL haven't answered a single thing I said. You're a troll, it's hilarious. We get it.

Since this conversation isn't useful to anyone, I'm ending it here and blocking you. I hope you got your rocks off.

Have a nice day. Elsewhere.